The Properties Of Dreams
by NewTownGirl
Summary: What if Rosalie didn't wait to make that fateful call to Edward and Alice never found out Bella was still alive? Can one hasty decision change everything? Can it lead Bella towards a future and a love that she never thought possible? Eventually J/B
1. Chapter 1

What if Rosalie didn't wait to make that fateful call to Edward and Alice never found out Bella was still alive? How can a few hours change, not only the lives of Bella and the Cullens, but everyone they know?

_A/N: Have had this story in my head for a while and finally decided to get it started. The story picks up straight from the end of chapter 15 in New Moon, so you will see some similarities between this chapter and chapter 16 (Paris), although I have made a few changes to make the story work. I also know the New Moon break has been used a thousand times before for Jasper/Bella fanfictions but when this came to me I just couldn't get it to go away. Anways, enjoy!_

_Oh, and just in case you didn't know, I am not Stephenie Meyer, so I don't own Twilight, I'm just borrowing.  
_

**The Properties Of Dreams**

_Goodbye Edward. This is the end, _was my last thought

**1. Juliet**

_Bella  
_

At that moment, my head broke the surface.

How disorienting. I'd been sure I was sinking.

The current wouldn't let up. It was slamming me against more rocks; they beat against the centre of my back sharply, rhythmically, pushing the water from my lungs. It gushed out in amazing volume, absolute torrents pouring from my mouth and nose. The salt burned and my lungs burned and my throat was too full of water to catch a breath and the rocks were hurting my back. Somehow I stayed in one place, though the waves still heaved around me. I couldn't see anything but water everywhere, reaching for my face.

"Breathe!" a voice, wild with anxiety, ordered, and I felt a stab at the hollow of my chest when I recognized the voice—because it wasn't Edward's.

I could not obey. The waterfall pouring from my mouth didn't stop long enough for me to catch a breath. The black, icy water filled my chest, burning.

The rock smacked into my back again, right between my shoulder blades, and another volley of water choked its way out of my lungs.

"Breathe, Bella! C'mon!" Jacob begged.

Black spots bloomed across my vision, getting wider and wider, blocking out the light.

The rock struck me again.

The rock wasn't cold like the water; it was hot on my skin. I realized it was Jacob's hand, trying to beat the water from my lungs. The iron bar that had dragged me from the sea was also… warm… My head whirled, the black spots covered everything…

Was I dying again, then? I didn't like it—this wasn't as good as the last time. It was only dark now, nothing worth looking at here. The sound of the crashing waves faded into the black and became a quiet, even the _whoosh _that sounded like it was coming from the inside of my ears…

"Bella?" Jacob asked, his voice still tense, but not as wild as before. "Bells, honey, can you hear me?"

The contents of my head swished and rolled sickeningly, like they'd joined the rough water…

"How long has she been unconscious?" someone else asked.

The voice that was not Jacob's shocked me, jarred me into a more focused awareness.

I realized that I was still. There was no tug of the current on me—the heaving was inside my head. The surface under me was flat and motionless. It felt grainy against my bare arms.

"I don't know," Jacob reported, still frantic. His voice was very close. Hands—so warm they had to be his—brushed wet hair from my cheeks. "A few minutes? It didn't take long to tow her to the beach."

I realised with a shock the quiet _whooshing _inside my ears was not the waves—it was the air moving in and out of my lungs again. Each breath burned—the passageways were as raw as if I'd scrubbed them out with steel wool.

But I was breathing.

And I was freezing. A thousand sharp, icy beads were striking my face and arms, making the cold worse.

"She's breathing. She'll come around. We should get her out of the cold, though. I don't like the colour she's turning…" I recognized Sam's voice this time.

"You think it's okay to move her?"

"She didn't hurt her back or anything when she fell?"

"I don't know."

They hesitated.

I tried to open my eyes. It took me a minute, but then I could see the dark, purple clouds, flinging the freezing rain down at me. "Jake?" I croaked.

Jacob's face blocked out the sky. "Oh!" he gasped, relief washing over his features. His eyes were wet from the rain. "Oh, Bella! Are you okay? Can you hear me? Do you hurt anywhere?"

"J-Just m-my throat," I stuttered, my lips quivering from the cold.

"Let's get you out of here, then," Jacob said. He slid his arms under me and lifted me without effort—like picking up an empty box. His chest was bare and warm; he hunched his shoulders to keep the rain off of me. My head lolled over his arm. I stared vacantly back toward the furious water, beating the sand behind him.

"You got her?" I heard Sam ask.

"Yeah, I'll take it from here. Get back to the hospital. I'll join you later. Thanks, Sam."

My head was still rolling. None of his words sunk in at first. Sam didn't answer. There was no sound, and I wondered if he were already gone.

The water licked and writhed up the sand after us as Jacob carried me away, like it was angry that I'd escaped. As I stared wearily, a spark of color caught my unfocused eyes—a small flash of fire was dancing on the black water, far out in the bay. The image made no sense, and I wondered how conscious I really was. My head swirled with the memory of the black, churning water—of being so lost that I couldn't find up or down. So lost… but somehow Jacob…

"How did you find me?" I rasped.

"I was searching for you," he told me. He was half-jogging through the rain, up the beach toward the road. "I followed the tire tracks to your truck, and then I heard you scream…" He shuddered. "Why would you jump, Bella? What did you think you were doing? Didn't you notice that it's turning into a hurricane out here?" Anger filled his tone as the relief faded.

"Sorry," I muttered. "It was stupid."

"Yeah, it was _really _stupid," he agreed, drops of rain shaking free of his hair as he nodded. "Look, do you mind saving the stupid stuff for when I'm around? I won't be able to concentrate if I think you're jumping off cliffs behind my back."

"Sure," I agreed. "No problem." I sounded like a chain-smoker. I tried to clear my throat—and then winced; the throat-clearing felt like stabbing a knife down there. "What happened today? Did you… find _her _?" It was my turn to shudder, though I wasn't so cold here, right next to his ridiculous body heat.

Jacob shook his head. He was still more running than walking as he headed up the road to his house.

"No. She took off into the water—the bloodsuckers have the advantage there. That's why I raced home—I was afraid she was going to double back swimming. You spend so much time on the beach…"

He trailed off, a catch in his throat.

"Sam came back with you… is everyone else home, too?" I hoped they weren't still out searching for her.

"Yeah. Sort of."

I tried to read his expression, squinting into the hammering rain. His eyes were tight with worry or pain.

The words that hadn't made sense before suddenly did. "You said… hospital. Before, to Sam. Is someone hurt? Did she fight you?" My voice jumped up an octave, sounding strange with the hoarseness.

"No, no. When we got back, Em was waiting with the news. It's Harry Clearwater. Harry had a heart attack this morning."

"Harry?" I shook my head, trying to absorb what he was staying. "Oh, no! Does Charlie know?"

"Yeah. He's over there, too, with my dad."

"Is Harry going to be okay?"

Jacob's eyes tightened again. "It doesn't look so great right now."

Abruptly, I felt really sick with guilt - felt truly horrible about the brainless cliff dive.

Nobody needed to be worrying about me right now. What a stupid time to be reckless.

"What can I do?" I asked.

At that moment the rain stopped. I hadn't realized we were already back to Jacob's house until he walked through the door. The storm pounded against the roof.

"You can stay _here_," Jacob said as he dumped me on the short couch. "I mean it—right here, I'll get you some dry clothes."

I let my eyes adjust to the dark room while Jacob banged around in his bedroom. The cramped front room seemed so empty without Billy, almost desolate. It was strangely ominous—probably just because I knew where he was.

Jacob was back in seconds. He threw a pile of gray cotton at me. "These will be huge on you, but it's the best I've got. I'll, er, step outside so you can change."

"Don't go anywhere. I'm too tired to move yet. Just stay with me."

Jacob sat on the floor next to me, his back against the couch. I wondered when he'd slept last. He looked as exhausted as I felt.

He leaned his head on the cushion next to mine and yawned. "Guess I could rest for a minute…"

His eyes closed and, after slipping out of my sopping wet clothing, I let mine slide shut, too.

Poor Harry. Poor Sue. I knew Charlie was going to be beside himself. Harry was one of his best friends. Despite Jake's negative take on things, I hoped fervently that Harry would pull through. For Charlie's sake. For Sue's and Leah's and Seth's…

Billy's sofa was right next to the radiator, and I was warm now. My lungs ached in a way that pushed me toward unconsciousness rather than keeping me awake. I wondered vaguely if it was wrong to sleep… or was I getting drowning mixed up with concussions… ? Jacob began softly snoring, and the sound of it soothed like a lullaby. I fell asleep quickly.

For the first time in a very long time, my dream was just a normal dream, just a blurred wandering through old memories—blinding bright visions of the Phoenix sun, my mother's face, a ramshackle tree house, a faded quilt, a wall of mirrors, running through an airport, a flame on the black water… I forgot each of them as soon as the picture changed.

The last picture was the only one that stuck in my head. It was meaningless—just a set on a stage. A balcony at night, a painted moon hanging in the sky. I watched the girl in her nightdress lean on the railing and talk to herself.

Meaningless… but when I slowly struggled back to consciousness, Juliet was on my mind.

Jacob was still asleep; he'd slumped down to the floor and his breathing was deep and even. The house was darker now than before, it was black outside the window. I was stiff, but warm and almost dry. The inside of my throat burned with every breath I took.

I was going to have to get up—at least to get a drink. But my body just wanted to lie here limp, to never move again.

Instead of moving I thought about Juliet some more.

Edward had always been so disparaging of Romeo and Juliet, despite him knowing how much I loved it but I was slowly beginning to agree with him. Juliet had killed herself when Romeo had died and, although Edward was not dead I had very nearly done the same thing after Edward and left, through pure apathy, and was still doing it now.

I had so admired Juliet, unwilling to live without her love, but then what was Juliet without Romeo? The characters defined one another, her written purely to fulfil his fantasy. She had nothing but him by the end of it, as I had felt when Edward had left, but it was not the case anymore.

What if Juliet had had other interests? What if she had a best friend who put up with her no matter what? What if she had had another family to take her in when Romeo had disappeared? And if she did, what had her death done to them?

I suddenly felt very selfish.

Jacob's slow, deep breathing was the only sound in the room – like a lullaby hummed to a child, like the whisper of a rocking chair, like the ticking of an old clock when you had nowhere you needed to go... It was the sound of comfort.

So, what if Romeo was really gone, never coming back, would Juliet be able to live without him? Would she be able to accept that, while she might never feel that way ever again, there were other things to live for? And yet she had just given up, died rather than live without the one she loved.

I closed my eyes and drifted again, letting my mind wander away from the stupid play I didn't want to think about anymore. I thought about reality instead – about jumping off the cliff and what a brainless mistake that had been. And not just the cliff, but the motorcycles and the whole irresponsible Evel Knievel bit. What if something bad happened to me? What would that do to Charlie? Harry's heart attack had pushed everything suddenly into perspective for me. Perspective that I didn't want to see, because—if I admitted to the truth of it—it would mean that I would have to change my ways. Could I live like that?

Maybe. It wouldn't be easy; in fact, it would be downright miserable to give up my hallucinations and try to be a grown-up but, I had just established that Romeo wasn't coming back and I couldn't live my life holding on to him.

I was suddenly downright pissed off at Juliet, had the girl no sense? Was she so selfish as to destroy the people around her because she was unwilling to move on with her life? And more than anything else I hated the Juliet within myself, the child inside me that so wanted to just stop, to leave this world behind. I was disgusted at myself, how could I have allowed myself to get to this point and not realised? How could I have put those I love through this?

I couldn't think about that right now, my mind searched desperately for something else.

Images from my ill-considered afternoon stunt rolled through my head while I tried to come up with something pleasant to think about… the feel of the air as I fell, the blackness of the water, the thrashing of the current… I had not seen his face… I lingered there for a long time. Jacob's warm hands, trying to beat life back into me… the stinging rain flung down by the purple clouds… the strange fire on the waves…

There was something familiar about that flash of colour on top of the water. Of course it couldn't really be fire—

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car squelching through the mud on the road outside. I heard it stop in front of the house, and doors started opening and closing. I thought about sitting up, and then decided against that idea.

Billy's voice was easily identifiable, but he kept it uncharacteristically low, so that it was only a gravelly grumble.

The door opened, and the light flicked on. I blinked, momentarily blind. Jake startled awake, gasping and jumping to his feet.

"Sorry," Billy grunted. "Did we wake you?"

My eyes slowly focused on his face, and then, as I could read his expression, they filled with tears.

"Oh, no, Billy!" I moaned.

He nodded slowly, his expression hard with grief. Jake hurried to his father and took one of his hands.

The pain made his face suddenly childlike—it looked odd on top of the man's body.

Sam was right behind Billy, pushing his chair through the door. His normal composure was absent from his agonized face.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered.

Billy nodded. "It's gonna be hard all around."

"Where's Charlie?"

"Your dad is still at the hospital with Sue. There are a lot of… arrangements to be made."

I swallowed hard.

"I'd better get back there," Sam mumbled, and he ducked hastily out the door.

Billy pulled his hand away from Jacob, and then he rolled himself through the kitchen toward his room.

Jake stared after him for a minute, then came to sit on the floor beside me again. He put his face in his hands. I rubbed his shoulder, wishing I could think of anything to say.

After a long moment Jake pulled away and turned his body to face me.

"How are you feeling? Are you okay? I probably should have taken you to a doctor or something", he sighed.

"Don't worry about me", I croaked.

His eyes caught mine, they were brimmed with red but he looked seriously at me. "You don't look so good."

"I don't feel so good, either, I guess."

"I'll go get your truck and then take you home – you probably ought to be there when Charlie gets back."

"Right."

I lay listlessly on the sofa while I waited for him. Billy was silent in the other room. I felt like peeping tom, peering through the cracks at a private sorrow that wasn't mine.

It didn't take Jake long. The roar of my truck's engine broke the silence before I expected it. He helped me up from the couch without speaking, handing me a large jacket when the cold air outside made me shiver. He took the driver's seat without asking, and then pulled me across next to him so the heat from his body would warm me.

"How will you get home?" I asked.

"I'm not going home. We still haven't caught the bloodsucker, remember?"

My next shiver had nothing to do with the cold.

It was a quiet ride after that. The cold air had woken me up. My mind was alert, and it was working very hard and very fast.

My thoughts about Juliet earlier had stirred something within myself and for the first time in months I wanted to live. I did not want a relationship, I was entirely uninterested in the idea of anyone like that, and I realised with a jolt that I was going to have to explain that to Jake very soon, but I did want to live. I wanted to spend time with my friends, with my father, maybe I would even go down and visit Renee...

Jacob stopped the truck in front of my dark house, cutting the engine so it was suddenly silent.

He threw one arm around me, crushing me to his chest, binding me to him. Neither one of us spoke for several seconds.

"Never do that to me again, Bells", his voice was serious and I grimaced.

"I won't", I looked into his eyes, begging for him to believe me.

"Did you even think about what you were doing?" his eyes were thick with tears, "what would have happened if you had died? Do you know what that would have done to Charlie? To me?"

"I know, Jake, I didn't think."

"Obviously", his tone was sarcastic but he kept his arms around me. "Bella... I have to ask... you weren't trying to...?"

"No", I shook my head vehemently, "at least I don't think so. I didn't really think about it, I just jumped."

This wasn't what he wanted to hear because he pulled me back and looked at me deep in the eyes.

"Do you want to die, Bella?" his eyes were set on mine. I shook my head.

"No, not right now anyway", he scowled at me. "Honestly, Jake, I don't want to die. If anything I feel more alive than ever", I laughed but he did not join in, merely looked at me harder. "Seriously Jake, I'm fine. Let's just leave it."

"If you say so Bells, but if you ever do anything like that to me again you won't have to worry about it working. I'll kill you myself", his deep eyes looked into mine before eventually pulling away and he jumped out the car.

After wrapping the over-large coat I had borrowed around me once more I jumped out behind him. He walked up the drive beside me, watching the edge of the forest carefully and I shivered, imaging Victoria walking out at this moment.

I realised my keys were still in my wet jeans so instead of wading through my bag of soaking clothes I reached up to get the set from the eves. Jake frowned as I unlocked the door and slipped them back into place.

I closed the door behind me and motioned for Jake to go wait in the kitchen.

"I'm going to stick these in the hamper and put some other clothes on, help yourself to anything you want."

I ran upstairs and into my room, closing the door quickly and tossing my borrowed clothes into the hamper followed by everything in the plastic bag. I looked over what was in my room and tried to decide what was an appropriate outfit choice.

Downstairs I heard the phone ring and Jake pick it up but I couldn't go find out who it was, I quickly grabbed the first pair of jogging bottoms and t-shirt that came to my hands and ran downstairs just in time to see Jake replace the receiver.

"Who was that?" I asked as I pulled a yoghurt from the fridge and offered him one. It wasn't till I handed him the spoon as well that I noticed his face, he looked almost afraid to catch my eye.

"Jake, who was that?" he lifted his eyes towards me and I saw a little fear in them.

"It was one of them... Dr Carlisle Cullen", his voice was nervous but he spat the name out quickly, almost as though it tasted bad.

My mind went blank, I was vaguely aware of the fact the yoghurt had slipped out from my hands and was now all over the floor but I couldn't think of what to do with it.

Jake was standing in front of me, his warm hands holding my arms.

"Bella? Bella? Are you ok?"

I looked up at him, trying desperately to remember how to form words.

"Wha... What did he want?"

"He just asked for Charlie... I said he wasn't here, that he was at the hospital making arrangements. I was going to tell him you were upstairs, I promise Bells, but he hung up before I had the chance."

"It's ok, Jake. I... I just wasn't expecting it to be Carlisle", my mind threw me back to the last time I had seen him, carefully picking broken glass out my wounded arm, the fatherly way he reassured me it would all be ok. He had tended my wounds, and then he had left me, they had all left me as surely as Edward had.

For some reason that still hurt, it wrenched at my heart, but I couldn't think of it now. Jake was still looking down at me, concern filling his face and I realised with a start I was now standing in my fallen yoghurt.

"I'm fine, really Jake. Just a bit lost in thought", I slipped out of his arms and grabbed a cloth to clear up the mess on the floor.

"If you're sure Bells... " he grabbed some kitchen roll and knelt down next to me, clearing up the last residual yoghurt and then taking the dirty paper.

I looked at the clock as I stood up, it was close to nine now and after my tiny bit of food my body was yearning for sleep once again. My lungs and throat still felt raw with the sea water I had swallowed earlier and I could large bruises forming over my torso and legs from where they had hit the rocks.

Jake must have noticed me sag because, after chucking the yoghurt cartons in the bin and the spoons in the sink, he put his arm around my waist and began leading me back upstairs.

"I can manage the stairs by myself you know."

"I highly doubt that at the moment Bella, in fact I'm seriously thinking of taking you to a hospital..."

"Don't be silly", my foot caught the stair and I leant into him for further support. "I just need to sleep it off."

"Sure..." he didn't sound convinced. "I'm coming to check on you tomorrow morning, and if you aren't better I am taking you to the doctors, ok?"

His voice left no room for negotiation so I nodded mutely as he placed me in bed. I quickly rolled over and pulled the sheets around me. I felt the bed sag as Jake sat down next to me.

"Night Bells", his voice was gruff with emotion and I looked up towards him. I pulled one hand out of the covers and placed it over his, he looked down at it for a while before pulling away.

"I better go, the guys might need me", he stood up quickly.

"Oh, ok. Take care Jake, if you see her... I don't know, run in the other direction."

"I can't do that Bells."

"You could Jake, you could for me. You're my best friend, I need you."

"Best friend?" he repeated my words quietly.

"Yes, best friend", I reassured him.

"Bye, Bells."

He slipped from the room and I heard the front door close quietly moments later. I turned myself over so I was looking towards the closed window and the dark trees outside, imagining Jake running through them.

As I waited for sleep to take me I thought over the events of the day once more, eventually settling on Carlisle's call to ponder.

I wished I could have known what had been said between him and Jake, I wished it could have been me who had answered the phone instead... but then, what would I have said?

I would not have asked about _him_, I decided quickly. I would have asked if he was enjoying work, what project Esme had keeping her busy, what new computer game Emmett was playing, why they had left without saying goodbye...

A deep pain echoed in my chest and I brought my hand to cover it. It was not the same pain as before though, the pain for Edward had gone to be replaced by something far more poignant.

The romantic love that I had always thought I was missing was no longer the issue, it was the familial love that I missed.

I could not blame them for leaving the way they did; no doubt Edward had been as abrupt with them as he was with me. I remembered he had said they had already left when he said goodbye to me. I would have at least have expected Alice to call, maybe a quick letter saying that she would miss me. I wondered idly what her and Jasper were up to... I hoped he had forgiven himself for what had happened, just as I had.

Perhaps the two of them were travelling, or maybe Alice was at fashion school again, I knew she already had a degree from back in 1993.

At some point in my thinking about Alice I fell asleep, I was imagining her and Jasper travelling through Europe when a scene materialised in front of me.

Alice was running through cobbled streets, her large skirt bustling around her thin legs as she sped through the darkness. She was looking for something, but I did not know what. Her face spun towards me and I could see fear in her eyes, her mouth repeating the same word over and over again silently... 'Edward'

Her eyes went blank and I knew she was having a vision. I tried desperately to ask her what she had seen but she couldn't hear me, instead she started running again, with added purpose. I followed her, finding it easy to keep up with her fast pace.

A couple of minutes later she ran across a large square and I could see the pin pricks of light on the horizon marking the start of a new day. She must have noticed too because she sped up and then slipped into a dark alley off the side of what looked like a church.

I couldn't see anything in the dark but she moved forward with purpose and I followed her. After a moment she stopped and I looked into the darkness, trying to follow her line of vision.

My eyes began to adjust and I could see a figure sitting in the filth ahead of us, his back leaning against the dirty wall. He was filthy, dust and mud covering his clothes and skin but I recognized his body immediately, before he lifted his head to speak.

Edward.

"You won't change my mind", his voice was low, filled with remorse. "There's nothing you can say... it's all my fault."

Alice moved passed me and leant down next to him.

"This isn't the only option, Edward."

"Isn't the only option", his voice was angry. "What other option is there, Alice?"

"Change your mind and I can show you, I can show you what could be."

"It isn't that easy", his head dropped and touched his knees.

"Yes it is, change your mind, just for a moment, and I can show you. Please?" her voice was soothing and she lifted her hand to his face, touching him lightly. He sighed with resignation.

The two of them were silent for a few minutes, his eyes shut as he watched whatever it was Alice could see. I wondered if I was part of it. I wondered why either of them were here in the first place, wherever here was.

Eventually he opened his eyes and looked straight into Alice's. I moved closer to them, eager to know what had happened. His face was shocked and he looked at Alice, his eyes filled with wonder.

"Do you see what I mean?" her voice was nervous, almost hopeful.

"Yes, but we need to run, they're coming for us," he looked desperately towards the back of the alley, it was still shrouded in darkness to me.

"We might just make it," Alice's small voice, despite it's tension, sounded hugely relieved.

"If any one can," he said as he straightened himself. "It's us."

The banging of the front door woke me and I stayed completely still until I heard Charlie's distinctive shuffle in the kitchen below me.

My mind went over the dream once more but I tried to put it to the back of my mind. I did not want to think of Edward right now, and I could not think why my mind had come up with that scenario, probably my thoughts about Alice earlier. Moments later I was asleep again and when I woke in the morning I could not remember dreaming at all.

I was up early after getting to bed at nine the night before but I felt wonderful for it. The pain in my lungs had gone and my throat was only slightly scratchy. Unfortunately the bruises covering me had started to develop and were a horrible green-ish colour, I jumped into the shower and carefully padded myself, trying not to agitate any of them. I wondered if Jake was ok, I would have to call him as soon as it was decent. I was also going to have to let Charlie know that Carlisle had called for him, I didn't think he would be too happy about that.

After quickly washing my hair I jumped out of the shower and began towelling myself down. What with all the drama in my life right now I could be a television show... maybe something on the scyfy channel...

_A/N: So... good? Bad? Indifferent? Please let me know what you think, cookies for reviews! I have already started on the next chapter so it should be out in a couple of days, thanks for reading!_


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Wow, cannot believe the response I got for the first chapter, thanks to everyone who reviewed or put me on their alerts and favourites! In case you didn't know already; I am not SM, I'm just borrowing the characters. _

**The Properties Of Dreams**

**2. Olivia**

_Rosalie_

Twelve unanswered phone calls later and I still didn't regret my decision. I suppose I could have thought about it for longer, agonized over it more deeply but I knew, in the end, my decision would be the same no matter how long I pondered.

I dialled again and went over my script in my head once again. No luck. Damn him. I know he was heartbroken and all that but this is getting ridiculous, he hadn't spoken to anyone in months! I really needed to get through to him as well, before everyone else got back from hunting and tried to stop me, they thought he needed more time...

Seriously, time?

That's one thing we have in abundance, but still, I didn't see why he couldn't get over it here. So his relationship had ended, and he was bummed, but I don't know, to me it just seemed like he didn't _want_ to move on.

Then again... he has been in South America for a while now; maybe he is sowing his wild oats down there before coming back to us. Actually, that thought pissed me off more than anything else. He was probably down there taking care of the urge while the rest of us were up here absolute miserable.

I hit redial on my phone and waited for the sound of his voicemail again. I may think he is being silly and immature and generally a brat but I'm not mean enough to tell him _this_ by voicemail.

"What?"

Seems he managed to tear himself away from his distractions to talk to me...

"Oh, wow. Edward answered the phone. I feel so honoured."

I heard dial tone. Little shit hung up on me, well... maybe I should have been slightly nicer to him. I am calling to tell him his ex-girlfriend is dead after all...

Redial again.

"Get on with it", I knew he wasn't kidding but with no plan of what to say simply blurted out the first piece of information that came into my mind.

"I thought you would want to know that Alice is on her way to Forks."

"What?" his voice was flat, as though he hadn't really heard what I had said.

"You know how Alice is – thinks she knows everything. Like you", sometimes those two really piss me off. They were such know-it-alls, I was surprised Edward didn't already know what I was trying to say, it would be fitting.

Of course, he still wasn't speaking.

"Are you still there, Edward?"

Still nothing

"Edward? Don't you care why Alice is going?" that should at least get a reaction out of him.

"Not particularly", okay, not a reaction but at least a sentence, that was progress. And he didn't seem to care about Alice going, maybe he was finally over that human girl and we could all move on, that should at least make this easier.

"Well, of course, she's not exactly breaking the rules. I mean, you only warned us to stay away from Bella, right? The rest of Forks doesn't matter."

This lack of communication was beginning to make me nervous. I wondered if he was angry at Alice for going, despite what had happened.

A nervous laugh erupted from me, "So you don't need to be angry with Alice."

"Then why are you calling me, Rosalie, if not to get Alice in trouble? Why are you bothering me? Urg"

"Wait", I knew he was going to hang up and I still hadn't told him what I needed to say. "That's not why I called."

"Then why? Tell me quickly, and then leave me alone."

"Well..." I didn't really know where to start.

"Spit it out Rosalie. You have ten seconds", gah, even when he was acting like a child he still managed to make me feel like the idiot.

"I think you should come home", I kept my eye on my watch, trying to get my words out as quickly as possible. "I'm tired of Esme grieving and Carlisle never laughing. You should feel ashamed of what you've done to them. Emmett misses you all the time and it's getting on my nerves. You have a family. Grow up and think about something besides yourself."

"Interesting advice, Rosalie. Let me tell you a little story about a pot and a kettle..."

"I am thinking about them, unlike you. Don't you care how much you've hurt Esme by leaving, if not one else? She loves you more than the rest of us, and you know that. Come home."

I waited for some kind of response but nothing came so I kept going.

"I thought after this whole Forks thing was finished, you would get over it."

"Fork's was never the problem Rosalie... Just because Bella had moved to Florida, it doesn't mean that I'm able... Look, Rosalie. I really am sorry, but, trust me, it wouldn't make anyone happier if I were there".

Well, here goes...

"Umm..."

Jesus, could I not come up with anything better than that?

"What are you not telling me, Rosalie?" his voice was anxious now and it was almost a relief to hear some genuine emotion in it. "Is Esme, all right? Is Carlisle-"

"They're fine. It's just... well, I didn't say that Bella moved."

Back to the silence. Say something woman!

"They didn't want to tell you, but I think that's stupid. The quicker you get over this; the sooner things can go back to normal. Why let you mope around the dark corners of the world when there is no need for it? You can come home now. We can be a family again. It's over."

I willed for him to react: to say he would be home, to ask me for details, to cry, anything...

"Edward?"

"I don't understand what you are saying, Rosalie."

He was being a little bit slow... and I really didn't want to have to spell it out for him. Comfort is not an area I excel in.

"She's dead, Edward - I'm... sorry. You have the right to know, though, I think. Bella... threw herself off a cliff yesterday. Alice saw it, but it was too late to do anything. I think she would have helped, broken her word, if there had been time. She just left to see if she could do anything to Charlie. You know how she's always cared for him. But you-" I realised I was listening to dial tone again.

Well I had done my part; I had played nice and let him know. It was the right thing to do and the rest of them would thank me for it when he got home. I could imagine the smile on Esme's face, her joy at having her first son home and maybe Carlisle would clap me on the back the way he does when one of the boys please him, or hug me close as he does Alice.

Emmett and Jasper would be pleased as well, both of them missed their brother dearly, and it might help Emmett out of the depression he was in over Bella's death, apparently she had gained the affection of more of my family than I knew, despite what had happened. My joy at our imminent reunion was quite complete though and I realised with a jolt that even I felt bad about her death, just a little.

I was more upset about the waste though, she had the chance to have a full life, a family, grow old, be a mother and she threw it all away, and for what? Silly girl.

My moment of mourning was disrupted when the phone, still next to me, began vibrating in earnest.

I picked it up expecting to see Edward's number, letting me know he was on his way home but instead Alice's number flashed at me.

"What have you done?" Alice's voice was shrill and angry in my ear. "Where's Carlisle?"

"He's out hunting Alice, he didn't take his phone. He'll be back in about an hour though, or I can go find him."

"There isn't time", her voice was filled with malice and I could help but ask her what was going on. She ignored me.

"You spoke to Edward", I know it wasn't a question but answered anyway.

"Yes, I spoke to him a couple of minutes ago. I let him know about what happened to Bella and honestly Alice I think he had the right to know."

She cut me off again.

"Do you even realise what you've done? You stupid bitch. You stupid, selfish whore", who the hell did she think she was speaking to? I tried to cut in but she acted as though I wasn't even there. "He's going to them, he's going to the Volturi and I don't know if I can get him to change his mind", she paused but I was too scared to talk. What did she mean he was going to the Volturi? There was only one reason any of our kind went to them... he couldn't have taken Bella's death that badly, could he? And would they even do it? Aro was an old friend of Carlisle's, they had lived together for years, surely he wouldn't allow his friend's son to commit suicide?

"I don't understand Alice..." the whisper that came out my mouth was quieter than the breeze but she heard it.

"You told him Bella was dead, that she had killed herself Rosalie. What the hell did you think was going to happen? It's fucking Edward! Of course he's over reacting as usual and now I have got to go stop him doing the stupidest thing in the world. I hope you know there is a good chance we will both die because of your meddling. If only you had left it alone everything would have worked out the way I saw..." her voice cracked for a moment and I tried to speak but she stopped me.

"I don't want to hear it Rosalie. I don't want to hear your voice ever again, you just fucked everything, You couldn't keep your fucking nose out of it could you, well I hope you're happy because you have ruined all of our lives, whether I get out of this or not."

What did she mean? Surely Aro would just turn down his request and he would be send on his way. Alice continued to rant in my ear, talking about how close all her plans were to coming together, how everyone would have been happy

I couldn't speak, I could barely think but she didn't seem bothered. Of course she would know my reaction to her words as well as she knew I had never intended for it to turn out like this. I thought I was doing the right thing, I had been so certain...

"Goodbye Rosalie, I don't have time to call anyone else or wait for Carlisle to get home. I have a plane to catch. I'll let you tell them what you have done, maybe they will find it in their hearts to forgive you but I certainly can't". She sobbed quietly but I held back from speaking. "Our deaths will be on your hands."

I didn't register as she hung up. I remained seated, the phone beeping in my ear. What had I done? What had Alice been talking about? Obviously she saw Edward's conversation with Aro, Caius and Marcus going badly but why? And how with one conversation had I destroyed this entire family? Their deaths would be on my hands... Esme and Carlisle would never forgive me and Jasper, what would my brother do when he knew I had sent his, albeit slightly estranged at the moment, wife to apparently certain death.

I did the only thing I was capable of and dropped the phone to move towards the door. I wrenched it open and looked across the vast Alaskan wilderness that lay at the door.

"EMMETT!" my voice bounced off the mountains surrounding us and I was sure even the human settlement over ten miles away would have heard me but I didn't care. I needed him here, now.

The peace of the forest and deep blue of the sky was at complete odds with how I felt, I held on to the door with all my might, using it as an anchor. I could feel the wood splitting under my fingers.

"Rose", I turned to his voice and saw him walk from the forest only meters away from me. At the sight of him I couldn't help but let go of the door and I fell ungracefully to the floor. I didn't reach it, his arms were around me and I could see over his shoulder Jasper emerging from the forest recoiling at the storm of emotion around me..

I looked up searching for Emmett's golden eyes and they gazed down at me, filled with love and concern.

"Emmett..." my voice cracked as I searched for the words. "I think I've done something terrible."

_A/N: So, again, love it? Hate it? Think I am totally off base with Rosalie? Make me smile and leave a review, please? :)_


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: Again, wow, thanks for all the response guys - it's unbelieveable! Hope you like this chapter, I'm not ensurely happy with it, but I didn't want to leave y'all waiting any longer so here goes:  
_

**The Properties Of Dreams**

**3. Porcia**

_Bella_

The past week had been yet more of the usual monotony, but this time with a few exceptions.

Jake seemed to be treating me differently from usual, ever since Carlisle's call he had been edgy, as though expecting one or more of them to reappear. I had tried to reassure him that none of them would want to see me and therefore had no reason to come back but that hadn't helped. He desperately wanted to know what I would do if they did return and my inability to answer him was driving a wedge between us. It wasn't that I didn't want to answer him, I simply couldn't.

There were other differences as well though; our relationship had been inexplicably changed after that phone call. Although we were nearly back to normal there was a distance between us that, while slightly upsetting, seemed safer than before. His eyes no longer roamed my body whenever he thought I wasn't looking and he made considerably less innuendoes. In fact the majority of the time we were around each other, which was still pretty much constant due to the threat of Victoria, he looked far deeper in thought than I had ever seen before.

Part of me was upset that he apparently no longer found me attractive, not for the sake of my vanity of course but because I was worried he would find someone else. Someone else who would take my place in his life, but at the same time the space it gave me was refreshing.

I was worried about him however, in fact I was worried about all of them; Victoria had not reappeared since Harry Clearwater's funeral, where she had apparently come to taunt the wolves. That hadn't stopped the constant vigil at my house though. Jake insisted on being there every night, usually with another member of the pack for support and, to allow him some time to sleep, I was still spending the majority of my time at the Reservation so he felt I was safe.

Actually, I thought with trepidation, this was quite probably the first time I had been alone since the whole thing had come out after my failed cliff diving. I had insisted on leaving Billy's while Jake was still asleep, not wanting to wake him so I could go home to cook for Charlie.

The thought that I was all alone made me shudder though and I got up to close the window of my room, as though that would help I chuckled darkly.

I jumped, nearly dropping the window on my fingers when the doorbell rang softly.

I made my way downstairs slowly, trying to make as little noise as possible. Surely Victoria would not ring the door before killing me, but then again I wouldn't put anything past her.

The door had rung twice more as I made my way downstairs, although it did not seem impatient, more determined. Well, if it was Victoria surely she would have simply barrelled through the door by now.

Slowly I reach up to the lock and then pulled the door open.

The sight that appeared to me was so unbelievable I blinked but before I had time to open my eyes again she was on me.

"Oh Bella, my dear, dear Bella", one arm was tightly around my waist while the other ran through my hair. "Oh my darling Bella, we thought... oh Bella you have no idea how glad I am to see you."

And then Esme collapsed into my arms, her tearless cries muffled by my shoulder.

It was difficult, and took a huge amount of time but eventually I managed to manoeuvre the rock solid vampire in my arms into the house and the two of us sunk on to the sofa.

She still didn't let go of me and her sobbing continued, what tiny snippets I picked up made no senses. "Alice... vision... Edward... South America... Carlisle... Thought they would be here... But...", I shushed her and began stroking her hair, unsure what exactly was going on.

Time passed. I didn't know how much but eventually her crying quietened. I wondered idly if this is what it had been like to be around me just after _he_ left but the thought that something had hurt her so badly terrified me. I could not bear the thought of her being in pain. Then again _he_ had said I would never see any of them again and yet here Esme was, obviously distraught by something, although I could not fathom what.

"Esme?" my voice was quiet but I knew she would hear me.

She inhaled deeply and turned her body so we were facing one another, although she kept one hand on me, as though afraid to let go.

"What's happened, Esme?" she looked up at me and I saw something I had not expected. She looked timid, afraid and above all confused.

It was strange to see the woman I had thought of as a mother, a rock of emotional support so torn up, she looked much younger than her 70 year old self; indeed she looked younger than the 26 year old woman she had been when she was changed.

"I'm sorry Bella, I didn't mean to frighten you, I just... I didn't expect to see you, that's all", I didn't have time to question why she would come to my house and not expect to see me before she continued. "I had come by to speak to Charlie, I... I wasn't expecting you to be here..."

She didn't say anything more, just looked at me even harder though trying to see through me. It was eerily similar to the way Edward would look at me when he was desperately trying to read my thoughts.

"You keep saying that, Esme. Why on earth would you come here, to Forks, to my house, and not expect to see me?" her face was filled with such exquisite pain and anguish in that moment I nearly forgot to breath. She looked down at her hands before answering.

"We thought you were dead Bella... Alice, she saw you throwing yourself off a cliff, she saw you killing yourself. I had come to give Charlie my condolences, among other things."

I looked at her is shock, I had, admittedly, not thought of that.

"Well as you can see I'm not dead", best to clear up that little misunderstanding first. She nodded but still looked at me questioningly. "And I wasn't trying to kill myself. I was cliff diving."

"Cliff diving?" her voice betrayed some doubt but also interest and I couldn't help but smile. I could just imagine the reaction _he_ would have to that, _he_ would have gone crazy. It was funny how much easier it was to think about him now, maybe I was nearly reaching the point where I would be able to hear his name without freaking out. A major relief seeing as I couldn't see a conversation with Esme going by without him coming up.

I realised I hadn't responded and quickly tried to think of information I could add so she would believe me.

"I was out with my friend Jake", I figured a little lie was a good idea here but she was still looking at me searchingly.

"Alice didn't see anyone else in her vision", her golden eyes were probing my own but I had started now so I continued.

"They had already jumped in", I was getting good at this, although I couldn't quite understand why I was having to defend myself to her anyway, now that I had got over my shock that she was here my anger was making a bit of a come back.

"They?"

"Jake and some of his friends, they're all from out at La Push."

She was gazing at me, concern filling her face now and she bit her lip but still did not say anything for a couple of minutes.

"So, you weren't trying to kill yourself...?"

"No", at least that part was true. I had not gone to the cliffs with the aim of killing myself, although I had come close anyway.

"Alice didn't see that bit", her voice trembled.

"Esme", I moved closer, suddenly desperate to comfort this woman I had loved as dearly as my own mother. "You said you wanted to talk to Charlie... what's happened? Is this why Carlisle tried to get in touch with him last week?"

She sat up quickly; "Carlisle called last week?" she looked suspicious although it wasn't directed at me.

"Yes, he spoke to one of my friends, I wasn't feeling well. He asked for Charlie then hung up when Jake said he was out." She looked even more confused but didn't say anything so I kept going. "There is something else going on here Esme, what is it? All this isn't just because you thought I was dead."

It sounded self depreciating but it was true. None of them had cared enough to say goodbye to me, why would they care now and Esme was obviously still upset about something, she had almost chocked over Alice's name earlier.

"Well of course we were all devastated by what Alice saw..."

I could see her searching for the words but I didn't help. I had a horribly suspicion she was going to apologise for the way they had all left me and I didn't want to hear it. I didn't want to hear her apologise for how they left, not one of them bothering to say goodbye to me or contact me since then. I especially didn't want to hear her apologise for him, for how he had left me, for the months of pain that had followed his departure, for the brutality of his final act; stripping me over every ounce of self-respect and esteem I had and leaving me alone in the forest. _His_ actions were those of a coward, a man too afraid to be with me but at the same time willing to break me so I could never be with anyone else. And they had allowed it, however indirectly the whole family had allowed him to act like that, to leave like they were cowards too.

She was talking again but I was barely registering her words, I was so caught up in my anger towards him. She I could maybe forgive, if Edward had told them not to speak to me I knew they wouldn't defy him, they couldn't without his knowledge... but him, him I could maybe forgive... but I didn't think I would ever forget.

"... I don't think she knew what her actions would cause, she thought she was doing it for the best but by the time Alice saw it... it must have been too late because we can't find either of them. Of course Carlisle has contacted the Volturi but they deny any knowledge of either of their whereabouts so I thought they might have come here. I wanted to check on them."

"The Volturi?" it was the first thing I had understood since she began talking and I turned to look at her and immediately panicked. I could remember Edward talking about the three brothers who ruled over the vampire world and shuddered, not at their eerily pale skin in Carlisle's painting or the fear they had instilled in me but at the pain that a happy memory of Edward incurred.

She gazed back and, apparently, realised I had lost the drift of the conversation.

"Yes..." she slowed down, obviously trying to work out which point I may have lost it at. "When he heard you were dead he went straight to them. Apparently stowed away on the first flight out of Rio, Alice saw it and called Rosalie..." she shuddered but I still wasn't sure what she was talking about. "We know Alice got there with the aim of finding him before he... but we haven't heard from either of them in seven days now. I don't know where they are... we were all so certain they would have come here"

"Who came here?" I was still lost, desperately trying to work out what important point I had been missing.

"Edward and Alice, Bella... they're missing."

My heart started the pound uncontrollably and suddenly, inexplicably, it all started to make a very horrible kind of sense, he had told him I was dead. He had gone to the Volturi to... to...

"But... but... that doesn't make any sense!" I was practically shouting, my face flooding with blood and I could feel the pricking of threatening tears, my emotions taking control of me. "Why would he do that? He didn't love me! He said so! Why would he do that?"

Esme was looking at me but I couldn't see her anymore. Apparently was healing was not quite complete, hearing his name from someone else's lips had pushed me over the ledge once again and I was hanging on for dear life to stop myself regressing back to the zombie I had been before.

"He didn't want me anymore... why would he?" I demanded from her.

_"Bella, I don't want you to come with me." He spoke the words slowly and precisely, his cold eyes on my face, watching as I absorbed what he was really saying._

_There was a pause as I repeated the words in my head a few times, sifting through them for their real intent._

_"You… don't… want me?" I tried out the words, confused by the way they sounded, placed in that order._

_"No."_

"It wasn't Carlisle on the phone was it? Jake said Charlie was at the hospital", Esme shook her head, a pained look on her face.

"I promised..." I thought back to the oath he had forced me to make. "He made me promise..."

"_Don't do anything reckless or stupid."_

"He was meant to do the same thing..."

"He was meant to do what, Bella?" I jumped at the sound of Esme's voice. I had nearly forgotten that she was here, so lost in the memory of Edward's hard face dismissing me.

"He told me to be safe... he was meant to do the same thing."

Her eyes widened and mouth opened to form a perfect o.

We realised at the same moment what must have happened when he had heard I had jumped. He had thought that I had broken my promise and had blamed himself, blamed himself for my death and decided...

"But you said the Volturi didn't know where they were", my thoughts turned to Alice, my sister who had left so quickly, unwilling to even stop to say goodbye, who must have surely seen my months of torment after their departure and had done nothing to ease my suffering. But somehow I knew it would be her who would go after him, to try to prevent his untimely death...

"Yes", Esme's voice was harder now and I glanced up, catching her eyes. "Carlisle has spoken to Aro several times on the phone. He claims that Edward approached them but never returned for their answer", she pursed her lips, apparently disbelieving of Aro. "Rose and Emmett are considering going to Italy to try and get some answers", her eyes softened at the mention of her children. "I think Rose blames herself for telling him... I believe Alice was quite unforgiving on the phone."

"So they might not be dead?" my voice rose slightly with relief, despite my displeasure with all of them, him in particular, despite the pain in the chest, my hatred mixed with the remnants of love I still felt and I knew, no matter what, I did not want him dead.

"No", her words were careful. "They might not be dead... I thought they might be here, I thought, perhaps, they had come to see Charlie", I glanced around, almost hopefully as though they would emerge from the shadows of the room and confess they had been here all along. "But I knew as soon as I arrived they had not. I should call Carlisle, he doesn't know where I am... he didn't think I should come, we were so certain they would be here and he wanted to give them time to grieve."

My heart sunk. No, if they truly believed I was dead they would have no reason to come here. If Alice convinced him his guilt over my 'death' was unnecessary they would have no reason to.

"I'm sorry for coming Bella, Carlisle told me not to and I should have listened. I should have turned back as soon as I knew they hadn't been here. I shouldn't have come when you asked us not to."

That caught me off guard.

"I... I asked you not to?" what was she talking about?

Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"Yes..." she suddenly looked very confused, as though searching for the missing piece in a puzzle. "When you split up with Edward", well that was an interesting titbit. My whole face blanched but she continued on, obviously wanting to finish what she had to say. "He told us you didn't want to see us again, that you wanted a clean break", she looked so ashamed, so upset, her whole face broke , unfortunately I had the opposite reaction, I felt my face go red, my pulse begin hammering in my veins and suddenly I realised with relish that this was an emotion towards Edward I could deal with, suddenly I was very , very angry.

"HE TOLD YOU WHAT?" my voice echoed around the small house and Esme shrank away from me briefly before throwing her arms around me once more.

"I knew you wouldn't say that, I knew you wouldn't want us to leave without saying goodbye", she was crying again although no tears were falling and tried to reach her arms around me but I couldn't put my arm around her, I couldn't even move, my whole body was shaking with anger.

I had to extract myself from her, I was so worried I would lash out I stood up from the sofa. My mind was desperately trying to comprehend what was going on.

"He told you I didn't want to see you?"

My voice was low, nearly a growl.

She nodded mutely, her face shocked at the strength of my reaction. I sank to my knees, still in the middle of the room.

"He told you I broke up with him?" my voice broke and Esme stared at me in confusion.

"You... you didn't break up with him?" her voice seemed far away.

"No, I didn't-"

The front door opened and I heard Charlie shuffle in. Both of us gazed at the door of the living room, waiting for his appearance and I stood up quickly, trying to hide my emotions.

"Bells?" his voice came from the hall and I called him into the living room.

He jumped when he caught sight of Esme but quickly righted himself.

"Mrs Cullen, to what do we owe the pleasure?"

His words were welcoming but the tone made it quite clear she had caught him by surprise.

Esme immediately jumped to her feet and went over to greet him.

"Oh Chief, please call me Esme. I'm sorry to be round so late, I was in the area and couldn't pass by without stopping in the check on Bella."

He glanced round her to take a look at me and I tried to make myself as presentable as possible but I was sure he could tell the conversation had bothered me. My cheeks felt hot and the back of my eyes were pricking, my brain racing as I thought of everything I had learnt in the past hour.

"Well it's a pleasure to have you Esme", he smiled at her though I could still see trepidation in his eyes. "Is it just you visiting us...?" he glanced round as though expecting the rest of the Cullens to appear from the kitchen.

"No, no", her assurances were swift and she glanced at me questioningly. "It's just me."

That cheered him up considerably.

"Oh, well then..." he turned to look at me and then glanced back towards Esme and quickly round the room. I watched his eyes making each movement, wondering what was going through his mind. "Bells, do you think you could go grab us some drinks from the kitchen? And maybe a snack, it's getting a bit late to start dinner."

I knew immediately what he was doing, he wanted me out the room to question Esme about Edward but I couldn't think of a reason to stay so simply slunk off down the hall to the sound of Esme's "nothing for me".

I tried to be as quiet as possible while fixing two glasses of juice and two sandwiches for Charlie and I. The odd word floated in from the other room, Edward's name and Switzerland, and then Esme asking about me after they left, I heard her gasp of horror as Charlie mentioned the forest, my nightmares, Renee coming to try and take me home.

"...it was like she was a different person."

I banged loudly in the hall and Charlie cut off his sentence quickly. I wasn't happy he had spoken to Esme about what her son had done but at least it meant I didn't have to. I didn't think I could speak about what had happened yet. I had obviously missed some of the nuances of their conversation as when I looked up from placing the tray on the table Esme's eyes looked like they were brimming over again and I was forced to look away.

No one spoke as I sat down and lifted a sandwich to my mouth.

"Well, it's getting late", Esme glanced at her watch. "I should be going", she looked at Charlie with a look of concern on her face and I was surprised when he smiled back at her. "I think I'll be staying in town for a little while... after what we've spoken of." She glanced at both of us meaningfully. "I'll see you both soon... Bella", she looked round at me and I glanced up, my mouth still full, "perhaps you could walk me out?"

I tried to swallow too quickly and failed but managed to nod and stand up to follow her to the door. By the time we reached it I had just managed to get it down without choking.

"I hope that you don't mind I am staying Bella, it appears there are many more questions that need answering than I previously thought", I nodded dumbly as she continued, "I am going to call Carlisle, there is a good chance he will want to join me here... Rose and Emmett had spoken of travelling to Europe to see the Volturi and talk to them in person which I think is even more necessary now but I would like to check that it is ok if Jasper joins me also."

"Of course it is, why wouldn't it be?" but I needn't have asked. Of course Edward had blamed the incident with Jasper for my 'leaving' him, a concept I still hadn't quite come to terms with. Esme seemed to realise this too and sagged slightly. "I never blamed Jasper for what happened, Esme. You have to let him know that. He must hate me, his wife is missing because of me, or at least he will when he realises I'm alive". I couldn't help but giggle hysterically.

"He doesn't hate you Bella, Jasper has had a hard couple of months, him and Alice... well it's not my place to talk about it but, but he will be so relieved to know that you are both alive and willing to have him here", she listened to the air briefly then turned to me. "I better go; I think Charlie is shuffling because he's worried about where you are. I told him Edward and Alice are in Europe at school, in case he mentions it, while Rosalie and Emmett are at college at Dartmouth", she sniffed at the air and winced slightly. "Be careful, Bella. Call me if you need anything, _anything_."

"I will Esme... will I see you again?" I was almost nervous to ask. I had missed her so much since they had left, the idea of being able to see any one of them again was overwhelming me with emotions.

"Of course my dear", she leant down to kiss me lightly on the cheek. "I will be here whenever you want me, always".

I couldn't help but pull her into a hug. Tonight had been a rollercoaster of emotion but I couldn't deny my relief about being able to see her again.

After maybe a minute of Esme cradling me against her cold body she whispered lightly in my ear, "Charlie sounds like he is about to come out. I have to go but I will see you soon my dear, I promise", and then she was gone. I was holding air and she had already jumped into Carlisle's dark Mercedes. I couldn't help but wonder what he had thought when he realised both it and Esme were missing and before I knew it she was gone, the lights of the car disappearing into the darkness at the end of the street.

"Bella!" Charlie must have heard the car as it left. I quickly closed the door and made my way back to the living room.

He had turned the television on in my absence and I sank down heavily on the sofa next to him.

"Tough night, Bells?" he turned his eyes from the game to glance at the heap I had created next to him. I nodded, not meeting his eyes.

"Aye, thought so", we slipped back into silence as he passed me the remains of my sandwich and I quickly ate it and threw my juice back before making my excuses and heading upstairs to bed.

My mind was still pounding with all the new information I had to process as I lay down on my bed.

I still couldn't quite comprehend that Edward had told his family I had split up with him, and that I didn't want to speak to them. It had been dirty and underhanded of him to even think of it. I shuddered to think of what they had thought of me, throwing them all aside and realised I understood exactly, it was just what had been done to me also. I was also disgusted that he had cited Jasper as the cause of our parting, he knew better than anyone I had forgiven Jasper the moment that had happened.

It was all my fault, I should never have been silly enough to cut myself in a house full of vampires, it was an invitation to be bitten.

It must have destroyed Jasper to think that he was the reason for the family having to move.

Surely Alice must have known the truth; she must have seen that he was planning to leave me, and not the other way around. And why hadn't she known I survived from my experience last week?

My mind was suddenly brought back to the most pressing issue. _Edward_ had gone to Italy, gone to see the Volturi and Alice had followed him, and now... now they were both missing.

I went over what Esme had told me about the succession of events and the obvious doubts she had about what Aro had told Carlisle. It had been my impression that Carlisle and Aro had been friends; would he really lie to him? But then, what else could have happened to them? I was going to have to talk to Esme again, get the whole story in order to understand. I was just thinking about the conversation she must be having with Carlisle at this very moment when a heard a loud crack on my window.

I jumped up, knowing only one person who would consider my second floor window an appropriate entrance. Although maybe that was going to change with some of the Cullen's back in town... bah, stop being silly Bella, it's only Esme, Carlisle and Jasper who are coming back. None of them will be making late night visits to my room.

I opened the window and stood back as Jake leapt into the tree and then to my room. His arms were around me in moments, cradling me close to him.

"What the hell happened? Why didn't you wake me before you left? Are you trying to kill yourself? You're ok though", he was patting me down as though searching for injuries. "You're ok... you're ok. What the hell happened Bella? Why aren't you dead?"

I pushed myself back and looked incredulously at him.

"Why the hell does everyone think I am meant to be fucking dead?"

His face was confused now and he looked a little embarrassed by my outburst. I couldn't recall a time I had sworn in front of him before, in fact I couldn't recall a time I had swore in front of anyone. Jake's face returned to normal and he moved towards me again, as though unwilling to let him away from me.

"I can smell it... all over the house... all over you."

"You can smell what, Jake?"

He wrinkled up his nose, "vampire".

"Oh that", I couldn't believe I hadn't realised he would know Esme had been here. "Don't worry Jake, it's wasn't Victoria", I expected that to calm him but instead he tensed up further.

"Was it him?" his voice was thunder and I trembled slightly as I shook my head.

"No", it came out barely a squeak,"Esme."

"His mom?"

"Well, yes, I suppose you could call her that."

He sat down heavily on my bed and I worried Charlie would hear him from downstairs but he didn't come up.

"Hurry up and get talking Bells, I want to hear everything..."

I fell back on my bed and felt it dip underneath his weight as he sat next to me. This was going to be one seriously long night.

_A/N: So, was worth me getting it out now or should I have tweaked some bits before? Did you guys hate the whole Edward lying shabang? Felt a bit cliche writing it but I felt it was the only way to explain all of them leaving without saying anything (I always found it a bit unbelieveable in the books they were so willing to listen to Edward when he was obviously making such a bad decision). _

_Speaking of problem chapters I was thinking of trying to get a beta for this thing so if anyone out there in ff-world has the spare time to help me out let me know, by either leaving a review or messaging me. Thanks again for reading guys ^_^_


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: I am not Stephenie Meyer - I just like to play with the characters.  
_

**4. Captain Crewe**

_Esme_

Even with my vampiric senses I was still feeling as though my brain was overloading at the moment.

Bella was alive – is alive.

My daughter is alive.

And my son... my thoughts towards Edward were horribly conflicted. I was so unbelievably angry with him it was causing me problems driving, I wanted to box his ears for treating Bella that way, for treating all of us that way. I was also disgusted, Edward and I had always been close, it was painful to think that he would treat anyone with the disrespect he had treated Bella. I had always believed him to be so strong, I had been so proud of the way he had overcome his thirst for his singer in order to fall in love with her but this, it tainted everything. Not just the past couple of years but everything.

Yet, despite all my anger, I was still deeply worried for him, even more now than I had been before. I had assumed that if Aro had been telling the truth he would have come straight here but his scent was no where around either our house or Bella's. I couldn't help but imagine something terrible had happened to both him and Alice.

Alice, had she known what Edward had done? Had the stood by and allowed her friend, her sister to be hurt like this? There were still so many questions.

I barely registered the drive to the house, not that it was necessary for me to pay close attention; I knew the roads around here like the back of my unlined hand.

As I reached the house I could hear the phone ringing. I had not brought my mobile, unwilling to give either Carlisle or Jasper the chance to sway me from my decision. They and Emmett had all insisted that if what Aro was saying was true we should leave Edward his space to grieve but if they weren't here where would they be?

After parking the car in the empty garage and ran into the house and caught the phone just before it went to the answering machine.

There were already 56 missed calls, in addition to 13 messages.

"Esme?" his voice was panicked and immediately felt guilty for having been the cause of yet more worry for him. The past few months had been hell for all of us but for Carlisle it was the worst. He had worked so hard for the past century building a family only for him to see it fall apart in front of him.

"Carlisle", I heard him sigh at the other end of the phone. "I'm so sorry my love, I shouldn't have left without letting you know where I was going. I just, I had to come..." I begged silently for him to understand.

"I know you did", his voice was still tense but had calmed considerably, "Esme... did, did you find them?"

I had dreaded the question, but had known it would be the first thing he would ask. I just didn't know how to tell him, I didn't know how to tell him any of what I had learned tonight, it was too horrendous, too painful, at least I knew his joy at Bella being alive might help with some of his pain.

"No, I'm sorry my dear. They aren't here", I knew his shoulders would drop at this piece of information. I hoped that perhaps my other news would placate him slightly. "But I did find something I wasn't expecting."

I hoped that by giving some mystery he would be forced to interact with me. My husband, while as attentive as always, had not been the same since we had left Forks, he had been almost a shell, barely able to communicate with anyone, even me.

"And what is that, my love?" his voice sounded tired, almost old but he was playing along, I only hoped it was a good sign.

"I went to visit Charlie this evening..."I paused, hoping he would react but with a flat voice he began speaking again

"I hope you sent him our regards, it's a tragedy, just terrible..." his was voice was low and heaped with regret.

"Carlisle", I interrupted him, "Bella isn't dead."

That shocked him, I heard him stand up quickly and walk across the room.

"What do you mean she isn't dead?" My heart welled up as I heard the emotion in his voice and suddenly I felt daring.

"What else could I mean you twazzock? Bella is alive, I just spoke to her."

"She's alive?" his voice suddenly soft, hopeful almost.

"Yes", Jesus, for a doctor he was sometimes very slow, not that I wasn't enjoying playing with him slightly. Vampire minds truly are easily distracted; all I could think of was the joy my husband and I could share over the news of our youngest daughter. "Apparently she didn't try and kill herself, she was cliff diving with friends, although I'm not too sure about that... but, Carlisle," suddenly I was nervous, "Edward lied to us."

He didn't say anything so I continued.

"Bella didn't leave Edward, Carlisle, he left her. He left her, alone in the woods, he broke her heart."

"What?"

His voice was loud and incredibly angry.

"I don't know what to think, Carlisle, but I do think you should come here. Bring Jasper, we all need to speak to Bella. Something very strange is going on here."

"Yes, yes", I could hear him moving quickly around the house in Alaska and wondered what he was doing. "I think that would be the best solution. I want to speak to Bella myself and if Edward and Alice are going to appear anywhere it will be there, or at least I think it will be."

"I'm so glad you agree."

"Esme", his voice was softer now, like it was when we were apart from the rest of the world, a way I had not heard it in the past months "I'm sorry if you thought I was angry with you, I was just so worried when you disappeared. I... I couldn't bear the thought of loosing you as well."

"I know, my love."

"If Edward and Alice truly haven't been to Forks it appears Rosalie and Emmett will have to make their planned trip to Italy. I hate to let them go but when they find out they aren't there I fear I will be unable to convince them otherwise."

I could completely understand his trepidation; I was as unhappy as him about the idea of yet more of my children separating from me but at the same time I could not deny that it would be a relief to have someone in Italy to get some answers for us, I thought briefly of asking the Denali's to help but quickly pushed it out of my mind. The sisters were very nervous of the brothers, and for good reason, and Eleazor and Carmen would not be keen to visit Italy either.

"I need to speak to Rose; I think she should hear it from me that Bella is still alive... I'm not sure how she is going to take it", Rosalie and I had talked extensively over the past week about what had happened. I knew the guilt she felt over what had happened was eating her alive, without needing to ask Jasper, it was written all over her face. I honestly didn't know whether finding out that Bella was alive was going to have a positive or negative effect on her mood.

"Will you please ask her to come to the phone?" my voice was pitched with nerves. I don't what was wrong with me today but I was feeling like a little girl again, all the emotions swirling around were making it difficult to maintain my usual calm air.

"Of course my dear, if that's what you think is right."Carlisle's voice soothed me further and I realised how desperately I had missed him over these past few days.

"Thank you, love. Perhaps you should let the boys know while I speak to her. I'll have to speak to Jasper after though... Bella had a, special, message for him."

"Of course, of course, I'll go get her now. The boys will be so relieved to know Bella is okay."

"Thank you my dear."

He placed the phone down and heard him walk from the room. I glanced round the empty house I was standing in and considered our conundrum. If we were planning on spending any time here I was going to have to re-decorate, we had donated everything we weren't taking with us when we left.

And maybe setting up our home again would give me something to occupy my mind with...

I heard the clickity clack of Rose's heels on the Denali's wooden floors and then the phone was picked up.

"Esme?" her voice was strained, nervous even, nothing like her usual self. "What's happened? Carlisle just said you need to speak to me."

"Rose, I'm in Forks", a whoosh of breath came across the phone.

"Are they...? Have you..?"

"No, I'm sorry my dear, they haven't been here."

"Oh", I could feel the desolation in her voice.

"I did find something... surprising... though."

She didn't say anything, obviously too upset at the news Edward and Alice were not here to play my game. My heart filled with love for her at that moment. I knew she had truly thought she was doing the right thing at the time, but I needed her to go over it again for me once more, to try and understand it with this new information.

"Rosalie, I need to ask you again what Edward said to you, was there anything you didn't expect? I've learnt some things and I need to work out what exactly happened, both last week and when we left Forks."

"What do you mean when we left Forks? You know exactly what happened Esme; Bella freaked out over what happened on her birthday and told Edward she didn't want to be with him anymore and it would be better if we left. It was shit but we did it and we've been over it a thousand times since then."

"Yes, I know. But it appears Edward wasn't telling us the whole truth."

"What do you mean? We all saw the state he was in when she left him."

"Yes... well... I'm not too sure about that anymore Rose. Bella didn't leave Edward; Edward left her."

There was no reaction from the other end of the phone.

I heard her sink into a chair and gave her a moment to collect herself.

"Bella didn't leave Edward?"

"No dear."

"Edward... Edward left Bella?"

"Yes dear."

"Well then why the fuck is he doing all this then? Why the fuck did he leave in the first place if he was the one that ended it?" she was ranting and raving, getting off a good deal of the tension I had felt within her over the past week. Eventually she seemed to calm down slightly. I allowed her to keep going, not even telling her off for her language, anger was an emotion that Rosalie could deal with, I knew it would give her purpose or nothing else"...how did you find out, Esme? Did Charlie tell you?"

This was the bit I was worried about...

"No, Charlie didn't tell me. Bella did."

"She's still alive?" I was surprised to hear relief in her voice.

"Yes, she is."

"But... but Alice saw her killing herself."

"Yes, well, we all know how Alice's visions never give the full picture... apparently she was cliff diving, everyone else was already in the water."

"Cliff diving?" there was laughter from the other end of the phone now and I couldn't help but relish in the sound, despite my shock at the reaction, "not something I ever expected Bella to try out..."

I laughed along with her but it was forced and we quickly died down.

"What are we going to do then, Esme? Are you staying there?"

"Yes, I think I am going to have to. What are you going to do dear? You are welcome to come here."

I paused, desperately hoping she would agree it was for the best, praying that she would come home.

"I want to Esme... I really do, but, if Edward and Alice aren't in Forks then someone needs to go to Italy and try and work out what happened to them. Carlisle trusts Aro but I'm not too sure and if they did leave there safely the trail will only be follow-able for another couple of days."

I shook my head but sighed in acceptance.

"If that's what you need to do my dear... but please, be careful. I can't lose any more of my children."

"I promise."Her voice was strong, determined and I smiled at the resilience of my baby girl.

I knew she meant it. My first daughter may be fickle and frequently self-centred but she never broke a promise.

"Thank you, dear. I love you."

"I love you too... mom."

I couldn't help but smile at that, Rose wasn't one for emotion and she rarely called me mom, it reminded her too much of what she had lost in this life.

"Can you go and get your brother for me, dear? I have a message from Bella for him."

"What?" he voice was suddenly like steel but I knew why. She didn't what Jasper to get Bella's message if it would hurt him anymore than he already was and I swelled with pride for her once again.

"It's ok darling, she just wanted me to let him know she doesn't blame him for what happened... apparently she never did."

"Oh", she sounded slightly embarrassed but I brushed it off.

"I think it's something he should hear, particularly if he is going to be coming here with Carlisle."

"Yes, yes, of course", she sounded deep in thought so I said a quick goodbye and she ran off to get Jasper.

I recognized his footsteps and he quickly grabbed the phone up.

"Bella's still alive?"

His voice was ecstatic, his usually hidden southern accent coming out and I couldn't help but suspect he was being affected by the emotions of the rest of the family – he always was.

"Yes, she's fine. She wanted me to pass a message to you."

"She did?" he didn't sound like his usual self, in fact he seemed almost giddy.

"Yes Jasper... I spoke to her about her birthday."

"Oh", his voice dropped several levels and I began to regret bringing it up but I knew he had to hear this, I knew that it would help him and there was no way I was going to let him continue to live with the guilt of Bella and Edward's break up on his shoulders.

"Don't worry, darling, she... she..." this was turning out harder than I had expected. I had been so pleased to have the message but now I felt I was opening a can of worms.

I had tried so hard to not mention that night, not to anyone, even Carlisle and I had only spoken of it briefly, and only just after it had happened. The only other time I had it was to Jasper, I needed him to know that I did not blame him, I was not angry, that I forgave him for losing control, like so many of us had in the past. Of course he had known, he had known that although I was not angry at him but I was incredibly disappointed, how could I not be? An attempt to take a human life is always frowned upon by the family; it's what we work so hard to prevent and the effects were so far reaching.

"How much did Carlisle speak to you about?"

He paused briefly before answering, "Just that she's alive... why? What else is there?"

Damn, I was hoping Carlisle had covered all of the Edward lying areas of the conversation, obviously he had not got to that part yet.

I paced briefly and I could hear him waiting, very patiently for an answer.

It took a minute or two but eventually I began rattling it all off.

"Jasper, Bella didn't split up with Edward", it didn't get any easier the more I said it, the pain from his lies, his betrayal of all of us cut up my soul, I took a inhaled deeply, anxiously trying to get enough air into my lungs to get it all out in one breath. I hope I don't have to do it for Emmett too... "Edward split up with her", sharp inhale of breath, this seems to be going the same way as the past two times I have done this. "He lied to us Jasper. I don't know why but he lied. Bella never asked us to leave and... and she wanted to me tell you, she never blamed you for what happened. In fact... I don't think she ever did."

I heard his body slide, hopefully onto a seat. I waited, both eager and dreading his reaction.

"She never asked us to leave? She never blamed me?"

His voice was unconvinced.

"No, we should have know really", I couldn't help but giggle again, with the childish behaviour, it was like I was reverting to a teenager, "Bella seems to be unlike any other human in existence."

He laughed with me, and it was a beautiful sound to hear. Deep and rumbling, coming from deep in his diaphragm.

"No, that girl is most definitely not like any other human I have met... "He paused, lost in thought and I let him adjust to the news I had just confronted him with. "I wish I could speak to her, have the chance to apologise."

"Maybe you will my dear, I think I am going to stay here... there are so many things to sort out. Carlisle is going to join me, perhaps you will too?"

"I..." his voice was nervous and I understood why. After Bella's birthday Jasper had not ventured near groups of humans again, he was too afraid of causing more problems. I wanted to reassure him, tell him he would be fine but I didn't want to push him, he would have to do this at his own pace. "I'll have to think about it, Esme."

It was the best I could hope for; maybe after a couple of days of hunting he would feel comfortable. Besides, I was most definitely not going to allow him to avoid the world forever. Maybe the temptation of being able to talk to Bella in person would be just the motivation he needed.

"That's the most I could hope for dear, but please remember that both Carlisle and I have faith in you, and so does Bella."

He didn't respond but I gave him some time to think, it wasn't as though I was worried about the phone bill. Eventually I heard Carlisle come back into the room and lightly take the phone away from Jasper who was too distracted to even say goodbye.

"I see Jasper has a lot to think about..." Carlisle's voice was the lightest I had heard it in a while and I gave a quick prayer of thanks. "I think we'll be coming down in a couple of days, you'll be okay until then?"

"Yes, yes, I'll be fine", I heard the usual reassurances pass through my lips before realising there was something I needed to worry about, in fact several of them by the smell of it.

"Carlisle?"

"Yes?"

"Out of interest... when was the last time you spoke to any of the Quilettes?"

He paused and thought for a moment, "Not since we moved back into the area three years ago, why?"

"Oh... well..."

"Esme!" his voice was tense.

"I think I smelt some of them round Bella's house..."

"What? Quilletes, or...?"

"Yes, or..." for some reason I was not inclined to say the word, despite our own supernatural origins the idea of saying werewolf. I think it was partly because I was aware from discussions with Carlisle that they were not in fact werewolves but shapeshifters and secondly because they were obviously watching Bella.

"In that case I think I should come tonight."

"No, no, that isn't necessary, it's better to wait and make sure Jasper is perfectly okay first, especially if..." I did not want to suggest that he may be a risk to the treaty.

"Yes, I think that's for the best. But you must promise me you will stay away from the border, you know where it is. Don't give them any reason to come near you; they must be young, very young, and very dangerous."

"I was there last time, remember?" I joked, but we both knew the danger the Quilletes could pose to us if angered.

"I know, I know. I better go... I think I can hear Jasper and Rosalie telling Emmett about Edward's _deception_, and, well it doesn't sound like it is going well." I heard a roar and then a loud crash down the phone and winced. I could only hope he hadn't destroyed anything too expensive.

"Please go stop him from destroying any more of the house; I don't think Tanya would be pleased to come back to her home in tatters."

"Of course darling, but I wouldn't worry too much at the moment, by the sounds of that it was Edward's piano that took the brunt of it. Jasper and Rose are taking him outside now", I tried to think positive but couldn't help but flashback to Emmett's newborn phase, the first time Rose had left him alone for any amount of time he had got so angry at us not allowing him to go find her he literally took the roof off. For such a loving man he could get a little bit uncontrollable when angry. I only hoped they could get him outside fast enough.

"I love you", his voice brought me back with a smile on my face.

"I love you too my dear, I'll speak to you tomorrow when everything has calmed down."

"Yes, yes, call me tomorrow I'll have my phone on me all day, goodnight Mrs Cullen."

"Goodnight, Dr Cullen."

I waited for him to hang up, it was childish but I couldn't help myself then turned to survey the house.

I was going to have a busy couple of days ahead of me if I was going to sort out this mess of a house. There was furniture to buy, I could maybe get some paint some for the wall, and I should really pick up some food in case Bella comes over.

I couldn't wait.

_A/N: Really hoping to get your opinions on this chapter guys, I had some problems getting Jasper's accent right and I want to know how I managed - I'm British and the only time I have been over the other side of the pond was when I went to Florida aged 10, so have no real base of reference. Again, totally blown away by all the story favorites and alerts but please, please leave me a review - I'm really enjoying hearing everyones guess about what is going to happen next, plus it makes me jump up and down in excitement whenever I open my email and see them :) _

_A/N2: After getting some advice from lanna-misssunshine and luvrofmusic I have changed Jasper's dialogue a bit, hope you like it x  
_


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: Wow, was totally blown away by the response I got for the last chapter, thank youso much guys! I know there are some of you I haven't responded to yet but it was better to get this out first and then I can work on thanking all you superstars for the love later this evening. _

_Once again, I am not SM, I just like to play with her characters. _

**5. Katherina**

_Bella_

My conversation with Jake had gone long into the night.

He had slipped into the wardrobe, a feat I hadn't believed was possible until I saw it, when Charlie had come upstairs, popping his head in to say goodnight before making his way into his own room. Jake waited until, not making a noise until Charlie's light snores permeated the house before coming out again and continuing with his inquisition. Eventually I had had to try and physically throw him out when the sun started to rise, filling the room with pale light, which also failed. Damn him and his ridiculous size.

To say he had been unhappy with the reappearance of the Cullens was a drastic understatement. He had been slightly placated by the fact that Edward was missing, a reaction I had been less than happy about, although not surprised by. But as soon as I had mentioned that Esme would soon be joined by Carlisle and Jasper, well, he exploded again and immediately insisted on leaving to tell Sam. I could barely contain my excitement at the idea of being able to sleep long enough to say goodbye. Unfortunately my mind did not seem to agree with my body. I lay awake for what seemed like hours, watching as more and more of the forest was lit in my window.

At some point I received a text from Jake to reassure me the house was still protected. But to be honest I sincerely doubted that Victoria would make an attempt if she smelt Esme around the house, she would know that I was no longer unprotected.

Unprotected.

Did I really feel that way about the wolves? Did I really feel protected by Esme? Well of course I did, she was a vampire after all, but the idea of her fighting, well it didn't sit particularly well with me.

"Shit!"

I sat bolt upright and then immediately back down, hearing Charlie move in the other room.

I hadn't told Esme about Victoria! I hadn't told her about the wolves, actually that one was probably for the best, I wouldn't want to offend the pack by revealing them to their mortal enemy, even if they were basically my family, but Victoria... I should have let her know. I grabbed my mobile and frantically searched through the numbers but it was yet another thing that Edward had gotten rid of in his departure. Damn him. Maybe I could go round tomorrow and let her know,

I flopped over with that thought in mind and began drifting off; the last thing I heard was howl, echoing into the night...

The next morning I was horribly stiff, having apparently having slept all night with my face in my pillow and arse in the air. I didn't bother to right myself though before tripping to the window and wrenching it open.

"Jake...?" I whispered hoping that he was not so far he couldn't hear me but when I heard the unmistakable sound of footsteps it was not him who walked out of the forest. It was Embry.

"Hey Bella", he moved to stand below my window, leaning nonchalantly against the house. I was glad he didn't try to come up the way Jake usually did.

"Hey Embry, just you last night?"

He laughed lightly, "Yeah, just me. You're little piece of news last night caused quite a stir, just so you know. I could hear them arguing all night", he tapped his head lightly and I couldn't help but smile. It was so easy with the pack, and I realised with a jolt that they were my family too. "Jake'll be back to speak to you in a couple of hours, Sam's coming with him."

I shivered slightly and Embry laughed. It was instinctual, I still wasn't entirely sure what I felt about Sam, despite knowing what had happened to Jake was not his fault I didn't like the way he had tried to prevent Jake telling me. I couldn't help but speculate on what other relationships he had forced a wedge on distrust in. They were all so estranged from their other friends now, I knew for a fact neither Jake or Embry had seen Quil in weeks, maybe even months now.

"He's not that bad Bells, give him a chance, you never know, you might even like him", his tone was teasing and wasn't helping in the slightest. I lightly threw a pencil that was sitting on my desk at his head as a sign of my frustration. It did no good, he didn't even look to grab it and throw it back through the window. "I better go, Charlie is coming upstairs and I don't want to start any rumours by talking to you out your window", he turned and winked before jogging at an inhuman pace back into the forest.

"Bella?" Charlie was knocking on the door and quickly opened it before he had the chance to.

"Morning dad!" he glanced into the room sheepishly as I grinned at him.

"You just up?" he was still glancing round the room, as though looking for something, "...thought I heard you talking to someone."

"Talking to someone?" damn, all this lying, I should at least be getting better at it. "Nope, it's just me up here", I opened my arms in, what was meant to be, a placating gesture.

"Oh... well, must just be getting old..." he shook his head in a similar way to Jake when he discussed the hive mind of the pack. I took his moment of reservation to grab my tooth and hair brush and waited to get passed him. He stepped back, just as I expected which effectively ended the conversation and, by extension any further lying, I still wasn't sure if he had heard me talking to Jake last night and didn't want to have to try and come up with an explanation.

"I'll be down for breakfast in ten minutes dad", I shouted back at I closed the bathroom door behind me and fell against it. I waited for the sound of him moving back down the stairs before turning on the faucet and splashing my face with water. When did my life become so filled with lies?

Pulling my hair up I quickly finished washing my face and brushed my teeth, followed by flossing before shuffling back to my room. My back still ached from my uncomfortable sleeping position so I began to systematically stretch my muscles. It took me by surprise to feel how aware I was of my body, like a part of me that I hadn't realised I had been missing was back, my body was my own again. Realizing I was wasting time and Charlie was waiting I put that thought to the back of my mind and looked into my cupboard and spotted a bag of clothes Renee had bought me when she had last visited and peeked in, I was pleasantly surprised. I grabbed a pair of new jeans, t-shirt and shirt before slipping on my old converse and running downstairs.

I was surprised to be greeted by the smell of eggs and bacon as I came downstairs, Charlie must be really worried about me to convince him to cook... or alternatively trying to kill me. Walking round the corner I could see him standing in the midst of several egg shells and blots of fat.

"Oh" he turned to face me with a sheepish expression on his face and I couldn't help but smile, "I was hoping to have this cleared up before you got down... I made breakfast!" the pride on his face prevented me from scolding him so instead I sat myself down at the table and waited.

Five minutes later a plate of rubbery eggs and burnt bacon appeared before me, I had been hoping he was going to disappear off fishing before I had to eat but he sat with me and I dutifully swallowed it all before shooing him out the house and insisting I did the dishes. It was nice to be able to relax around him and I got the feeling he could see the difference in me that I had been beginning to feel over the past couple of days, I felt like I was healing.

In the end I had to clean the whole room, including the walls he had made such a state but it didn't really bother me. I knew how much effort he had put it to cooking compared to his usual tea and toast. I thought about calling Embry in to find out if he wanted any of what remained in the pan but I didn't think even he would appreciate it. In the end I had to just throw away the rest of it and immediately took out the bag outside to get the burnt smell out the house then opened the window. An hour later I was all done and trudged up to my room to make an attempt at my calculus homework.

Another hour later and I still hadn't made any progress and was considering calling Angela for help when the doorbell went.

After my surprise visit last night I was cautious about opening the door but quickly relaxed when Jakes voice came echoing through the post box.

"BELLS! Hurry up and open the door!"

I bounded towards it at the sound of his voice and threw open the door only to be stopped in my track by Sam's large form. Shit, I had forgotten he was coming too...

"Oh, hi Jake, Sam," I nodded slightly in his direction.

"Hello Bella, it's good to see you again", I glanced up at Sam and nodded before stepping out the way and letting the two of them in. Jake's face was like thunder and I suddenly remembered the howl I had heard last night, had it come from him?

I followed the two of them through to the living room where Jake immediately threw himself on to the sofa before standing up with his fingers pinching his nose, a look of disgust on his face.

"You were sitting on the sofa with it?"

I couldn't help but snap, "She's called Esme, not _it_, Jacob Black."

He shrunk slightly at my wrath but it didn't stop him making a face before talking Charlie's usual chair.

"It does smell kinda bad in here, Bella", he was speaking to me but Sam's eyes were hard in Jacob and I couldn't help but wonder why they were here.

I shrugged and dropped myself down on the vacated sofa, it smelt fine to me.

Sam pulled a chair from the lonely writing desk into the middle of the room and sat, looking at both Jake and I, his eyebrows knitted together and muscles tensed. I had a distinct feeling I wasn't going to like what was going to happen.

"Bella, Jacob informed me that one of the Cullen's has returned to the area, and that you have had contact with, um, her", it surprised me but I appreciated his effort not to say anything offensive about Esme in my presence. Maybe Embry was right and he wasn't so bad after all. My reaction changed when he started speaking again. "I need to ask you what was discussed."

I blanched at that one, telling Jake what me and Esme had discussed was one thing, he was my best friend, I didn't hide anything from him and he didn't hide anything from me. We had promised one another. But discussing my conversation with Esme with Sam, that was different. He must have seen my apprehension though because he immediately backtracked.

"I don't expect you to tell me what was private between the two of you", I nodded, unsure of where he was going. Wasn't all of our conversation personal and therefore private? "It would just be... useful... to know what was discussed, how many of them will be returning? How long will they be staying? Did you talk about the pack? Did you talk about the other one, the red head?"

I sat there as he threw question after question at me and suddenly understood why he was Alpha. Despite the fact I was not in the pack and therefore did not have to answer him I felt compelled to tell him what he wanted to know, he was almost mesmerising in his intensity and before I knew it answers were flying out my mouth.

"Not all of them are coming back, I'm sure Jake told you Edward and Alice are missing and Rosalie and Emmett are off to Europe to try and find them so it'll just be Esme, Carlisle and Jasper coming back... although I imagine the others will join them at some point. I don't know how long they will be here, could be anything from a couple of days to years, I guess you would have to ask them about that. I didn't talk about the pack, or Victoria, I never got the chance and I really want to warn Esme there's a rogue vampire on the loose..."

Jake guffawed and I glared at him.

"Sorry... it's just the idea of having to warn a leech about another leech..." I glared but when Sam glanced towards him he quickly shut up.

"You didn't mention us?" Sam turned back to me, his whole demeanour still serious.

"Well, I mentioned Jake and La Push but not... you know..."

"Not like she won't have been able to tell, we've been all over Bella's house for weeks. If we can smell her I am willing to bet you she can smell us."

"Hmmm... that's probably true. You didn't mention our problem to her then?"

"No, but as I said I think I should. What if she goes after Esme?" my body trembled at the thought of it.

"Better one of them than one of us", Jake muttered but Sam ignored him.

"Bella, I have a favour I would like to ask you", serious Sam was looking at me again but I wasn't going to fall for that again. There was no way I was agreeing to anything without knowing what it was so I kept my eyes on the floor, unwilling to be sucked in again.

"That depends, Sam, what do you want me to do?"

He nodded and then fell into thought.

"Bella, I realise you have a special relationship with the Cullens, one I entirely fail to understand and I was wondering if you would allow me to, use, that relationship for the good of the pack."

No, I definitely didn't like the sound of this.

"What exactly are you asking Sam?"

He sighed and looked briefly at Jake, who glared back angrily, before turning to me again.

"I was hoping you could orchestrate a meeting Bella, between the Pack and the Cullens."

Now that surprised me, I had been expecting spying, espionage, being a go between for them seemed positively easy in comparison.

"Of course Sam, I'd be happy to", Jake threw his head into his hands and I suddenly understood why he was so upset. He hadn't been happy about the idea of me spending time with the Cullen's anyway and now his Alpha was asking me to contact them.

"I'm sorry Jacob", Sam turned to him, "You know I had to ask, it is better for all of us if Bella is there to facilitate the discussions", Jake just buried his head further into a pillow.

"Jake", I moved next to him and put my hand lightly on his shoulder. Sam watched us with interest. "I know you aren't happy about this but the Cullen's aren't dangerous. I spent a whole six months with them and no one drank my blood once. Besides, I'll be spending time with them anyway, maybe it would make you feel better to see them around me", I looked up at Sam and he nodded.

"Mmmummrruph", I assumed that meant ok and sat back down, looking at Sam again.

"Esme is the only one there at the moment..."

"Obviously we will not expect her to meet us alone", I couldn't help but smile that Sam's chivalry seemed to extend, at least to some extent, even to vampires. "We will wait until her mate and son return and then I would appreciate if you would call them and organise a meet somewhere on the border. There will only be three of them so there will only be three of us", Jake growled again and Sam looked round at him "it would be rude for us to outnumber them when our intentions are friendly. I would appreciate if you would ensure them of that by the way", his eyes were back on me and I nodded mutely.

"Good, well I better be getting back. I need to discuss this with everyone else. Jake", he glanced round at him but he still had his face in the pillow. "I take it you will be staying to keep an eye on Bella", I noticed how it sounded like an offer but with the tone of his voice it still came across as an order. Another muffled noise came from the pillow but Sam seemed content with it and with a nod of his head let himself out.

I heard the door shut quietly and stood, waiting for the werewolf on in my living room to say something, but he didn't move.

"Jake?"

I waited again but he was still as stone.

"Jacob?"

Slightly sterner this time but there was still no reaction from him.

"Jacob Black?"

A small snore escaped from between his face and the cushion.

Typical.

I stood up and went over, touching him lightly on the shoulder.

"Dnnnn...wnnnnnaa...lemmealone."

"Don't worry Jake, just stay there", I looked down at him and he rolled over, his eyes closed and mouth slightly open. He looked like a child when he was asleep, it was one of the few times I could still appreciate the fact the he was a year younger than me. I lightly pulled a stray piece of hair back into place and then stopped and stepped back. I had made my decision and that was most definitely not in the job description. Chastising myself I ran upstairs and grabbed my calculus along with a spare blanket for Jake and headed back downstairs for him to wake up.

Morning had slunk into afternoon and was on it's way to evening when Jake finally jumped awake.

He cracked his neck loudly as he stood and I couldn't help but wince at the sound.

"Jeez Bells, you couldn't have found me somewhere more comfortable to sleep."

I turned to look at him and couldn't help but laugh. He was still seated with the pale pink blanket I had grabbed for him round his ankles and a cushion sticking to his face.

"And how exactly was I meant to move you Jake? A winch, perhaps?"

"True, but you could've woken me. Maybe lent me a bed..."

"Yeah, I'm surely Charlie would've been overjoyed to come back and find you taking a kip."

"Bah, he wouldn't have cared", he boasted but he couldn't hide a hint of relief, we both knew exactly what he would think if he came back to Jake in my bed, or worse his. I finished off the last of my biology homework for the week as he tried to disentangle himself from the covers before folding them into a loose bundle and chucking them on the sofa.

"So... you got anything for breakfast around here?" his eyes roamed in the direction of the kitchen.

"You're a couple of hours late for that but," I glanced at the clock. Twenty five past six, Charlie had aimed to be back by seven so I had just enough time to make lasagne with salad and garlic bread. That should satisfy even Jake's massive stomach. "I take it you're staying for dinner."

"Well I could never refuse the offer, good woman", he bowed deeply and I stood up to swat at him.

"C'mon... you can help me cut the vegetables."

It didn't take me long to find all the necessary items in the fridge and set Jake to work cutting the onions then leeks, mushrooms and peppers while I crushed some garlic and began everything into a pan. We settled into a comfortable silence until I started on the cheese sauce. I was just trying to add the milk to get the right consistency when he spoke from directly behind me.

"You know you don't have to do what Sam asked..." I turned to look at him and he slunk back, he could obviously tell by the look on my face I had not wanted it to be brought up. "You know, not if you don't want to..."

"And why would I not want to Jake? The Cullens are my family, despite the fact that I'm not with Edward anymore and so are the pack. It's in my interests for all of you to get along", I stuck my tongue out and he nodded, and smiled slightly at the fact I had referred to the pack as family before he caught up with himself and his face sank again. I went back to the sauce and just about had it finished when the phone began to ring shrilly. Jake went for it like he was going to answer it again but I batted his hand away and told him curtly to start putting everything in the lasagne bowl before picking up the phone. I may love him but it was a bit too familiar for him to be answering the phone, particularly when I was right there.

"Swan residence."

"Bella", Carlisle's crystal clear voice came from down the phone and Jake winced slightly but continued placing his pasta sheets. "It's good to hear your voice."

"Hi Carlisle, I was just wondering how I could get in contact with you."

"Yes, I wasn't sure if you would have any of our numbers anymore. I just arrived in Forks with Jasper and was wondering if I could organise a meeting with you. Apparently we have a lot to talk about", I wondered what exactly Carlisle wanted to talk to me about with a shudder, surely he didn't expect me to talk about Edward leaving, about everything that had happened since. Maybe this was the best point to change the direction of the conversation...

"Actually, as much as I would like that there are a couple of other people who would like to meet with you", he didn't say anything so I kept going. "See I've been spending a lot of time at La Push recently and a couple of my friends were wondering if they could meet you to discuss the, uh, treaty, with you." I waited with bated breath, hoping I had not overstepped any boundaries by asking him, I honestly hadn't been sure how to go about it at all and as it was I had not been quick enough to think of anything better.

"Why of course, Bella, we are always available should any of the, uh, pack need to speak to us. I was not aware you were so involved with them", his voice was slightly anxious but he then laughed. "You certainly are a danger magnet aren't you?"

"It would appear so..." I couldn't really think of what else to say. I was more than aware of how Jake felt about the Cullens and had almost expected the same reaction towards the wolves from them. I suddenly realised how stupid that was, I doubted Carlisle had ever met anyone who he had instantly disliked. and the wolves were protectors of the people from the Reservation and the town, he would have nothing against them, of that I was suddenly certain.

"I can make myself available tonight if that is suitable, I don't know if you want to contact anyone and check..."

"That won't be necessary, Jacob Black is with me now, I'm sure he can let me know", I put my hand over the receiver and glanced at the large boy who was currently violently throwing my perfectly made lasagne in the oven. He glanced up and nodded at me, he could obviously hear Carlisle. "Yeah, tonight should be fine. I think Sam wanted to meet somewhere on the border, I'm not too sure where that is though..."

"Not to worry Bella, I am well aware of the boundary line, I will be a couple of miles west of it at the highway this evening at say, midnight?"

"Ummm..." this was the bit I was worried about, I wanted to be able to come to the meeting to ensure that everyone was safe. Would I have time to sneak out if we met at twelve? "Can we make it a little bit later Carlisle? Say one? I need to make sure Charlie is asleep before I can get out the house."

"Oh yes, of course dear, I hadn't been sure you would be joining us. One will be fine."

"Thank you. I also thought you should know Sam is aware there are only three of you so he said he would only bring two more wolves along with him."

"Ah, yes, I see. Bella, I just wanted to check. Is Sam the Alpha? Not the descendent of Ephraim Black?"

"No, Jake isn't the Alpha, Sam is older, he was the first to turn", I saw Jake zip his mouth and realised I was giving away more than he was happy about.

"Ah, well that makes sense. I would be happy to meet you and them. I best go, I should warn Jasper and Esme of our evening plans. They will be excited to see you."

"And I them, I better let the wolves know too. I'll see you tonight Carlisle."

"Goodbye, Bella", and then the he was gone.

I turned to Jake, he didn't look as upset as I had suspected.

"I better go Bells, I need to let Sam know the meeting is tonight", he looked longingly at the oven quickly before giving me a quick one handed hug and running out the door. I was left yelling "goodbye" to his retreating back.

Great, now what was I going to do? That lasagne is huge and there is now way Charlie and I can eat it all. And on top of that I was going to have to have a nap before I went out tonight or I was going to be a mess tomorrow. My life was turning out to be none stop. I should probably shower before dinner as well, just to be sure I could get it done, so I ran upstairs while the lasagne bubbled away. At this rate I was never going to get a full night's sleep again.

_A/N: So, love it? Hate it? Leave me a review and let me know what you think, it makes me go 'squee' everytime I see my inbox. Aiming to get the next chapter up by Saturday_ _for y'all :)_


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: Apologies to everyone I told I would have this out by yesterday to, I completely forgot that I had a conference to be at and I just didn't have time. Hopefully the chapters makes it up to you. _

**6. Theseus**

_Carlisle_

It may have been a family record but I was still disappointed at how long it had taken us to get out of Denali and on our way here. After our very revealing conversation with Esme we had all immediately started getting ready to depart. Rosalie and Emmett had booked flights to Bologna and were planning to drive the rest of the way to Volterra once they got there; they had left just before us and planned to buy any clothes they needed when they got there, rather than bothering with luggage. In the meantime Jasper and I had hastily packed a few essentials, made our quick goodbyes and were soon out the door as well.

We were less than an hour away from Forks now; the drive that should have taken two and a half days had taken us only eight hours so far and I hoped our luck would hold out for the rest of the journey. I had been making sure to use my senses to their full in order to divert us around any traffic or police.

I was more than a little bit anxious to get to Esme. She was a delicate soul in many ways and I knew how badly she had taken Bella's supposed death, a painful reminder of the child she had lost many years before, and I wanted to be there to comfort her should she need it. I was also more than a little bit concerned about the reappearance of the wolves, although I had spoken to Billy Black, the heir of Ephraim Black when we moved back into the area a couple of years ago and he had agreed to the old terms. Now however there was a possibility of that changing, now they had the means the get rid of us. I could only hope they could see, as their ancestors had, that we do not want to hurt anyone, despite our base nature.

I glanced quickly at the gas as we passed a petrol station by Lake Crescent but decided against stopping; if I conserved what we had left, we should just make it, even if we had to run the last little bit.

I turned to look at Jasper, who sat next to me his eyes staring blankly towards the horizon. I knew better than to address him. Unlike Esme I was not entirely sure it was good for Jasper to be returning to Forks at all, despite the message Bella had sent him. The past months had been difficult on everyone but had been affected Jasper the worse. When Edward had still been staying with us Jasper had barely been able to stay in the same house as us, Edward's pain, guilt and I suspected anger had kept him at bay. Even after Edward's departure, only two weeks after our arrival at Denali, he had still found it difficult. Of course we were the cause, everyone else had been too wrapped up in their own pain over the situation they had not thought of the fact he would feel everything they did, would be forced to carry their burden also.

As if all of that wasn't enough Jasper had also taken the majority of the blame for the situation, his repeated apologies to Edward had fallen on deaf ears although he continued to try until eventually Edward had snapped and left, leaving Jasper with yet another thing he could blame on himself. None of us had wanted to attribute what had happened to him, but in our own ways we had all felt the pressure of the last few months.

Rose had been most vocal on it, although the frustration she felt at Jasper was nothing compared with her anger at Bella for, as she put it, 'forcing us out of our home', she had moped for an appropriate amount of time and then tried to move on. Then again, it had also been Rose who had insisted we keep doing things, she had literally carried a very uncooperative Esme out the house when she wanted to go shopping. She had sat with Jasper, not saying anything but giving him support nonetheless, she has also dragged him out to hunt with the help of Emmett when he left too long between hunts. She had even changed the address for all my journal subscriptions. Not that any of us had appreciated it at the time; everything had been done in her usual bossy and demanding way, she had told me I was an idiot for not remembering to have everything forwarded.

Emmett loved his brother dearly but he was also distraught over the thought that Bella had sent him away. He adored her, that much was obvious, and it had been wonderful to watch the two of them goof around. He had once told me that she reminded him of his little sister from his human life, one of his few distinct memories from before the change. He had felt her dismissal of him greatly. But he also understood Jasper's dilemma, Emmett had made mistakes in the past and did not want be angry at him. The whole situation was messy.

Alice had been the worst, for Jasper at any rate, it wasn't that she seemed upset by the fact we moved, in fact she seemed not to care that we had left Forks and Bella at all, only saying it was 'for the best'. But it seemed to me, as an outsider, that she had left behind her relationship with Jasper as well. I had seen them together many times, both in silence, he would sit miserably, occasionally looking to her as a source of comfort but she did not seem aware of it, instead sitting with her head deep in visions, apparently trying to get information on either Bella or Edward.

And then she had simply, disappeared, leaving us a note to explain that Bella was going to kill herself and she, despite the fact she was too late to stop it, was going to go to Forks and attempt to comfort Charlie. He had barely reacted when I told him about Alice's departure, Bella's death, the only change being an instant change in eye colour, they instantly went from golden to black. It had been disturbing to say the least, I had never seen a vampire react like that before. He had simply sat, not moving from the position he had been in before until I had been forced to basically order him out to hunt with Emmett and I, it was the only thing I could think to do.

Maybe getting Jasper out was for the best... Bella has always been easy to be around and with less people to worry about he might be able come out of his depression. It was sad to say that being on the phone to Esme earlier was the most animated he had been in a long time and I suspected that it had been due to the mood of joy in the family at that moment, rather than of his own volition.

I glanced at him once more, his eyes still unfocused, his hair matted as though he hadn't brushed it in days. I realised with a start that at least this eyes were gold again, even after hunting repeatedly they had not changed back before but now... I couldn't help but wonder when it had happened, I thought about asking but decided against it. I was proud of him for how well he was doing and tried to show his that with my emotions. He glanced at me quickly and I smiled at him but he quickly turned away. He did not say anything for the rest of the journey and neither did I.

Esme was standing by the door as we pulled up the driveway and I stopped short of the garage to jump out and wrap my arms around her. My thoughts on the drive, and her disappearance 48 hours before, had only made me appreciate her more and I smelt her soft, golden hair lightly and was enveloped with the familiar scent of honey, almonds and cinnamon.

"Hello, Dr Cullen", her breath tickled my ear and I kissed her on the cheek lightly before pulling her back to see all of her.

"Hello, Mrs Cullen. I've missed you."

"And I you..."

I heard the car door slam and then Jasper was beside us.

"Hello Esme", he kissed her on the cheek and couldn't help but be slightly jealous that he seemed perfectly capable of talking to her but had not said a word to me for the entire drive here.

"Jasper, I'm so glad you're here", she smiled and slipped her hand into mine, keeping her other on Jasper's shoulder. "You two were quicker than I expected, I didn't think it could possibly be you when I heard the car come off the highway. Did you leave as soon as I got off the phone to you?"

"Nearly", I laughed and pulled her towards me once again. "I think we were all feeling so useless up there while you were busy down here that we all decided the only thing to do was get moving as soon as possible."

"Well I'm glad you are here, let's get the stuff in and we can work out what to do next. I think you'll need to call Bella... I think it would be good idea for us all to have a proper chat with her about what happened when we left," I nodded in agreement.

"I can get everythin' in", Jasper's almost monotonic voice came out from beside us and he walked back to the call, slipping into the driver's seat.

Esme pulled me inside and frowned slightly but I shook my head. I was worried about him too but he would be mortified to hear us discussing him when he was just outside the door.

"It's half seven Carlisle, if you want to talk to Bella you should probably do it soon. I don't think Charlie is particularly happy with us returning, although he hid it well last night. If you do it now you might be able to get her before he gets home."

I turned to her and nodded, I had been hoping we would get some time alone before setting everything back in motion here, I did not know when we would be able to again but she was right, as always, it was important to speak to Bella when she didn't need to monitor her words.

"I set up the basics in your study today, there's a phone, desk, computer and some of your books up there already", I tried to thank her but she held up her hand and then kissed me in a way she would never have done if the children were around, pulling me close to her. "Go, talk to Bella and let's start sorting this family out."

She was out the door helping Jasper seconds later and I began to make my way upstairs and down the hall to my familiar study.

I glanced round and couldn't help but be impressed with Esme's quick work, everything seemed ready, other than the fact my father's cross and my paintings were not here yet and I could feel their absence acutely, the rest of the room was all set up. I sat down quickly, eager to get this over with, I was not sure what I would say to Bella, should I apologise? And if I did for who? I know I felt horrible about leaving her but I believe it had been her choice. I thought of apologising for Edward but decided against it. That was not something I needed to do now. I pulled over the phone towards me nervously. Despite the fact I had never called the Swan residence before I knew the number from seeing Edward call so many times so I picked up and began to dial, hoping she would be happy to hear from me.

I was starting to think she wasn't there when I heard the click of the receiver being picked up and her soft voice.

"Swan residence", I suppressed a laugh at how grown-up she sounded, before realising we had been away for a number of months and of course she would have matured during that time, we had no idea what she had been forced to deal with.

"Bella", I was shocked by how relieved I was to be speaking to her. In the couple of months she had been with Edward Bella had got closer to us, to me, than any other human had in over three hundred years. I couldn't feel guilty for disobeying Edward by coming to her, I could only hope she needed us as much as it appeared we needed her. "It's good to hear your voice."

"Hi Carlisle, I was just wondering how to get in contact with you."

Wondering how to contact us? Then it hit me, Edward had insisted we change our numbers when we left, apparently Bella's idea, but as he had left her, not the other way round, he probably wouldn't want her trying to get in contact to let us know what had really happened.

Damn, I truly didn't know whether I would hug him or yell when I saw him again, if I saw him again.

"Yes, I wasn't sure if you would have any of our numbers anymore." I hoped she would understand, "I just arrived in Forks with Jasper and was wondering if I could organise a meeting with you", I hoped this would be ok with her. I could understand entirely why she wouldn't want us around, after thinking we had deserted her without saying goodbye but apparently she had been pleased to see Esme, I could only hope she felt the same way about the rest of us. "Apparently we have a lot to talk about."

She didn't say anything for a second so I gave her a human moment, I often forgot that their minds didn't work quite as fast as ours...

"Actually", she sounded slightly apprehensive but I had to assume that was just at the thought of seeing us. I didn't want to have to pressure her to meet us though so could only hope she would agree by herself. "As much as I would like to there are a couple of other people who would like to meet with you", well that was interesting although made a lot of sense. Esme had mentioned the scent of the wolves around the house. I couldn't help but wonder if she had started spending time with them as well. "See I've been spending a lot of time at La Push recently", just as I suspected. "And a couple of my friends were wondering if they could meet you to discuss the, uh, treaty... with you."

Interesting, apparently she had managed to join the fold of the wolves as easily as she had us.

"Well of course, Bella, we are always available should any of the pack need to speak to us. I was not aware you were so, involved with them", then again I really should have expected it. Bella would never think of the threat anyone she cared for could pose to her. "You certainly are a danger magnet aren't you?"

"It would appear so..." her voice was still nervous, as though expecting me to reprimand her, and I realised with a start that Edward probably would have and felt guilty. It was as though I was seeing my son for the first time and I wasn't entirely happy with what I saw, hell he once told her off for getting too close to the hob.

"I can make myself available tonight if that is suitable, I don't know if you want to contact anyone and check..."

"That won't be necessary, Jacob Black is with me now", that would explain the movement in the background. Typical Bella, not only is she friends with vampires but also the head of an ancient race of shape-shifters. "I'm sure he can let me know... Yeah, tonight should be fine. I think Sam wanted to meet somewhere on the border, I'm not too sure where that is though..."

Sam? Shouldn't the Black boy be making the arrangement... maybe the hierarchy of the tribe had changed since we last spoke to them.

"Not to worry Bella, I am well aware of the boundary line, I will be a couple of miles west of the highway at the boundary this evening at say, midnight?" I was going to need a couple of hours to prepare. I wanted to go over the old treaty, just in case the new generation had any problem with us. Although I doubted that would be the case if Bella was making the arrangements.

"Ummm... can we make it a little bit later Carlisle? Say one? I need to make sure Charlie is asleep before I can get out the house", hmmm... well I could say something about that, sneaking out her house in the middle of the night. To be honest I hadn't expected her to come, but of course Bella wanted to be there to make sure everyone got along.

"Oh yes, of course dear, I hadn't realised you would be joining us. One will be fine."

"Thank you", she sounded relieved, "I also thought you should know Sam is aware there are only three of you so he said he would only bring two more wolves along with him", well that was interesting. Last time we had been here there had only been three wolves, had their numbers increased? And how quickly must it have happened? I had not been aware of any of the tribe having had the ability when we left...

"Ah, yes, I see. Bella, I just wanted to check. Is Sam the Alpha? Not the descendent of Ephraim Black?" I didn't want to make any faux pas later tonight, it was better to ask now than risk offending anyone.

"No, Jake isn't the Alpha, Sam is older, he was the first to turn", well that made sense. Maybe the Black boy wasn't controlled enough yet, wonderful and he was in Bella's kitchen.

"Ah, well that makes sense. I would be happy to meet you and them. I best go, I should warn Jasper and Esme of our evening plans. They will be excited to see you."

"And I them, I better let the wolves know too. I'll see you tonight Carlisle."

"Goodbye, Bella", I hung up quickly. I had a lot to do this evening and I imagine Bella was the same.

I sat in the study for a couple of minutes, trying to gather my thoughts before making my way downstairs. Apparently Esme and Jasper had been as busy as I, the living room was nearly back to normal with two sofas sitting opposite one another and a couple of paintings we had left in storage up here back on the walls. It was lovely.

"Wow, you guys have been busy."

Esme turned round and grinned widely.

"Well I was kind of hoping we might have a guest soon... what did she say?"

The two of them stopped and looked at me, even Jasper who had seemed so distant lately was looking at me with genuine interest.

"Well... it wasn't quite the conversation I was expecting", they looked at me with concern, their expressions almost comically identical. "We will be seeing Bella later tonight, but I don't think we will have the chance to discuss much with her. Apparently you were right Esme, she has become friends with the wolves. We're meeting them all tonight to discuss the treaty, although I doubt it can be anything bad if Bella is going to be there."

"What do you mean Bella is gunna to be there? Bella is hangin' out with wolves now?" Jaspers voice raised slightly, showing some of the first emotions I had heard from him in months. "Doesn't she know how dangerous they are?"

"I am sure Bella is more than aware of how dangerous the wolves can be Jasper, especially when they are so young, just as she is aware of how dangerous we can be", he glared at me slightly but I continued on. "Bella has always been incredibly trusting and I think we should look at that as a good thing. Our relationship with the Quilettes has always been strained, maybe now we have a mutual friend it will make things easier", Jasper was still scowling but didn't say anything further. Esme put an arm around him and he looked up at her, almost as though surprised by her concern.

"Well... I'll leave you two to it, I need to go find the original treaty, I think it might be useful to have our copy tonight."

"There's a copy of the treaty?" Jasper looked at me surprised. I had almost forgotten he and Alice had not been here when we first wrote it.

"Yes, it's buried a distance from the house. I thought it would be useful should we ever return. Indeed I met with Billy Black when we returned in 2003 and showed him it to assuage his fears about us being in the area."

He looked deeply at me but didn't say anything so I made my way out the back door and made my way to the edge of the forest and over the river. I knew the exact spot I had buried the treaty, a couple of hundred metres southwest of the house but I wasn't in any rush so I began to walk slowly through the darkening forest.

I could still remember perfectly the first time we had met the wolves; it had been a night very like this.

_It was 1936, Emmett was only a year into his new life so we had chosen Hoquaim, Washington as our new home. The poor weather in the area meant it was sparsely inhabited and the Olympic Range was a perfect for hunting. It was only our third hunting trip since we had arrived and had decided to extend our range further towards the west coast, we had carefully avoided the small lumber town of Forks and planned to stop long before we arrived at the Quilette reservation. _

_Esme and Rosalie had not joined us and when Edward and Emmett sensed a bear nearby the two of them had run off leaving me alone. I was not concerned, Edward was perfectly capable of keeping his new brother in line and it meant I could go look for some deer without the two of them complaining about my poor taste in food. _

_I had just taken down a young buck when I sensed them behind me. _

_I dropped the deer quickly and slowly turned to face the visitors. Their smell was overpowering, earthy and rancid and entirely unappetising. It was a scent I had never smelt before but it screamed danger to me so I kept my eyes and arms low as I turned to face them. _

_I could only see two sets of four massive paws in my line of vision and I jumped. I had heard of werewolves during my time with the Volturi and knew they were one of the few creatures that could take down a vampire, at the same time though my rational mind was telling me it was not a full moon tonight, these were something else. _

_I risked a quick glance up, hoping whatever they were would not notice and be offended by my actions. The wolves were massive, easily as large as horses and they did not look happy to see me. The fact they had not attacked yet was miraculous, I could only assume it was in responsive to my submissive posture. I had hoped I would not be forced to fight them, I did not relish in the idea of killing anyone, and with two against one there was a probability they would kill me first. _

'_Edward'_

_I called out as loud as I could, hoping he was close enough to hear me. _

_His ability would be more than helpful at the moment, I had no idea what to do other than make myself look small so I slowly lowered myself to my knees and placed my hands in front of me. I listened carefully over the sounds of panting and pounding heartbeats for my sons in the forest and could hear them moving towards me quickly. _

'_Don't scare them when you enter the clearing, I do not want to fight them'_

_I heard the two of them slow down and moments later they walked through the trees behind me, a took the chance to glance and saw their bodies mimicked mine, although Emmett looked less than happy about it. _

'_Can you get a read on them?'_

_I glanced at Edward who was now on my left and he nodded lightly. _

"_They don't know what to think of us, they know what we are but they don't understand what you were doing when they found you", his voice was low but I heard them both growl lowly. Then the trees at the opposite end of the clearing moved slightly and a tall, muscular man emerged from them. He was obviously native, his skin was dark and his nose long and straight with eyes that seemed to belong on a much older man than the one before us. He was naked apart from a thin strip of fabric round his waist but the most shocking thing about him was the aura of power he gave out. _

"_The boy is right", his voice filled the clearing, "we are well aware of what you are, cold ones, we began following your scent as soon as you entered our territory."_

"_I apologise", I slowly rose from my position on my knees and looked up and into his dark eyes. "We were not aware we were encroaching on your land."_

"_Obviously", his voice was hard and I lowered my eyes once more. "He is also right that we are intrigued. It has been many years since a blood drinker has come through here but there is no doubt you are different from them. Show me your eyes again, leader."_

_I assumed that meant me and I looked up at him once again. This time I did not lower them and he looked at me speculatively. _

"_You're eyes are not the same as the others, why?"_

"_It is our, diet, we do not feed on humans", I waited for their reaction and it was as I suspected. He looked at us incredulously. "We feed on animals instead. That is why we are here, we are hunting."_

_I hoped that would answer all questions he could have about us and I saw Edward tilt his head approvingly. _

"_You have never fed on humans?" I nodded quickly and hoped he would not think to ask the other two. "You have given me much to ponder pale one. It goes against all I know but I will let you leave this place. We will meet again seven days from now, until then you will not enter our lands again, we will mark the boundaries."_

"_Thank you", I held his eye contacted and he looked deeply at me once more. _

"_I am Ephraim Black, leader of the Quilette tribe. This", he motioned at the large black wolf to his right, "is Levi Uley and Quil Ateara", the rich brown to his left. _

_I nodded to the two of them, but they did not move from their protective positions. _

"_I am Carlisle Cullen, these are my sons Edward and Emmett", the two boys nodded respectfully. "My wife and daughter are at our home in Hoquaim."_

_Ephraim Black looked slightly surprised but nodded. _

"_You will leave now. You will not hunt in our lands and trust me..." his voice darkened, "if I hear of anyone missing from the local area we will be coming for you. Until we meet again Carlisle Cullen, animal drinker."_

_I nodded quickly and then pushing Edward and Emmett ahead of me we ran back as fast as we could. We could sense them behind us for several hundred metres and it only spurned us on faster until eventually they stopped and we left their territory. _

_When we had met the following week they had written two copies of the treaty, which were signed before we left and we had simply avoided them since._

I had been so distracted by my thoughts I had reached the incline where the treaty was hidden, collect it and begin returning home without even thinking. I jumped over the river once more and could hear Esme bustling round the kitchen. I could also smell the unappetising aroma of human food.

"You know we aren't having Bella and the pack round for dinner, Esme" I stuck my head through the door and she poked her tongue out at me.

"I know but it is awful late, I was worried they would get hungry so I made some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and hot chocolate", she stepped forward and I noticed the massive pile of sandwiches behind her alongside several huge thermos. I couldn't help laugh at how pleased she looked.

"Well you're right on time, if we leave now we can all hunt before the meet."

"Perfect," her cheeks dimpled with the forced of her smile. "You go get Jasper, I think he's upstairs. I'll pack these up and then we can go ok."

Her enthusiasm picked me up and I grinned at her, goofily, before pulling her into my arms once more. It had been hell being away from her, it would not happen again if I had anything to say about it. She swatted me away, still grinning and I turned and made my way through the house, listening for Jasper.

I didn't pick up on him until I was halfway up the stairs, he was in the room he shared with Alice. He wasn't moving, I could only hear the whisper of a shallow breath every minute or so.

The door was open when I reached it and I looked in. He was sitting on the floor, although the bed was still there. The rest of the room was bare though, all his books gone along with Alice's magazines and various pieces of artwork. He didn't seem to notice me, his gaze directed at the eastern wall, which I knew housed Alice's massive closet. I glanced at it as I walked into the room, stripped bare as much of the rest of the house was.

"Jasper", I waited but he didn't respond to my voice, just continued looking at the empty closet as though it was of vital importance to him.

I moved closer and lowered myself towards him, but still keeping a respectable distance. His muscles were clenched and I could see a hardness around his jaw. His eyes were still on the vast, empty closet in front of him.

"Jasper", his eyes turned to me. "We need to go, we are meeting Bella and the pack at one. I want us to hunt before then."

"Of course, Carlisle", he stood up fluidly and even with my speed and balance I felt clumsy next to him. I looked at him, again. His eyes were dark which was generally a bad sign but he didn't seem agitated. In fact if anything he seemed more controlled now than he had been before. It was a relief and a worry to see how aware he was now, then again anything was better than the emptiness that had been staring at me before.

"Well then", I bumbled a bit, unsure of what to think of this dramatic change. After being so listless for so long seeing him this way was, disconcerting, to say the least. "Let's go", I walked out the door and felt him right behind me. Whatever had happened in that room had changed something, I just couldn't work out what.

_A/N: Just want to thank everyone again for all the support I've been getting, it's unbelieveable. I know its a hassle but make me really happy and press that little button, it'll only take you a minute and I am going to try and get a teaser out to everyone who does :D_


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: Wow, truly cannot believe the reviews I got for the last chapter - you guys are amazing! I've enjoyed hearing from all of you so much. This chapter is dedicated to my two new favourite people; heavyinfinity and Nissa-Cullen who fixed this up for me and made it beautiful - you guys are the best :) _

_Anyway, to reiterate, I'm not SM, and now, on with the show!_

**7. Perdita**

_Bella_

I had set my phone to vibrate at quarter past twelve so I ready to leave when Jake arrived to pick me up at half past. Unfortunately I had slept through it. It was sheer luck that I opened my eyes at the correct moment and took in the bright light of my digital alarm clock saying 12:29. I jumped out of bed quickly, forgetting Charlie in the next room and had to stop when I heard him move distinctly in his sleep.

I glanced down at myself and shuddered. My horrendous purple jogging pants and Muse hoodie were not appropriate clothes for chaperoning a meeting between mortal enemies and of course I had forgotten to get anything out earlier.

I glanced into my cupboard, not looking as I pulled out the first pair of jeans I could find, slipped my shoes on, and added the thickest jumper and jacket I could find.

Getting down the stairs turned out to be harder than I expected; the first one I stepped on creaked loudly and when I tried to compensate by leaning against the railing it did the same thing. I moved down slowly, wincing and listening for Charlie at each squeak but he did not stir. Eventually I got to the bottom and lightly jumping the last three steps and practically running to the door. I carefully unlatched it and then slipped it closed silently behind me. I turned, fingering the key in my pocket reassuringly – there was also a spare one under hidden above the door, since the last thing I wanted was to get locked out and have Charlie figure out what had happened.

Jake was already waiting for me and I crossed the street quickly doing a double take when I saw the bike behind him.

"Just one?" I asked disapprovingly.

"Yes just one. There is no way I am letting you ride alone after dark. You'll kill yourself." He grinned down at me and I punched him lightly in the arm, but he barely seemed to notice. It was like punching a tree. "Hurry up and put this on", he ordered, pulling a sleek black helmet off of the seat.

"Where's yours?" I asked suspiciously.

"I think I'll be ok" he answered as he passed it to me. "Hard head, remember?"

I nodded and slipped the helmet on my head, my ponytail digging uncomfortably into my skull. I lifted the visor to see him stepping over to the bike and motioning me over. I slipped on behind him and held on tight to his waist while he kicked off.

Riding with Jake was like nothing I had ever experienced. I couldn't help but compare it to Edward's driving. The speed was incredible but despite his carefully movements I was still terrified.

"If I didn't know better, I would think you were trying to impress me", I leaned forward and shouted in the direction of his ears. I wasn't sure he would hear me over the sound of the wind whipping past us.

"Maybe I am... I didn't realise bikers did it for you, Bella", he answered jovially, obviously enjoying the speed considerably more than me.

"Maybe it would if you weren't driving like a maniac."

"What, you don't like it fast, Bells?" he laughed again.

"You boys are all the same. What is it with guys and speed? Edward would always..." the words slipped out before I could even think of it and I felt Jake stiffened beneath me.

"I am nothing like that stinking leech!" His voice was overpowering and I shrank back as far as I could without removing my hands from his waist. I could feel him shaking; and it was affecting the whole bike.

"I didn't mean..."

"Just be quiet a minute Bella. We'll be there soon; I need a minute to collect my thoughts."

He stopped shaking but he was still stiff with tension. I didn't say anything, instead looking into the forest. The moon was high and the sky was shockingly clear, I could see thousands of tiny stars lighting the trees so that they glittered. It was beautiful.

Too soon, for I was so wrapped up in the landscape, we pulled off the side of the road and I quickly jumped off the back of the bike. Jake didn't look at me as he slipped it behind a large tree and out of sight of the road.

"I'm sorry Jake, I wasn't trying to compare you to him." He winced and then turned towards me.

"I'd rather just not talk about it Bella. I know you didn't think comparing me to him would be offensive to me. Hell from you it's probably a massive compliment, but that doesn't mean I have to like it." His voice was hard but his face gave him away, he looked upset and I yearned to go over and comfort him and explain that I had not meant to offend him, but he spoke again before I had the chance. "Let's just forget about it, okay?"

I nodded and walked towards him.

"So where is it we're meeting everyone?" I looked warily into the trees. What had seemed so beautiful and filled with starlight looked dark and quite scary now.

"They're waiting for us just away from the Cullen's territory. Sam figured it was better if you introduced everyone." His face was still angry.

"Oh Jake, please don't be mad at me... I just wasn't thinking, and I didn't even realise how you would take it. Can you forgive me?" the words were rushing out of my mouth before I knew what was happening.

"I know Bells, I really do. Being compared to anyone that someone loves is always a compliment from the person who gives it. I just... I just don't want you to think I am like him."

I looked up at him and moved slowly forward until I could reach up and touch his cheek.

"You are nothing like Edward, not where it really matters", I couldn't help but feel proud of myself as I said his name without the customary stab of pain. "Even if I did love him I should have known to take your feelings into consideration."

His hand came up to mine and pulled it away from his face, but he kept his eyes on mine.

"C'mon, we better go. We're already late because of you. Jump on my back and I'll run us there, it'll be a lot quicker than you walking."

He turned round and bent down slightly. I still had to stand on my tiptoes to put my arms round his neck, and before I knew it he stood up and I had my legs wrapped round his waist.

The heat coming off him surprised me. I knew he had been warmer than usual recently but it felt like the front half of my body was on fire and it was not pleasant. I could feel myself starting to sweat moments after he began running through the forest, the heat radiating off him increasing the faster he moved. I wished I hadn't worn so many clothes.

It was impressive. Even in his human form he was incredibly fast, although not nearly as fast as the Cullen's. I could remember Carlisle saying they would be a couple of miles from the road and I wondered how long it would take Jake to run it. Would I even have time to collect my thoughts? I had no idea what I was going to say when I got there, or really what was expected of me at all.

Only minutes later, Jake slowed down and knelt down so I could jump off his back.

"Thank you for coming Bella", Sam's voice came from beside me but I couldn't see him, since we were still deep in the forest. He seemed to sense my discomfort. "Don't worry, we are meeting in a clearing not far from here. You should be able to see far better when we get there."

"Oh, great. So, uh, when do we go?" I tried not to sound too enthusiastic but the darkness in here was really beginning to freak me out.

"Come on, they are waiting for us. Jacob, will you carry her again?"

I felt two arms come around me but instead of putting me on his back again, he held me almost as though I was a baby, cradling me to his chest. I could just hear Sam and someone else behind us as we moved, far slower than before, until we reached the edge of the trees and walked into a clearing I had not seen before. I jumped down as we entered but Jake tried to pull me back to him and kept one arm around me, as though he was holding me back.

The light from the stars and moon flooded the space between the trees and reflected off a thin brook that meandered down one side. However its beauty was eclipsed by the three people standing at the opposite end of the clearing.

My eyes immediately went to Carlisle, who was standing in the centre and just forward from the others. His posture was welcoming, arms outstretched towards us, but at the same time careful. His thick blond hair was flying backwards with the wind and I couldn't help but feel the same sense of security that I had always associated with him. He was wearing khaki pants with a large hand knitted jumper. I couldn't help but suspect the look was intentional, since with the "granddad jumper" he looked far older than anyone else here. Sneaky vampire; I knew Jake and Sam would be appraising him carefully behind me.

Esme was to his right, slightly further back than Carlisle but she stepped forward when I caught her eyes, a delicate smile lifting her face. She looked more beautiful every time I saw her. Her long thick hair was tied back and her golden eyes danced in the light. She wore a large bag on her back.

I moved my vision to the lone figure - standing a small distance from them, and I couldn't help the gasp that came from my mouth. Jasper was further back, partially obscured by the shade of the trees. His head held high, and he was facing away from us and staring hard at the night sky. His loose blond hair was flying around his face, and the movement of the trees made patterns of shade on his skin, while other areas lit up wherever the starlight hit it. The whole image was beautiful. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up and I could see the definition of his muscles, his perfectly still posture giving me time to examine him without interruption.

Suddenly his sleeves were quickly pulled down and I looked up, embarrassed to be caught staring at him. His golden eyes caught my brown ones and I inhaled sharply, feeling the tell tale heat of a blush cover my face.

"Bella," Carlisle's clear voice pulled me out of my distraction and I looked back at him, a warm smile on his face. Without thinking, I pushed myself away from Jake and began running across the clearing to reach them. I could hear Jake shout behind me but, I didn't pay any attention.

I stopped a couple of metres away from them, nearly falling when I put on the brakes.

"Carlisle." My voice was nervous but the look of relief on his face instantly relaxed me. He crossed the distance between us swiftly and pulled me close to him. I could hear Jake growl behind me but I didn't pull away. Instead I put my arms around his hard body and held him as tight as I could.

"You really are okay," he whispered in my ear before pulling back slightly and looking at me carefully. Esme coughed lightly beside me.

"Sorry Esme, I'm forgetting about you," I disentangled myself from Carlisle to hug his wife, who had walked over to join us.

"I can't express how good it is to see you, Bella," Carlisle said as I slipped back from Esme. I noticed the large camping bag behind her again and raised my eyebrows.

"I wasn't sure if anyone would be hungry," she whispered low into my ear. "There are peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and hot chocolate for anyone who wants it," she glanced at the wolves and I quickly promised to relay the offer, although I doubted they would accept.

"I'm glad to see you too Carlisle," I said, turning back to him and smiling up at him. "For a while, I wasn't sure I would see any of you ever again," A stabbing pain went through my heart but almost as soon as it appeared it was gone, replaced with a strange calm, I immediately turned to glare at Jasper, who was apparently messing with my emotions.

I had expected him to have join us but he had remained where he was, absolutely still since I had moved. I realised with disappointment that he may still blame himself for what had happened at my birthday, despite the message I had sent with Esme. I knew I had to do something to make him realise I did not blame him and that, despite what had happened, I was not afraid of him.

I faltered slightly, but without looking backwards to either the wolves or Esme and Carlisle, I started making my way forward. I saw him stiffen as I crossed the distance between us and I tried desperately to think of what to do, what to say.

"It's good to see you, Jasper." I was nearly next to him now and he turned towards me, his jaw clenched, his golden eyes staring hard into my brown ones. My nerves were close to getting the best of me. In a moment of rashness, instead of sticking out my hand as I had planned, I began to move closer and slowly lifted my arms so they met around the back of his neck, hugging him lightly.

"It's good to see you again," I reassured him.

I looked into his face again after my blush subsided and nearly laughed at his expression. He looked flabbergasted, his mouth slightly open, and his nostrils flared slightly, but when I looked into his eyes I could not look away. They were like nothing I had ever seen before... While the rest of the Cullens had very similar golden eyes when they were fed, fading to black only with hunger, his were something else completely. The depth and variety in them was amazing; flecks of gold mixed with flecks of amber, orange and even the occasional red swept like a storm into the pitch black of his iris. He blinked and I tried to hide my shock.

His mouth closed lightly and his arms moved around me, not quite touching. Then I felt him take a slow breathe in. I didn't move, allowing him to become used to my scent. Maybe I should have thought about how my plan would affect his bloodlust before I went through with it, but it was the only way I could think to prove of to him I had no hard feelings about my birthday.

"Hello, Bella, it's good to see you too." I smiled up at him and saw his pale mouth mirror mine, pulling up slightly at the corners.

He stepped back from me but continued to smile, his eyes probing me as I walked away.

I looked towards the wolves as I moved back towards Carlisle and Esme and could see that Sam, Jake, and Jared had moved into the middle of the clearing - Jake was scowling at me. I took Esme's outstretched hand as I reached her, and then began to lead the three vampires towards the three werewolves in front of them.

"Carlisle Cullen, I would like to introduce you to Sam Uley," Sam nodded his head politely but did not say anything, so I continued with the introductions. "Jacob Black and Jared Geyer," I motioned to the two of them in turn and then moved myself over to stand by Sam.

"Sam, this is Doctor Carlisle Cullen, his wife Esme and his son Jasper."

The two men looked at each other carefully and then Sam spoke.

"Well, now that the introductions are over I would suggest we get down to business," he said sternly.

Carlisle nodded. "I have one issue I would like to address immediately, simply to assuage my worries. The treaty..."

"The treaty is still in effect. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to that." Carlisle nodded in relief but Sam continued. "Even if it were not for your relationship with Bella, who is like family to Jake, you have done nothing to give us any reason to distrust you."

"Thank you," Carlisle smiled and I could see Jasper relax his body and waves of calm filled everyone. Jake glanced at me, one eyebrow raised at the obvious change in the mood, but I tapped my nose and turned back to the conversation between Carlisle and Sam, unwilling to miss anything. I was in charge of this meeting, in a way, and there was no way I was going to let it go wrong.

"There are a few changes we would like to make though."

Carlisle's smile faltered but did not fade. "While you were away, we extended our range to encompass Forks and other areas of the Peninsula, to ensure the safety of the population. We would appreciate knowing when you are here and when you are away so we can alter the range as necessary. We would also appreciate knowing when any new members join you," Sam finished, glancing at Jasper. I remembered with a start that he had not been with the Cullen's when they had visited here originally. I couldn't help but wonder what his life had been like before he found Alice and the Cullens.

"Of course, Sam. That seems quite reasonable. If I might, I would also ask that we be allowed to know of changes within the pack. We were not aware any of you had the ability to turn when we left."

"Yes, well, it was quite a surprise to me too. None of us believed the old legends, not even when you returned. It was only a year ago that I went through the change, and since then five others have joined me."

"Five?" Carlisle's voice was surprised but Sam nodded. Jake was frowning at the two of them, obviously unhappy with how much information was being exchanged, but Sam did not seem worried.

"That's very interesting. There were only three the last time. I wonder what caused the increase."

"We suspect it is something to do with your numbers," Sam's voice was bleak and Carlisle looked suitably ashamed.

"I did not realise we would cause that kind of problem for you, Sam, I apologise sincerely", Carlisle replied, whole body portraying his regret.

"It's not so bad", Jared spoke out, "And it's come in useful." his eyes were bright and he glanced at me.

Carlisle looked concerned once more and Jasper moved closer, as though he was trying to hear better.

"You've had problems since we left?" His voice was laced with concern and he looked at me carefully.

My voice was sticky, "Victoria..." Jasper moved forward further and Esme winced, "And Laurent," I thought back to the nomad's words in the clearing before the wolves arrived.

"Laurent?" Esme's voice was full of concern, "He left a couple of weeks after we arrived in Denali - Irina has been frantic trying to locate him."

"She won't have much luck," Jake's voice rumbled and I winced. Carlisle and Esme looked shocked, but Jasper merely nodded, looking at the wolves with what appeared to be respect.

"What happened?" Carlisle looked to Sam and then me.

"Laurent was going to kill me." Esme shuddered and moved towards me, but I held my hand out to stop her. Jasper nodded, urging me to continue. "He said he had come on Victoria's orders, but he bumped into me in the forest and..." I shuddered at the memory, seeing him walking towards me, knowing that it was going to end. I felt a wave of disgust at the relief I had thought it would bring. "The wolves arrived just in time. They knew what he was going to do..."

"We would do it again." Sam's voice was filled with authority. "Anyone who threatens human life around here will meet the same fate," he said, looking over the Cullen's assembled in front of him. Carlisle nodded at him.

"He would have met the same fate had we been here," he assured him, Sam nodded in agreement. "But what of Victoria?" Carlisle asked.

I shuddered at the mention of her name, but Jake stepped forward, staring angrily at Jasper.

"She has been trying to get past our defences for several weeks now."

"But you haven't got her?" Jasper's eyes were alive now and he was evaluating Jake carefully, his posture aggressive.

"If you think it's so easy, _leech_, why don't you do it?" Jake bustled forward and Jasper followed suit, mirroring his movements.

"If she was still here, I would have had it done by now." Jasper's voice was cruel and unsettlingly confident. For some reason I didn't doubt what he said was true – my memories of James' death were blurry, but I knew Jasper had a lot to do with it.

"It's not a simple case of just taking her down; we've got people to protect as well. Why don't you take care of it, if you think it is so easy?" Jake's voice had risen slightly and he was shaking slightly. Sam glared at him but did not say anything. I was getting worried he was going to snap at any second. He had that look on his face that usually meant I didn't want to be near him. I was glad not to be on the receiving end of it. Jasper either didn't realise or didn't care because he kept poking at Jake who was now going a strange shade of beetroot.

"Maybe I would be able to if you had just contacted us when she got here instead of taking on something so obviously over your head. She could be halfway around the world by now. Who knows when it will cross her mind to come back?"

"You're the ones you just left her! If you think you can do then off you go!"

I couldn't understand what Jasper was doing, but he kept going, the two of them arguing back and forth about who would kill Victoria first. It was truly, it was like watching two five year olds fight. To be honest I had always thought he was more mature than that. "_For god's sake, just whip them out and we can measure them already_", the words came out under my breath before I even thought of it and suddenly there was silence as everyone turned to look at me. Even the freaking wind stopped.

No one moved until I saw Jasper's lip begin to curl slightly into a smirk. A moment later Jake began to smile too, closely followed by the other two wolves. Carlisle still had a vague look of surprise on his face. At least he did until Esme fell into giggles behind him, her light laughter echoing round the clearing.

I couldn't help but suspect Jasper's little ability had more than a little to do with it but it had certainly broken any tension within the group, Carlisle, Jake and Jared were grinning and even the corners of Sam's mouth were twitching as everyone waited for Esme to stop laughing.

"So," Carlisle's voice brought us all back to the issue at hand as Jasper and Jake backed away so they were in their respective groups again. "It would be fair to say you are having some problems with Victoria, and I assume Bella is the target."

"She was at first, although we didn't know it, but she has also appeared at the Reservation a number of times as well. We're kind of at a loss. She was making almost daily attempts to get past our defences but for the past week, she has entirely disappeared."

"She's changing her tactics," Jasper interjected, serious once again. His whole posture changed as he took control of the situation, and even Sam turned towards him. "Whatever she was doing before obviously wasn't working, so you must have been doing something right," he said, glancing at Jake who puffed his chest out proudly.

"She'll have gone somewhere to regroup. Unfortunately, there is no way to know what she has planned. She could be trying to reach out to other nomads or covens to join her – in which case we are going to have to do the same thing at some point. Or she might be going after Edward instead, although I doubt she's that good."

His face was stoic as he mentioned his wife and brother's disappearance and I wondered how he managed it. I was still perfecting my game face but Jasper was obviously comfortable with what he was talking about. His whole body exuded confidence in everything he was saying. I had never seen this side of him before, and I couldn't help but feel I had underestimated the man in front of me.

I suddenly realized I was so totally immersed in my thoughts that I had not heard a word he had said for at least a minute.

"...We are going to have to be hyper-vigilant until she reappears," he ended, stepping back slightly, to allow someone else to take the floor.

As soon as Jasper finished the conversation quickly turned into a complicated discussion of tactics between all the men. Reassured that they were probably not going to start fighting, at least for a couple of hours, I let myself sink to my knees onto the cold earth. Like a flash Esme was beside me and had slipped a blanket underneath me. As soon as I was settled, she grabbed her backpack and started throwing sandwiches at me. I opened them greedily and registered her offering them to the pack but they all refused. As soon as I had finished, it a huge thermos of hot chocolate was placed in my hands and I took a deep gulp. My eyes started to close and I felt Esme take the thermos before sitting down next to me and letting me lean against her. It was like leaning on a rock, but she tried to fold herself in the most comfortable position for me.

The sounds of the forest entered my dreams, as did the voices of people talking around me. Occasionally Esme's soft voice would whisper sweet nothings in my ear, urging me to sleep but I felt as though I couldn't quite get there. My mind would just not switch off entirely. Eventually the talking died down and I felt myself being picked up by cold, hard arms and kissed lightly on the cheek before the cold arms changed to a set of very warm ones and I curled into them, thankful for the warmth surrounding my cold body.

What felt like seconds later, I heard a soft voice, "Bella, Bella baby you need to wake up." I turned myself roughly and fell, crushing myself between two solid walls. I opened my eyes and immediately began to struggle.

"Bella!" Jake's voice stopped my movement and I looked up. I realised I was in the back of a car, stuck between the front and rear seats. We were parked twenty metres from my house in a truck I did not recognise.

Jake leant forward and offered me his hand, which I gladly accepted. He quickly yanked me out of the car, nearly dislocating my shoulder and propelling me into a tree behind him. I fell and caught the side of my shoe on the pavement, scuffing it badly.

"For god's sake Bells!" Jake looked down at me, clearly unimpressed before slipping his arms under me and lifting me up. "I hope you left your window open, because it is going to be difficult enough getting you in there without it being locked." With that, he began running softly down the street, carrying me tightly against him as though I weighed nothing.

"What happened?" I murmured into him, disappointed at myself for having missed the majority of the conversation between them. "After I fell asleep I mean..."

"Don't worry, you didn't miss much", Jake's voice was barely a whisper as we approached the back of the house and I closed my eyes unwilling to watch our ascent. "We talked shop for a while, throwing around ideas about what Victoria could be doing, and where she could be hiding but we had to stop. You were completely gone and the lee-... vamps wanted to get back before sunrise. Typical. Sam took the bike back and then came with the truck for me to bring you home," My eyes were still shut but I had the suspicion we had stopped moving. I didn't want to risk it though so I screwed them up tighter. "We're here, by the way, Bella."

I opened up in relief and realized he was standing in the middle of my room. He walked over and dropped me lightly on to the bed.

"Get some sleep Bells. Paul is on his way here now to keep an eye on you. I'm gonna go join Sam. He's talking to Billy. I'll speak to you later."

"Get some sleep. Thanks Jake," I managed to murmur before he disappeared out the window and I quickly fell asleep again.

_A/N: I'm so nervous to hear what you guys think of this chapter - seriously considering hiding from my inbox for the next couple of days if it doesn't go down well. Next chapter should be up next weekend, once again, leave me a review and I will send you a little teaser. Thanks for reading :)_


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: Damn, this chapter has totally kicked my ass. Major apologies to those I promised teasers out to, by the time I had anything worth sending out it had been that long I figured you probably just wanted the chapter instead. I really did plan on having it out sooner but writing from Jake's pov was hard stuff and in addition to that we have had a spectacular 40 inches of snow this week at my side of the pond, compared to the usual four over the whole month, so much of my writing time has been spent getting around, making snowmen and having random friends who are stuck in the city over to stay. _

_Anyways, special thanks, as always, to my amazing beta heavyinfinity and my darling pre-reader Nissa-Cullen, this chapter would never have seen the light of day if not for you two! Big thanks as wel to everyone who has reviewed/put me on their alerts - I cannot believe there are more than 200 people following my story, and just under that have me on favourites. It's so nice to know you guys are enjoying it.  
_

**8. Dercetus**

_Jake._

Our meeting with the leeches had not been as I had expected.

To say I had been on edge walking towards the clearing was an understatement; luckily carrying Bella kept me relatively distracted. Of course, that had disappeared almost as soon as we got to the clearing. As soon as she saw _them,_ she jumped off me and I had had to be quick to even keep my hand on her shoulder, trying to hold her back so I could keep her safe.

This was the first time I had seen any of them since I started phasing and I could not believe I had not noticed the differences between them and other people. They were otherworldly, just like those of us in the pack, but they were not natural like us; they were demons.

Their leader, was standing in the centre. Their layout roughly reflected ours; Sam stood opposite the blonde doctor, the two of them watching one another carefully. Jared was on Sam's left facing the younger male who was standing eerily still and facing away from us. Just watching him made me want to fidget. It wasn't right, his lack of movement. I didn't even think he was breathing. Across from Bella and me was the auburn haired woman. Her face was delicate and she held herself as though she was afraid of what was about to come. She looked the most human out of all of them but even then I had to hold myself back from my baser instinct to attack her.

"Bella", the leader's voice made me shudder, too sickly and sweet to be human. Just like their smell, it was overpowering even from here and I wanted to back away and distance ourselves from the dangerous creatures in front of us. Of course, Bella felt differently. The moment she heard his voice she ran towards them, miraculously managing not to fall as she crossed the clearing quickly and threw her arms around him.

I watched them carefully as she hugged each of them, and only Sam's earlier orders to allow her to act as she usually would prevented me from racing over to stop her from getting anywhere near them. After she greeted the two older ones she walked even further away to hug the scary looking guy at the back. I could see the scars covering every visible surface of his skin, the bite marks glittering, shouting danger to anyone who dared to look.

After he delicately hugged Bella back she practically skipped towards us, even holding the female vamp's hand as she brought the group closer together.

After the introductions we got straight down to business. I moved myself next to Bella at the first opportunity, hovering protectively behind her. I could see the blond vamp glancing up at us periodically, but he didn't say anything.

Sam's discussion about the treaty was not something he had talked about with us and I was not happy that he let the leeches know how many we were but there was nothing I could do about it.

I was a little worried when Laurent came up. I knew Bella had met him before, but I wasn't too sure what his relationship was with the rest of them. They seemed shocked initially but as soon as she explained it they calmed down. I had to admit I was almost impressed with the doctor for saying he would have done the same thing, despite the fact Laurent had apparently been in a relationship with one of their friends.

And then Victoria came up and blondie started talking with a vengeance. Strangely, despite the fact we were yelling at each other I couldn't help but like him. He was cocky and sure of himself, demeaning us for not having managed to kill her already. Honestly, I was thinking about killing him but just when I got worried I was going to lose it and phase, Bella told us to whip them out.

It took about ten seconds for the words to sink in. By then blondie already had a shit-eating grin on his face, similar to the one I could feel on my own face. Moments later the female vamp at the back burst out into laughter, which was high-pitched in a way that grated on my ears. Strangely, Bella's face more than made up for the discomfort – she was bright red, her blush covering her cheeks and neck. Even her forehead looked pinker than usual.

After _mummy_ leech calmed down again we launched into a discussion of tactics. I barely noticed as Bella began to sway on her feet and felt terrible when the female, Esme, came over and pulled her down under a tree before offering her sandwiches and hot chocolate.

I was even more surprised when she turned to all of us and made the same offer; I could feel the others' awkwardness as we all politely declined. Although sandwiches and hot chocolate sounded pretty good right now I was worried the smell coming off them would make me puke and that would not help matters.

I had also watched on in surprise as the older woman sat next to Bella, covering her in a large blanket and then putting her arm around her, softly playing with her hair. It felt so wrong to watch one of the most dangerous predators in the world taking care of this tiny human girl. I couldn't understand how Bella could be so comfortable, but she began nodding off and occasionally I could hear Esme whispering comforting words into her ear.

It was a number of hours later when we eventually stopped talking. Carlisle lifted his hand and explained that due to the clear sky they would have to be home before the sun rose. He suggested we meet again later that night, which we readily agreed too. I was slightly put off by the comment about returning before sunrise; after discussing fighting on the same side as them for a number of hours, it was stark reminder of what exactly we were getting in bed with.

Esme lifted Bella easily and brought her over to the group. Her face was peaceful and she leant into the older woman trustingly. Each of them kissed her lightly on the cheek goodbye, even the scary looking blond dude, and then she was handed over to me.

I did my best not to touch any of them as the transfer took place, but their cold, hard skin sent shivers down me when _mummy_ accidently brushed her arm against mine. As soon as Bella was in my arms. I held her close and felt her pulling herself closer to the heat coming off my body.

They waited for us to leave before running out of the clearing in the opposite direction, both sides keeping their eyes on the other as we each backed away.

The walk back to the road was slower than the run in and I was very thankful when Sam offered to run ahead and get his truck for us. I could not imagine how I was going to get Bella home on the bike when she could barely hold her head up, I obviously hadn't thought this through as well as I should have. Jared stayed with me, just in case, but I couldn't help but suspect Victoria would not reappear tonight. She would know as soon as she came back into the area that some of the Cullens had returned and would become even more careful, and even more difficult to kill.

Jared was talking non-stop on the walk back, and I couldn't help but suspect he was actually quite pleased about the way things had turned out, particularly the fact that Jasper had offered to do some training with us. I felt there was more to him than met the eye. Carlisle and Esme seemed straightforward, but there was something else going on with that one. He talked about battle as though it was second nature to him, coming up with ideas to lure Victoria out that we had not even thought of, although we had quickly vetoed all those that involved using Bella as bait.

Eventually, we made it to the road and I was pleased to see Sam was already there.

"Is she okay?" I shrugged my shoulders as best as I could without waking her while he opened the back door and laid her across the seats.

"I have to get back and talk to Billy. He is anxious to hear what has been discussed," Sam said as he stripped off his t-shirt and shoes and threw them in the trunk.

"I'll drop her off and get back as soon as I can. I'd like to be there when you talk to Billy."

"Of course, I will wake Paul and ask him to head to the Swan's to keep an eye on them." I nodded thankfully. Bella stirred in the back seat and I slammed the door shut and jumped in the front.

"Send him my thanks; he won't be happy about being woken up this early."

"No, I doubt it but he doesn't have a choice. We didn't spend our whole night sorting out tactics to protect her, only for her to be killed because we didn't sort out a schedule yet."His voice was hard but his demeanour softened as he looked at Bella, sleeping with a stray piece of hair in her mouth.

"It's amazing the lengths people, all kinds, will go for that one."

I nodded, unsure what to say and we all remained still for a moment, looking at Bella's prone form under Sam's huge jacket.

"I better go, it's getting seriously late."

"Yes, be back as soon as you can. I suspect Billy has been up for as long as we have and I know he needs his sleep."

"Don't worry, I'll be quick Sam," I answered as I saw them disappear back into the trees, putting my foot on the gas.

I let my mind wander on the short drive back to Bella's. It was strange to think only a week and a half ago I had been so certain we were perfect for one another. I'd thought she was perfect.

Her face had filled my mind for months, maybe even a year now, since she moved back, and after Edward had left I honestly thought I might have a chance, I was so certain that I would be the one to put her back together... And, I suppose, in a way, I was, just not in the way I had expected.

It was her actions at the beach that finally pulled me over the edge. I tried to be calm with her when I asked her about it but I was so angry I barely had control over myself. It was lucky I had fallen asleep as soon as we got back to my place, otherwise I dreaded to think what I might have said to her.

And that had been it. While I slept, I dreamt about her, realising how truly broken she was. It was not in any outwardly obvious way but when I looked into her eyes that night I realised she might never love again, and it was definitely not going to be me if she did.

I pulled to a stop at the end of her road, not wanting the roar of the truck to wake Charlie and then began trying to wake her as gently as I could. It would make it far easier for me if I didn't have to carry her through the window while she was asleep. Maybe if I was lucky she would even be able to make it in by herself.

"Bella... Bella, babe", she stirred slightly so I leant back to get closer to her. "You need to wake up Bells," I said, raising my voice slightly.

She gripped the edge of the seat but still didn't wake and I considered just trying to carry her when she suddenly rolled over, landing neatly between the front and back seats.

"Bella?" I jumped out of the truck and ran to the back, opening the door to see her sprawled, still asleep, fighting with the seats.

"Bella!" My voice was louder this time and I hoped I wouldn't wake any of her neighbours. At the sound of her name her eyes flicked open and gazed round in surprise. As she took in her surroundings I leaned forward, offering her one of my hands, which she gladly accepted to pull herself out of the truck. Her progress was slow though so I decided to give her a little hand and pulled her forward.

Apparently she was even lighter than I thought, or I was stronger because I had to pull her back from being propelled into a tree. As soon as I had her on her feet she slipped again and I had to grab her round the waist.

"For god's sake Bells, I hope you have your window open." There was no way I could trust her to sneak in alone when she could barely stand. "It's going to be difficult enough getting you in there without it being locked."

She weighed nothing so I cradled her close and started jogging down the street as quietly as I could. She was shielding herself from the wind with my body, her face crushed between my chest and arm.

"What happened...? After I fell asleep I mean," she said, her voice was thick with sleep.

"Don't worry, you didn't miss much." I kept my voice low so I didn't wake Charlie as I stood under her window, working out the best way to get up there. We were lucky. The window was open, but it still wasn't going to be easy getting the two of us up there. It also gave me the perfect excuse not to go into details about what had been discussed with her. I didn't think she really needed to know the gritty details of our planned fights with Victoria; she worried too much anyway.

I jumped lightly, glad of Bella's distraction. I couldn't use my arms so I had to launch myself off the bottom of tree and simply hope the angle was right.

"We talked shop for a while, tossing around ideas about what Victoria could be doing, where she could be hiding but we had to stop. You were completely gone and the lee-" I felt her tense against me, although she was still lodged firmly in my chest, and tried to cover up, "...vamps wanted to get home before sunrise. Typical. Sam took the bike back and then came with the truck for me to bring you home."

I stopped, waiting for her to say something, or maybe jump out of my arms. I peaked down and realised she had her eyes screwed up.

"We're here, by the way, Bella."

She began to open her eyes and I strode across the room and deposited her in her unmade bed. She was still dressed but before I could offer to get her pyjamas, which were on the floor by my feet, she had closed her eyes again.

"Get some sleep Bells", I looked down at her, her large brown eyes were nearly shut, and I could just see them moving under her long eyelashes. "Paul is on his way here now to keep an eye on you. I'm gonna go join Sam, while he talks to Billy then I'll head to bed." she nodded vaguely. "I'll speak to you later."

"Get some sleep. Thanks Jake," her small voice ordered me just as I heard Charlie stir in the next room. I quickly moved to the window and climbed on to the ledge, closing it as quietly as I could and then I jumped, landing lightly before straightening myself and looking into the forest.

After a couple of minutes a long dark nose peaked its way out and I nodded to Paul before turning away and walking back to the truck.

It was nearly light by the time I pulled into Sam's drive - I could hear Emily bustling around inside and as I put on the brakes she popped her head around the door. Her face fell slightly when she realised it was me and not Sam but she still smiled widely.

"Hey, Jake, long night?" She stepped down the front steps lightly and her hair flew wildly in front of her face, a large robe wrapped around her. "Do you want to come in for some breakfast?"

"Thanks, Emily, but I need to get home. Sam is over there at the moment talking to my dad and I don't want to miss any more of what is said."

She nodded and then slipped back up the stairs.

"Well feel free to come over when you're done. You boys must be hungry after your late night," she offered before heading back through the door. I began to make my way down the street. I could have easily moved into the forest and shifted but to be honest I had been spending a lot of time in my wolf form lately and it was nice to have some time to collect my thoughts before they became known by everyone else.

My mind fell back to thinking about Bella and the changes that had happened between us in the past week. We were as close as ever, and in fact this whole Victoria thing meant we were spending even more time together but there had been a definite shift. I wasn't sure who it had originated with, it could have been either of us after I pulled her out that water but things were no longer the same. When I had looked at her recently my heart did not pound in the same manner... my palms no longer got sweaty when she spoke to me. I thought I would never feel anything like the love and attraction I had for Bella ever again in my life and now it was entirely gone, well the attraction at least. I didn't understand how.

The sun was quite high by the time I reached the house and I could hear a loud conversation going on in the front room, I sped up and opened the door, unsure of what I would see but the only people there were Sam, Billy, Sue and, surprisingly, Leah.

"What's up? You guys look like someone died," I realised my mistake as soon as I said it. Sam and Billy looked reproachfully at me while Sue turned her head and Leah glared angrily at me, nearly shaking with rage.

"Leah, calm down." Sam's voice was sharp and powerful. She looked angrily at him before dropping her head down on to the table with a thunk.

"Jacob, go and make us some tea. We have a lot to talk about."

Even in our human form everything Sam said was still an order so despite the fact I wanted to stay, to apologise to Sue for my insensitive comments I found my feet leading me through to the kitchen and setting the kettle on the hob. I could hear hushed voices in the other room, along with the occasionally sarky sounding comment from Leah, I moved closer, trying to hear what was being said.

"... highly unusual, I've never heard of it before", Billy said in a low voice.

"We all know there has been an increase lately, could it be anything to do with that?" Sam questioned.

"No doubt, but there are others that would have made more sense... Quil, even Seth... the problem is informing the others. This will cause issues we could not have predicted."

The sound of the water boiling cut off the conversation and I quickly grabbed several mugs and the old tea pot and took everything through. They all looked shifty as I came in, apart from Leah who still had her head in her hands. I couldn't help but suspect she was trying not to look at Sam, who we all knew she still had feelings for.

"Thank you, Jacob." Sam stood and took the tray from my hands, motioning me to the seat next to Billy, who folded his arms in front of him and stared at me carefully.

"Jake, there's something we need to discuss with you." He paused and glanced at Sam and Sue who both nodded.

"Jake, we are trusting you to help with this... adjustment", Sam said, pushing his hair back. I started to get genuinely worried; it took a lot to shake Sam. I saw him glance at Leah quickly, who was still face down, stubbornly avoiding anyone's gaze, still shaking slightly.

Suddenly, her head snapped up and she glared angrily around the room.

"Why don't you just get on with it, Sam? For fucksake; it isn't hard! I'm a wolf, I'm a fucking werewolf!" She slammed her head back down on the table and I looked at Sam with alarm.

What the fuck?

It wasn't possible for women to join the pack. It just didn't happen. In all the stories there had never been any mention of a woman phasing,

Sam caught my eye, noting the mask of shock that had covered my features and nodded imperceptibly at me. I looked again at Leah, who remained still, although her breathing was ragged. I thought she might cry.

"Does anyone else know?" My voice was gruff, as though I was having difficulty getting the words out.

"Yes. Paul was patrolling when it happened. He talked her through and got her away from Seth and Sue. It appears Harry had seen the signs..." he paused at the mention of Harry's name and looked to Sue who was now trying to comfort her only daughter. "Why didn't you tell us? We could have helped."

I realised his question was not directed at me but Sue, who looked up at him.

"What would you have had me do, Sam?" She looked at him angrily. Apparently his Alpha trick did not work on her and I winced at the sound of someone talking back to him, since it so rarely happened. "Harry figured out what was going on, and then he had a heart attack! Now if you don't mind I am taking my daughter home. We will come back tomorrow afternoon and finish this." And with that she dragged Leah up and out of the house.

No one spoke for several minutes, all of us lost in thought about this latest revelation. And then I realised Leah would be able to hear all my thoughts and lost it, it was weird enough having four guys in my head but I certainly didn't want a girl in there too, particularly if that girl was Leah.

"What the hell are we going to do, Sam?" I could see my confusion and worry mirrored on his face.

"What are we going to do?" He threw his hands up. "What can we do, Jacob?"

"We could help her control it. Maybe she would be able to stop."

"I can't do that! You know we need the extra body with what is going on. I need you to be calm here, Jacob." He stared intently at me and I tried to find the adult within myself, to deal with this rationally rather than freaking out as I would like, and to act more like him.

Women werewolves just didn't exist, not as far as we were concerned.

I tried to step back from the situation, to imagine it was as though anyone else had changed.

"We need to tell the others, and quickly, I don't think they will take it too well if they phase and she's there inside their heads." I shuddered to think of what it would be like to share a mind with a girl, and not just any girl one I was not particularly fond of at the best of times. Besides, she was still in love with Sam. I cringed at that thought, realizing it was far worse for him that it was for me.

"Good plan. We will organise a meeting at sunset. Somewhere out of the way. Then we can come to meet Sue and Leah here."

I nodded and turned to my father, who hadn't spoken, seemingly deep in thought.

"Billy, what are your thoughts?" Sam's question pulled him from his reverie and he looked up sharply.

"Yes, yes, that will do fine," he said, his expression hard. "I think we are going to have to prepare for the fact that Leah might not be the last to turn. With the Cullen's back, we are going to have to prepare for the idea of the pack growing further."

Sam and I looked at him in shock. Unfortunately, it made sense though. Ever since Sam's change when the Cullen's first returned it had been suspected that being in close vicinity to their kind was a definitive factor.

"I hadn't thought of that. We had assumed that it would stop with Jake. Even his addition was more than ever before... When will it stop, Billy?"

"I'm worried it won't until the Cullens move on, maybe not even after that. We have had such a large coven next to us for so long now..."

"We can't ask them to leave", I spoke out, voicing an opinion that I knew would be unpopular, although probably not unexpected. "At least not until Victoria is dealt with." I spat her name, anger filling me again at the thought of anyone trying to hurt Bella and what would happen if anyone else got in the way. "I hate to say it, but after our talk today, I think we need them."

Neither of them spoke but they seemed to be in agreement. My body ached and I could feel my eyes beginning to droop, since it had been hours since I had last slept.

Sam moved from his pose leaning against the wall when I stood and, to my surprise, offered me his hand.

I took it and shook it gingerly.

"We will meet at six in the usual place. We need to keep everyone calm while we explain this, I don't think anyone is going to be particularly happy about this. Go get some rest Jake. It's been a rough couple of days." He slapped me across the back before nodding goodbye to Billy and then slipped out the back door.

I turned to my father, who was still seated deep in thought but I could think of nothing to say to him. Everything that had happened recently had knocked me on my ass completely and I couldn't quite understand what to do with all the information.

"I..." It was no good. He looked up at me and I think he understood my turmoil. He nodded to me. "Goodnight, dad."

"Goodnight, son."

I walked slowly to my room, stripping my clothes off as I walked down the small corridor.

I was asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

_A/N: I've decided after my massive panic this week that I am not going to make the promise of teasers - if anyone is particularly desperate for one leave me a review and I will come up with something for you and send it out asap. Oh, and please let me know what you thought of this chapter, I know nothing much happened on the Bella/Jasper front but I promise more time with the two of them next chapter, and the more reviews I get the faster I tend write ^_^ and you never know, if you are really lucky I might get snowed in and have no choice but to write... _


	9. Chapter 9

**Happy New Year everyone! Sorry this has taken me so long to get out, it was entirely my fault, everything just got a wee bit too much for me over the festive season, you know how it can get ;) Hope y'all had an amazing time as I did. **

**Just in case you need a recap of what is going in, Esme has returned to Forks on a search for Edward and Alice, who disappeared after hearing Bella had died. Unhappy with what she hears from our favourite human, Esme calls in reinforcements in the form of Carlisle and Jasper. We're picking up again from Bella's pov, after she fell asleep at the meeting between the Cullens and the Quileutes. **

**Special thanks to heavyinfinity and Nissa-Cullen for putting up with me the past few weeks, you guys are lifesavers, and I really appreciate your gentle prodding! Any mistakes in this are my own, I just couldn't help fiddling with it one last time... **

* * *

**9. Nurse**

_Bella_

The sun hit my face and I wearily opened my eyes. Looking up at the canopy of my bed, trying to remember how I had gotten home. I had some vague recollections of being carried through the forest and a large blue truck, but nothing beyond that and I couldn't help but feel I had failed slightly in my job as mediator.

I slipped my legs over the side of the bed and rose slowly till I was sitting. A cursory glance at my alarm clock told me it was half past three, I had slept through most of the day.

I got up, stretching myself and dared to glance down. Although I was underneath the covers, I was still in my clothes from last night, not a good start. I pulled my jumper off and threw it, along with my jeans and t-shirt, in the hamper before picking up my discarded pyjama bottoms and old vest top from before I had left last night.

I listened for Charlie as I walked downstairs, wondering why he hadn't woken me, but I quickly realised the house was empty. My legs took me in the direction of the kitchen, apparently following my rumbling stomach, and I immediately opened the fridge to survey the contents.

It felt a bit late to make myself anything breakfasty so I pulled out a pasta meal from a couple of days ago and began heating it on the stove. I left it simmering and sat down at the table, still trying to shake of the last remnants of sleep. It took me a moment to realise the folded piece of paper in front of me had my name on it quickly, wondering who had left it.

_Bella, _

_I'm so sorry about this but I'm not going to be around the next couple of days. A couple of kids have gone missing in Hoquaim. Probably just disappeared for a long weekend but they've asked me to come in and help; extra arms and all that. I'll be staying at home but probably won't be back till after you get to sleep and will be out again in the morning. Maybe you could have Jake or Angela over, I don't particularly like the idea of you being alone, but there wasn't much choice. _

_Take care, Dad X_

I almost giggled at the lone kiss at the bottom of the page. It seemed so at odds with Charlie's personality but I liked it all the same. It felt like we were closer now than we had ever been before and I know we both appreciated it. He must have left really early this morning, so hopefully he hadn't even looked in to check on me – I was not sure how I could have explained being fully dressed in bed.

I slipped the note behind a magnet on the fridge and pulled the pasta and sauce off the hob. I poured it all into a large bowl and sat back down.

I glanced out the window wondering if Jake was outside, but then I remembered something about Paul watching me and sighed. I could call him, but he might be asleep as well and I knew he needed the rest; the only people who had been sleeping less than me recently were the wolves. I knew I was safe with my werewolf bodyguard outside, but I could still do with some company and Paul wasn't exactly what I had in mind. I could try Angela but she would probably already have plans with Ben, and I didn't want to play third wheel.

I mulled it over a little more before deciding I may as well just bite the bullet and call Jake.

I finished my very late breakfast before cleaning the kitchen and living room and then grabbed the just dusted phone from its holder.

I dialled the number from memory and waited as it began to ring, chirruping in my ear. Just as I thought it was going to go to their machine a deep, thunderous voice rolled down the speaker.

"Hello?"

"Billy, it's Bella." I squeaked into the phone.

"Bella, I take it you are looking for Jake," he said wearily.

"Yeah, I was kind of hoping to speak to him." Whenever I spoke to Billy, I felt like I was talking to someone far older that his fifty odd years. That feeling had only been emphasised when I had learnt the truth about his position within the tribal hierarchy.

"He isn't in right now, can I pass along a message."

"Oh... um, well I was just wondering if I would be seeing him tonight. Charlie won't be around much the next couple of days and I was looking for some company."

"Charlie's gone?" He asked quickly.

"Yeah, some trouble down in Hoquaim. He's going to be out there all day for the next couple of days. Some kids have gone missing or something."

"I hadn't heard about that, I'll make sure Sam knows." I couldn't help but frown. It was beginning to feel like everything that was bad in the world was related to the supernatural.

"Don't worry, Bella. We'll keep an eye on him." Well, I suppose it could never hurt to have a couple of werewolves looking after Charlie, just in case. I was pretty sure they would be useful in the face of both the supernatural and the worst the human world could come up with.

"Thanks Billy. Do you know when Jake will be back?"

"Not until late tonight, I don't think. We've had some _problems_ down here that he's helping Sam deal with."

My imagination immediately went into overdrive. What could have happened since last night? Was it Victoria? Had something horrible happened? And I had been asleep... oh god.

"Wha...? Is anyone...?" My mouth tried to come out with the words.

"Everyone is fine. We've got a new member... someone unexpected."

"Oh." I was immediately relieved, but at the same time horrified that someone else was going through the agony Jake had described the transition to be.

"Well, I suppose I can make other plans... What about Paul? Jake said he was with me."

"Yes, we couldn't risk leaving you unprotected, so Paul is there as a lookout."

Well, that wasn't fair. The pack was having an emergency and yet one of their members was here keeping an eye on me. I hated being such a burden to them, and suddenly I had the greatest idea since sneakers.

"You know, Paul should really be with the pack..." Billy didn't say anything, so I continued. "What if we could get someone else to keep an eye on me, so he could be with you?"

I heard Billy's breathing hike slightly, indicating he obviously understood what I was getting at.

"Are you sure you are any safer with them than you are alone, Bella?"

I hated to have this argument again, but I knew Billy was only looking out for me. I had even nearly forgiven him for the message he had sent with Jake at last year's prom, 'We'll be watching'... creepy, much?

"I'm sure Billy. In fact, I have decided on it. I'm going to call Esme now. I trust you can find a way to let Paul know."

I didn't want to give him the chance to try to discourage me, so instead of waiting for a response, I said a quick, overly perky, goodbye and hung up.

When he didn't immediately call back to yell, I took it as a sign of approval and began hunting for the copy of the Cullen's number I took down when Carlisle called.

I typed in the number carefully. I didn't know why, but I was afraid that they would not answer, that somehow they would have left again since last night, so I was surprised when the phone was picked up before the first ring had finished.

"Cullen residence," Esme's feathery light voice tinkled through the phone. She sounded so much happier than she had when she returned to Forks only a couple of days ago, and it warmed my heart. I could never stay angry at Esme, she was my mother in all the traditional senses of the word and the thought of her being unhappy made my heart pound in an extremely unpleasant way.

"Hey, Esme."

"Bella! I'm so glad you called!"

Her voice, if possible, went up another couple of octaves and I was reminded sharply of Alice, suddenly feeling filled with worry for her. I had been so wrapped up in what was going on here, I hadn't even asked about what happened to the Cullens after they left Forks. I now had the chance to rectify that, and I found I needed to know what had happened to both Alice and Edward, even though I was still not sure I would want to see the two of them again.

"I was wondering if maybe, well... Charlie's away and Jake is busy, so I figured, maybe...you wanted to meet up today?"

I heard a bang at the other end of the phone and then Esme's voice came again, a million miles a minute.

"Oh Bella that sounds wonderful! You must come over here, immediately! Can you stay for dinner? We can order in for you."

I tried to stop her as she began naming types of food and takeout.

"Esme, that's very sweet of you but I can figure out my own dinner."

"Don't be silly, dear. I'll sort out it all out. Now, when am I expecting you?" I looked down at my dishevelled state and paused. I would most definitely need a shower before I went over.

"An hour and a bit, maybe. I need to do some stuff around here first..."

"Perfect, that gives me time to run into town and get some supplies!" I thought about challenging her again, but knew there was no point. "I'll see you soon, Bella."

The phone clicked and I began to worry about what I had got myself into, Esme's enthusiasm and the painful discussion I could see looming. Unfortunately it looked like it was too late to back out now though... I comforted myself with the thought of a long, hot shower and made my way back upstairs.

I stayed under the water until it began to cool then quickly washed myself and jumped back out. Charlie wasn't in, so I wrapped the towel around myself and walked briskly back to my room to find some clothes. Although I was no longer he son's girlfriend, I still wanted to impress Esme, so I looked through my stuff for something vaguely presentable. I briefly wished I still had my blue blouse but then passed the thought off. I had thrown it away along with a number of other items that reminded me of Edward.

Instead I grabbed a red one along with a clean pair of trousers and my cleanest pair of sneakers.

I pulled out my seldom used make-up bag and began trying to hide the circles under my eyes, but it didn't do any good and I knew with their super sight it would not trick the Cullen's. Instead I put on a little bit of pink blush on and a coating of mascara and then headed for the door.

I locked up quickly and glanced into the forest. I was certain I could see Paul's large wolf form but, when I moved closer, it turned out to be a bush. I knew he would be close though. I unlocked my truck and quickly jumped in the cab. I thought with remorse once more about the radio I had clawed out the dashboard; it would have been nice to be able to listen to some music on my way up there but at the time it just been yet another reminder of what I had lost. I frequently wondered why Edward had forgotten that but managed to take everything of true meaning with him. It was sloppy, and so unlike him.

I followed the familiar roads out of town, allowing my mind to drift over the many other times I had come this way. Then I slammed on the breaks. I had forgotten about the most recent trip I made this way.

In the time since he had left Edward, had tried repeatedly to give me money for tuition next year, even going as far as posting a box stuffed with money to my house. I in return had brought them back to his, and a little forcibly at that, I had thrown them through the front door. I would have to offer to pay for the repairs when I arrived.

Too soon, I was there. My heart began to pound and I felt a hollow area in my chest, although it was only an echo of what I had felt before. I knew I wanted to see them, but suddenly the thought of it was terrifying. Why had I not thought of this before? What would they ask me? Would I be strong enough to talk about what had happened? How he had left me? There was no one, not even Jake, who I had explained it all to, told his hurtful words to...

I was still not entirely sure I was ready for this, but I was determined to move forward with my life and facing the house and the family inside was an essential part of that process. I had to do it; otherwise I feared I would be stuck with this pain forever. Besides, I really wanted to see Esme, Carlisle, and Jasper.

In pulled the truck to a stop by the porch and turned off the engine. After several deep breaths, I dragged myself out of the car and began my way up the stairs.

I noticed with a jolt that the door had already been fixed, but before I had the chance to dwell on it, it was pulled open, nearly coming off the hinges. Within seconds, Esme had dragged me into her arms.

"Ooh... little tight there, Esme," I had difficulty getting the words out and she loosened her arms considerably, although she kept them around me.

"I'm so glad you came!" She said as she kissed me lightly on the cheek, her cold lips making it smart. "I was worried you would change your mind."

"Of course not, I wanted to see you, Esme." I took her hand as she led me inside, lightly kicking the door shut.. "I'm sorry, about..." I looked down at the newly fixed door.

"Oh, don't worry Bella. I found all the letters in the box... I'm surprised that was all you did. Really, what was he thinking?"

Although her words were casual, her face tensed as she thought of Edward and I immediately felt guilty. Although I was not particularly upset about the fact he was not here, she obviously was. There was something else there as well, another emotion that I could not quite identify, if it had been anyone else I would have said it was rage, but I had never seen Esme angry before. I could only hope it would come out during our conversation, it seemed of vital importance that I not see it on her beautiful face again. Deciding to jump right in, in hope it would distract Esme from the answers she wanted from me, I quickly asked the most important question in my mind at that moment.

"What happened to them, Esme? Where are they?"

She led me through the hall to the kitchen and pulled out a chair for me.

"Would you like a drink, Bella? Juice? Tea?" I couldn't help suspect she was wasting time, but I allowed it, guessing the period since we had been separated had not been easy on her either.

"Ummm... I guess a cup of tea would be nice."

She immediately began boiling water. Her face was turned away from me but I couldn't help but assume she was upset about the conversation we were about to have. I stayed silent, giving her a moment to compose herself as the water boiled and she set out a teapot, bowl of sugar and jug of milk. When she opened the fridge I was surprised to see it fully stocked for the first time.

"I hope this is okay for you, dear. It's been a long time since I have made tea." She said as she placed everything in front of me, along with a plate of cookies.

"This is too much, Esme. Really, you shouldn't have."

"Oh it's nothing dear. Honestly I don't know why we never thought of having stuff here for you all the time before." She sat down opposite me fidgeting lightly with her hands. I had never seen a vampire fidget before, and it was bizarre to watch.

"Esme, what happened since you left?"

She laughed, but it was forced.

"Bella, I thought I was to be the one comforting you. I want to hear about what happened here."

I shuddered lightly. Although I felt comfortable enough here with Esme I wasn't sure I could admit to her just how bad it had been for me in the months after they had all left. A part of me worried she and the others would think less of me.

"I don't..." I stumbled over the words and felt a blush filling my cheeks. "I don't know if I'm ready yet..."

Esme smiled across the table in understanding.

"Of course dear. Why don't I go first and then maybe you could talk after..."

I nodded but I still wasn't sure I could do it. Esme spoke of comforting me, but how could I tell her the horrible thing that he had said without hurting her as much as it would hurt me to rehash them.

"Well, where to start?" Esme reached over and took my hand.

"How about the start?" I looked up at her. "What happened right after my party?"

"Well..." I relaxed into the sound of her voice, occasionally sipping my tea as I listened. "The last I saw of you was when we were dragging Jasper outside. It's lucky Emmett is so strong; he managed to keep a hold of him till we got outside into the fresh air. He sobered up pretty quickly when he was away from your scent and before we knew it, he had got free of Emmett and he just began running... He felt terrible about what happened Bella. Jasper has had more...difficulty than us with this diet, but he truly doesn't want to hurt anyone."

"Esme!" I interrupted her with more force than I intended. "I never blamed Jasper for what happened! I cut my finger in a house full of vampires! To be honest, I'm surprised more of you didn't go for me." I laughed, one of my first genuine laughs in a long time.

"You always astound me, Bella." I looked up and she was staring at me in what I could only describe as shock and awe. It made me feel incredibly awkward. I shrugged, disconcertedly, unsure of how to react.

"Keep going, Esme, please..." I was getting incredibly unnerved by how she was watching me, so I looked down at the cup of tea I was holding tightly.

"I'm sorry Bella, you just surprise me..." She looked unhappily down at her hands and I knew what she was going to tell me next would be upsetting. "As soon as Jasper took off, we tried to follow him. He's incredibly fast and without Edward or Alice to help us out we were kind of left in the lurch, unfortunately none of the three of us are particularly good at tracking..."

"Wait." I interrupted again. "I thought Edward went after him. He couldn't be around me so he left minutes after it happened."

"Yes", Esme's eyebrows furrowed. "Carlisle mentioned it to me later that night. Neither he nor Alice came to find us... Although I can hardly blame him; it would have done no good whatsoever to come speak to Jasper while he was so angry."

"Edward was angry?" An image of his face the first day we had met flashed across my mind and I shuddered. Although I was sure he would do nothing to hurt his brother, even if he had managed to hide the anger on his face Jasper would have felt it coming from him.

"He never said so... Edward was always so calm, far more detached than the rest of us, until he met you. That's why we were all so happy when the two of you became close."

This wasn't the way I wanted this conversation to go. I had been hoping that by asking about what had happened since their departure, I would avoid the discussion of our relationship. I began to clam up. Esme was still talking about how much I had changed Edward, but I was trying to block it out.

"Esme!" I stopped her and she caught herself. She looked at my face and her own fell.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I wasn't thinking..."

I waved my hand as nonchalantly as I could.

"Jasper ran straight to Denali. We caught up with him in the early hours of the next morning," she said, returning to the story I wanted to hear. "Only Carlisle, Alice and Edward remained here. We spoke to them daily, but even Carlisle could not reveal much other than the fact you were not badly hurt. He begged Edward to let him see you. He wanted to check on your wound and your wellbeing, but Edward said you did not want to see anyone and then... and then two days later, we got the call from Carlisle to let us know you had broken up with Edward..."

She paused, regret, pain and anger all battling for dominance on her face.

"We were all devastated, Jasper particularly. He blamed himself for it all; he had planned to come back, to apologise to you for everything. He was willing to leave the family if it would bring you and Edward back together, but Edward stopped him. He never revealed what had been said between the two of you."

I frowned at this but kept myself silent. Of course he never spoke of it – it had never happened!

"Obviously we know why now..." she frowned at the table and I understood her frustration. Edward was her son and his lies made no sense. Why could he not have simply told them the truth? Maybe he thought they would try and change his mind? Maybe he was simply too ashamed to admit what he had said to me...

"Carlisle arrived with Alice and Edward early the morning after. We tried to speak to him about what had happened but he refused. None of us were surprised, and when he told us it was your wish, that we never bother you again, we did not question it. I know we should have." She looked up at me and slipped her hand into mine. "We should have questioned him more, but none of us wanted to cause him anymore hurt. He left not long after, claiming he needed some time alone. Alice told us she could see him travelling; she said he would return when he was ready..."

Once again the story had turned into a story about Edward, but I didn't stop her this time. I wanted to know what the hell had led to the situation we were all in now. Alice and Edward missing, the family that I had thought so strong now splintered.

"We barely spoke to him after he left; he refused to take any of our calls. Carlisle managed to reach him only once, and he reassured us he was ok, that he was continuing with our diet. We remained in Denali. We have a house out there we can use near our cousins. We barely spoke to one another for months. Even Carlisle and I found it difficult to be around each other; everyone was so wrapped up in their own pain, they were unable to help with anyone else's... I can only imagine the pain you felt without anyone around who understood what had happened."

She gazed up at me from underneath her thick eyelashes and I swallowed nervously.

"Then again," she began speaking again quickly, "I suppose you did have someone to speak to. You and Jacob Black seem very close..." She gazed at me meaningfully and I had to do my best not to laugh. Apparently, my surrogate vampire mother wanted to know details on my love life.

"Jake and I are _friends_, nothing else." She looked at me again, questioningly. "Seriously, why does nobody believe me? Jake's like a brother. He... he saved me when I thought there was nothing left to be saved." Her expression was still probing, but she didn't say anything. "I love Jake, Esme. He's my brother. He is as much my family as... as you are."

I heard a sob and the next minute I was wrapped up in Esme's arms once more. Obviously realising my shock she quickly let go and I swear she would have been crying if she could, gazing down at me lovingly.

"I'm sorry Bella. It's just after everything that's happened... well I wasn't sure what you would think of us..." Her eyes filled with tears that I knew would never fall and she gasped, almost as though she were crying. "Bella, I have, and will always, think of you as my daughter."

I think it was in that moment that I truly realised it. They, or at least she, had missed me as much as I had missed them. With a distinct lack of grace I fell back into her waiting arms, desperate for any comfort she could give me.

As soon as I reached her I felt my chest constrict, my breathing became laborious, everything Edward had said to me that day echoing round in my head.

"He said he didn't want me," I stuttered into Esme's shoulder. "He said I was a distraction, that my mind was a sieve, that I would forget all of you. I never forgot you Esme..."

Suddenly the pain of it all came crashing back on me. It was all I could focus on, filling every inch of me and I fell into it, unable to hold back from it any longer. It was worse than any bruise, any break, any of the various injuries I had sustained in the past. It was worse even than the spread of the venom when James had bit me the year before. It was never ending but at the same time I knew it must get better. Esme was here with me, Carlisle and Jasper were no doubt close. As long as they were here I would be okay.

I didn't realise the guttural noise of pain in the room was coming from me until it had softened into whimpers. I tried to stop them and focussed on my breathing. In and out, in and out and slowly the noise lessened. I could feel cold arms around me and realised my eyes were screwed shut. Oh god, what Esme must think of me? Had anyone else been here to see my total breakdown...Taking in one last breath, in and out, I opened my eyes and nearly jumped with fright.

We had moved to the living room and I was clinging, literally clinging, like my life depended on it, to Jasper.

I realised he was holding me close to him too, his arms wrapped around me and my head lying on his muscular chest. My eyes glanced across it, tightly encased by a black t-shirt, wet with my tears and I for some reason the first thing I thought was how perfect Jasper's chest looked. I was immediately ashamed as I realised that Jasper would have felt my entirely inappropriate response to him. He cleared his throat, unnecessarily, and I glanced up. It was only at that moment I noticed Esme and Carlisle sitting at either side of us, both of them looking anxiously at me.

I looked up and saw Jasper's lips move but I could not hear what he was saying. What was he telling them? _Please don't let them know what I was feeling just then_! I silently screamed at him. My heart started to pound while my face reddened at the thought, but before I could begin a full out panic a feeling of what I could only describe as manufactured calm settled over me. It was like nothing I had ever felt before. I knew the emotion was not mine but I could feel it all over me. I slowly tried to peel it away from me, separating it from my mind and my body and after a moment it disappeared. I turned and glared at Jasper, who looked down on me, eyes wide with shock. Feeling unsure how to react at the comical look on his face, I stuck my tongue out at him.

His laugh reverberated deep in his chest beneath me as his pale lips pulled over his white teeth. Looking at them now, I could hardly believe less than a year ago he had tried to bite me with that beautiful mouth.

Damn, not again Bella! What the hell is going on with me? Now was not the time to start acting like a horny teenager.

I dared a glance at Esme, still partially convinced Jasper had told her about what I was feeling as I came round. If he had she showed no signs of it. Her face was still pinched with worry and I tried to give her a small smile as I sat myself up and tried to disentangle myself from Jasper's muscular arms.

Fuck, you do remember Jasper, don't you Bella? Your best friend's husband, not that she had been much of a best friend recently... but that still didn't matter. You don't lust after people's husbands. It just isn't right.

"Don't worry, Esme," I looked up at her as I straightened my clothes, which were now rumpled to go with my knotted hair. "I think I'm okay now." I felt myself blush again and looked at my feet in an attempt to hide it. "I'm so sorry for making such a scene... "

I glanced round as I heard Carlisle move towards me slowly.

"Bella," he started but then paused, obviously unsure what to say.

"I'm okay, really. I think I had just been pushing stuff down for so long... I didn't really know what to do when it all came out."

Carlisle nodded and came up to put a fatherly hand on my shoulder.

"You know if you ever need me Bella, I am only a phone call away," I nodded and gratefully lent into his shoulder, exhausted by my epic emotional outburst. His watch was just in front of my face and I jumped when I realised the time. Ten to nine! How had it gotten so late? I couldn't remember if the pack had organised to meet with the Cullen's again tonight and I did not want to miss it if they did but I needed to get some sleep if I was going to have any chance of going to school tomorrow. I had been hoping to eat and sleep early seeing as Charlie was away.

"Carlisle, did you arrange to meet the pack again?" I asked, trying to bring myself back to the practicalities of tonight instead of my emotional reactions.

"Yes, as a matter of fact we plan to meet them tonight, same time, same place. We need to work out a schedule so someone is keeping an eye on you at all times." I made a face at the thought of them all stopping their lives in order to keep watch on me, but didn't say anything until he had finished.

"I'm coming." Carlisle looked like he was going to disagree, but instead Jasper's voice interrupted from where he was, still seated on the couch.

"Of course you can come Bella. You were kind enough to organise our meeting last night, it's only right you come tonight as well."

"Great!" I tried to move on quickly. Now I had what I needed I had the overwhelming urge to run from the situation. "Well I should probably be going... I really wanna try and get some sleep before tonight." I glanced awkwardly around the room. I really wasn't sure what you were meant to say when you had just had a nervous breakdown of some kind in front of people. I didn't even want to think about what Jasper was thinking about me. "Ummm... thanks, for everything, really."

"It's our pleasure Bella, really, as long as you are okay," Esme was at my arm again and I nodded to reassure her.

"Yes, yes, don't worry. I'll see you this evening." I was already grabbing my keys and bag from the kitchen and making my way towards the door. I quickly hugged Esme and Carlisle as they watched my sudden change in demeanour with shock while Jasper smirked, still in the chair.

I assured them Jake would be picking me up again for the meeting tonight, not giving them a chance to offer to take me instead and jumped in the cab. My mind was swimming. I didn't know how to handle all the emotions swirling around me. The pain that had dominated my life for so long now was still there, but at the same time there was hope, love, so many things I thought I had forgotten...

I pulled the car out the drive and sent off a quick text to Jake letting him know I would need to be picked up that night before settling back into my thoughts for the drive home. I only had a couple of hours to sort out my head for tonight.

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**As always thanks for reading guys! I know I didn't manage to respond to all of you but I really appreciated everything you had to say, it means so much to me that all of you are reading this. Special thanks to TheLadyKT who reviewed every chapter so far - you're a superstar darlin'! **

**Oh, and if anyone is looking for a new fic to check out, try Deuces, by WhitlocksBaby, it's very AU, dark and freaking brilliant and has had me on my toes for the past few weeks! **

**Keep in touch! I'm thinking of Jasper's pov next, and would love to hear any suggestions you have :) xox  
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	10. Chapter 10

**Sorry this is so late, crazy start of term along with illness and writers block made me ridiculously unproductive. **

**Just in case you need a recap of what is going in, Esme has returned to Forks on a search for Edward and Alice, who disappeared after hearing Bella had 'died'. Unhappy with what she hears from Bella, Esme calls in reinforcements in the form of Carlisle and Jasper. Last chapter Bella had a bit of a breakdown during a conversation with Esme and ended up being comforted by our favourite cowboy.  
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**As always, thanks to my amazing beta heavyinfinity - this chapter never would have happened without you, and Nissa-Cullen my awesome pre-reader. You guys are freaking brilliant. Any mistakes are me falling asleep at the keyboard when I was finishing it off last night.  
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**10. Alexander  
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_Jasper_

Bella wasted no time in leaving the house and jumping into her decrepit truck; her relief was palatable when it started on the first try. I was surprised to see the old thing was still working. It had to be at least as old as her father was, if not older. I had raised my concerns about it with Rosalie the year before, but she assured me it was in working order, and her emotions had told me not to bother asking again. Now it seemed like the truck was in better condition than Bella herself.

Despite Esme's warning about Bella's appearance before our encounter, seeing Bella last night had stunned me. Her clothes were practically hanging off her thin frame, and her eyes empty of the spark that had made her so intriguing, even though she was human. She was not the same girl we had left all those months ago.

I heard the door close followed by the sound of light footsteps as Esme and Carlisle returned to the living room. They were both visibly distressed by what had just happened. Esme was practically trembling with a mixture of sorrow and rage, which I could only assume she was directing at Edward. I shared her sentiments entirely.

Carlisle pulled Esme onto the sofa across from where I stood and stroked her back. She was still upset so I sent her a little bit of calm to make it easier for her to talk.

"So, can someone fill me in on what was going on before this happened?" Carlisle asked, his attention still focussed on Esme.

"We were just talking," she managed to choke out. "She was asking about what we were doing after we left Forks. She was quieter than she used to be but she seemed to be okay."

"She was okay, Esme," I interrupted her, unwilling to hear and feel her guilt any longer. "I was upstairs because I wasn't sure she would talk openly if she knew I was here," I explained to Carlisle. "She was painfully nervous and slightly ashamed on the drive up here, but I think that might have been more to do with the front door than anything else. After you reassured her, she calmed down considerably. She was nervous when you spoke, but no more than was warranted for the situation."

"It was my fault; I overwhelmed her. I shouldn't have mentioned Edward." Esme's distress was increasing quickly and I quickly pushed enough calm her way to knock out a small elephant.

"Esme!" She jumped at the hard tone of my voice but I was keeping her so calm she could not react verbally. Carlisle just glowered at me for yelling at his wife. "Bella was happy to be talking to you. I felt her emotions; she missed you. She did tense up when _Edward's _name came up, but I don't think it was why she broke down."

"What do you mean?" Carlisle asked, his natural inquisitiveness overshadowing the anger he still felt towards me for raising my voice to Esme. To be honest, she had needed it.

"When you called her part of the family she was ecstatic. Her happiness actually made me giddy, but I don't think she was prepared for feeling it." I tried vainly to search for the right words to describe what I believed had happened to Bella. "I think it overwhelmed her. She appears to have been pushing down a lot of her emotions, probably so she could just get through the day since we left. When one came out, they all followed."

"I suppose that makes sense," Carlisle said thoughtfully. "Truly, I haven't done much study about mental health, but I could do some research. I don't like the idea of our little girl hurting and not being able to do anything about it."

I had to agree with him there. Seeing Bella, feeling Bella, like that had given me an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach I couldn't ignore.

"Charlie said it was worse just after we left," Esme said morosely.

Carlisle pulled her closer to him on the sofa, his love and adoration for the woman beside him filling the room. "It's okay, my darling. We're back now and we will take care of her. She won't be hurt again." His steely resolve was evident on his face and I was suddenly glad that I was on Carlisle's good side. Although he was a kind, caring man, Carlisle was also determined. When he wanted something he got it. His commitment and hard work had given him the strength to be the first vegetarian vampire of all time. It had also allowed him to become a doctor. Before him, no vampire would have thought of it, let alone attempted. If he said Bella would be safe, he meant it. Of course it would to be much easier with my help.

Esme had thrown herself into her husband's arms at his commanding reassurances and I quickly made my excuses and backed out the door to allow them some privacy.

Although I had hunted the previous evening I did not want to take any risks, so I made my way upstairs, bypassing my old room on the second floor and heading directly up to my study in the attic. The majority of my things were up here anyway, having been deemed unsuitable for Alice's sensitive fashion and interior tastes.

I grabbed a well-worn pair of hiking boots from the closet and was about to head back to check on Esme when I felt a megafuckton of lust from downstairs, followed by a very girly giggle. Apparently the calm I had covering the house was no longer needed.

I opened the small window and perched on the ledge briefly before launching my body into the air. I landed in a roll, about half way to the trees at the back of the house, and used the momentum of my jump to get up and start running. Less than a second after leaving the house, I was already in the trees, and within moments I could no longer hear or feel what Carlisle and Esme were doing with one another. Not that I could blame them; hunting would not have been my first choice to take the edge off if I had any other options.

I took a deep breath when I knew I was away from civilisation and was shocked when Bella's scent hit me. I glanced around in confusion before realising that the scent came from me. I was still wearing the t-shirt I had on when she was been crying and her unique freesia and roses smell was mixed with the salt of her tears. I could see the lines they had made as they dried on the fabric.

I tried briefly to hunt again, but it was pointless; every time I came close to getting myself in the right frame of mind, Bella's scent would hit me again and I got distracted. My mind still couldn't get around the huge changes in her since the last time I had seen her. Her bones were sticking out, obvious even under her baggy clothes. The bags under the eyes were not recent; her whole face seemed to have sunken, something you frequently saw in insomniacs, and her hair, while clean, was limp. In truth, she looked malnourished, something I had rarely seen in the US for the past 40 years.

Shockingly, her severe weight-loss did not appear to have affected her physical development, both her body and her face had a slightly different shape than last year. Her face was thinner, and slightly longer than before. Her cheekbones were almost sharp, which gave her a more sophisticated look and it emphasised her deep brown eyes.

She had also filled out, despite her skinny frame. When I had held her earlier I had hoped it would help me calm her emotions, but instead, it had just stirred up any number in myself. Her hips had widened slightly, her ample bosom more obvious after her weight loss, and it was impossible not to notice how beautiful she was becoming.

The smell of a predator close to me pulled me back to reality, and the reality was that I had no business noticing Bella that way.

Bella was a friend, family even, and human at that. I had never thought of her as, well, anything other than Edward's girlfriend before. Her emotions from earlier were obviously clouding my thinking. Besides, you can hardly blame a man for thinking about it. It had been over a year since I had any type of release. Not since Alice and I had lost Bella in Phoenix.

Alice.

Even thinking of her was still physically painful, and the pain was made worse by the fact I simply did not know what had happened to us.

That damn pixie had been my entire life for so long; for the past sixty years she had been my everything. I had been so lost when she found me, so desperately unhappy with my life, and she had been so positive, a bright ball of energy literally filling my world with her. It had seemed so simple when she told me she would take me to the Cullen's, help me adapt to their lifestyle, give me freedom from my constant guilt, and in return I would love her. It had seemed so simple at first. Her happiness carried me through the two years it took us to find them and again through my period of difficulty when I initially stopped feeding on humans.

For so many years we had been happy. Sure, I had changed for her, but it was what I wanted. I wore what she found attractive, I suppressed my accent to help us fit in, but sometimes it felt like I hadn't done enough. I had always listened to her, and taken her and Edward's constant vigilance of me in good grace, but the only time I needed her, she had failed. I had failed.

I had asked Alice the evening of Bella's birthday whether I needed to hunt, but she had assured me it would be okay, that she did not foresee anything going wrong. Of course, I had not told anyone that information; there was no reason the family should blame Alice as well for what had happened, but despite my support of her she seemed to blame me also. I had felt the sorrow she had directed at me as Emmett and Rose dragged me from the house, and when she did not try to follow me, I knew I had messed up badly.

By the time I got to speak to her next, it was three days later in Denali after Bella had supposedly broken up with Edward. Dammit, I knew there was something funny about his emotions when he got back. If I had tried harder to talk to him, could I have gotten the truth out of him? Neither of them had spoken to me after Bella's birthday, although I don't think anyone else noticed. Edward was gone too quickly for me to truly try to sit down with him but Alice was another story. She allowed me to sit with her, but would not speak a word to me and frequently seemed unable to even look at me. I could feel disappointment coming off her in constant waves, but when I tried to address it, she would simply get up and leave the room, allowing her to return to her visions.

Thinking about it now, I could only imagine she knew about Edward's deception from the start; it would have been difficult, if not impossible, for him to make the decision without her picking up on something. Maybe she was watching Bella all that time, trying to find out if her friend was okay while Edward was out of mindsight.

And then, she had left so suddenly, taking off out the door while I was showering upstairs, not bothering to say goodbye. The note she left addressed to Carlisle, not me. My mate, my wife, my Alice, who I had followed, who I had changed for, could not even bare to write my name on a piece of paper.

I could feel their pity when the rest of the family found me sitting on the floor in the kitchen, the open note on the table. I hadn't been able to resist reading it. After reading Alice's words, I wished I had fought that impulse harder.

Everything changed when Esme had called with the news about Bella; suddenly, everyone had energy again, there was hope in the house, and I had followed it back to Forks.

The first night back, I went up to the room I had shared with Alice while Carlisle had his conversation with Bella. I needed to see what was still there, but I also needed to know if seeing the room it had all come apart in would give me any answers. The bed remained, along with pillows and a duvet but there was no bedding. The various pieces of artwork that adorned the walls were gone, along with the small collection of books I kept in our room.

I opened the closet.

Her clothes were gone too; every item but a pair of black socks and a t-shirt that she had borrowed from me when we first painted the house. I could smell fabric though. Denim, cotton, silk and wool all wafted through the air and I followed it to the back of the huge closet to the drawers that were mine. My clothes were still there, the t-shirts neatly folded alongside the jeans I never wore because she hated them so. The tailored trousers she preferred were hanging in the closet, along with the ridiculous selection of shirts she had insisted I needed. My suits came next, all perfectly tailored to fit me, a couple of which probably cost more than Carlisle's car.

The only things missing were a couple of long sleeved t-shirt, cargo pants and sweaters. I could still smell myself on what remained, untouched since I had packed it in the back of the closet all that time ago.

There were even boxes of my books at the bottom. She had moved them, not taken them, but moved them.

My mind went blank and my movements became automatic as I walked to the back of the walk in wardrobe and deftly pulled up the third floorboard from the end. It was the perfect hiding place, really. No one would dare come in Alice's closet without her but me, so she was the only one who knew about the secret compartment under the back of it. I had no idea what whether anything was still stored in the fireproof inside the compartment, but Alice's scent was prominent.

I inhaled deeply, and Alice's unique scent invaded me. It was a mix of rich wood, sweet candy, and tangy undertones of salt. It was older than I expected though, tainted by its time in the dusty hole underneath the floor. It was definitely older than the diluted smell in the rest of the house, I placed it as no older than a year.

Cautiously I opened the latch.

As soon as the scent of the package inside wafted out I froze. My thoughts racing, I slowly and carefully pulled the old wooden box from the fireproof container. As I pulled it out, my body sagged, and I placed it on the floor in front of me. I sat down and crossed my legs, starring at the box in front of me. The familiar scent of the aging materials enveloped me, the sharp tang of ink from the few papers I kept and the familiar scent of gunpowder taking me back to another time.

There was something wrong though; there was a different scent in there now, fresher than that of the few precious items I had saved over the past 150 years. Lifting the lid, the intruder was immediately obvious. On top of the meagre collection that surmounted all I knew of my past was a thick piece of paper, folded, with my name written in Alice's elegant script.

I pulled the offending item out and carefully closed the lid again, slipping it back into its hiding and fixing the floor before looking down at the piece of paper in front of me. It looked innocent enough... the white of the paper, the slightly faded ink covering it, but it still caused me to feel dread and hope at the same time.

Unwilling to prolong my torment any further, I slipped the sheet open, preparing myself for whatever it said.

_I hope you never see this, but if you do, it was the only way. _

Frantically I turned it over, looking for any other words, anything more than the single sentence written before me. Everything I had hoped I would find, everything I had dreaded reading, and she had given me nothing. No apology, no explanation, no help whatsoever. She had obviously known it was a possibility that I would return here without her, and yet she did not even apologise. She was merely trying to justify herself.

A white hot rage filled me, the disappointment, the anger, and the shame of the past few months finally bursting out. I made no noise as I tore at the paper, tiny pieces of it flying round the room as I shredded it, over and over till it was just dust in my hands. As soon as I was done, I started on the clothes, ripping every reminder of Alice in the wardrobe into small pieces until I was surrounded by thousands of tiny strips of fabric.

After the last item, an ugly burnt orange tie, was added to the pile I stopped. The devastation was immediately apparent. The whole room was in shambles; hangers were torn from their place, drawers were opened and let hanging haphazardly, waiting to fall into the mess on the floor. My outburst had been silent though, and I could hear Esme and Carlisle, oblivious downstairs.

I stalked out of the room and closed the door, sinking to the floor, my eyes never leaving the wardrobe until Carlisle found me a couple of hours later.

Thinking about it now, my outburst seemed worryingly similar to Bella's. We had been pushed, beyond what we were capable of dealing with and we had dealt with it the only way we could My outlet was through anger, hers was tears. Maybe since our reactions were so much alike, I could help her deal with the aftermath of her outburst.

Wait a second, what was I thinking? I couldn't afford to allow myself to get close to Bella. What if she fell around me? Or, god forbid, went near another piece of paper? After so long away from any temptation, there was no way I could be trusted with her. I would have to desensitise myself again. It was necessary anyway. Beyond Alice's promise to help me with my depression, I had also joined the Cullens to do something very few vampires got to do... to be a part of the world. Just because Alice had decided to disappear, presumably to comfort Edward over his lost love, did not mean I had to give up what I had worked so hard towards.

Then again, seeing Bella had not been too bad today. Sure, her scent on my shirt was still distracting me now, but I had held her earlier as I tried to comfort her, and at no point had I desired her blood. Obviously, part of that was due to the distraction caused by the torrent of emotions from both Bella and Esme, but there was more to it. Without the pressure of everyone else's bloodlust I found it easier to be near the small girl who had taken us so willingly into her life. Esme could never think of Bella as a meal, and Carlisle's control was close to, if not completely, perfect. Being around Bella with them was considerably easier than when she had been glued to Edward's side, forcing him to control the vampire part of him always fighting to kill her.

I didn't realise I had done a circuit until I got back to the house, too involved in my thoughts to have actually hunted. It was quite fortunate really, the emotions Carlilse and Esme were throwing out were still at fever pitch. I gladly turned myself around and began to run for into the forest again, stripping my t-shirt off in the hope it would keep Bella off my mind.

Usually I wasn't keen on wandering round shirtless. Most people, vampire or otherwise cringed when they saw the scars littered across my body. I knew it was highly unlikely I would bump into anyone on a hunt, so I dealt with my discomfort and got on with it.

Rather than my usual hunting method based on sounds and smells, I relaxed myself and decided to feel out what was in the forest surrounding me.

Emmett had laughed at me on one of our earliest hunts together when I told him I had been able to feel the fear of the buck I had just taken down. I don't think he had truly believed me until Edward had commented about it as he was scanning my mind while I hunted. Apparently, neither one of them had ever considered the idea that our animal prey felt the same sense of the end of their lives as humans did. I knew differently; animals could feel a number of emotions, even ones that could be described as loving. Growing up on a farm, I had always believed the animals recognised us and knew we were the ones who provided them with food and cared for them when they were ill. I had dealt with the guilt of killing an animal when I was a child though, and I had no problem doing it now. I would always take the fear an animal feels over the horror of a human when hunting.

I could feel a primal hunger to the Southeast of me now. I knew it could not be human, because it was far too animalistic. One feeling, one need overpowered all others and I realised with relish there was an edge of rage to it also, the signature of a predator. I ran in the direction of it and could soon hear the sounds of a large cat, possibly a panther, not far from me. It was large, that much was sure. The branches it stood on creaked slightly under its weight and I realised it was about 100 metres upwind of a group of deer.

I decided to wait; he was so close now anyway I may as well allow him his last meal before I killed him. Besides, if I waited until he had taken one of the deer, I could disturb him while he went for the others. Predators always preferred to go down in a fight and interrupting him just after he fed would piss him off no end.

I moved lightly, circling so I was closer to the deer but not close enough to get spotted. I allowed myself to bask in the emotions of the panther as I watched him. All I could feel was a deep hunger, the need for violence in order to be fulfilled and I relished it. It was so different from bloodlust and yet so similar.

With quick movements, the panther leapt gracefully from one tree branch to another until he was right below me. I stayed completely still as he planned his last move and dived into the herd of deer. He was lethal, one powerful claw hit the neck of the doe at the edge of the group while he caught a second in his strong jaw. The satisfaction he felt hit me hard.

That was my signal. From just above him I dove in as the rest of the deer took off running into the forest.

The panther turned to me and I felt his rage, his desperate need to defend his kill, and I lost it. Planting one foot in front of the other, I launched myself at him. He was quicker than I expected and tried to bat at me, but his claws could not penetrate me the way they could the deer and he only succeeded in tossing me past him.

He didn't turn quickly enough though, and moments later, I was on his back. He rolled, attempting to dislodge me, but I gripped around his rib cage and moved my arms around his neck. I snapped it before he could realize what had happened.

It took me less than a second to sink my teeth into his neck, latching on to his jugular and drinking deeply and greedily, the fire in my throat briefly suppressed. When he was completely drained, I turned my attention to the two deer. One was definitely dead, but the other was trying desperately to escape. Now that my attention was no longer on the panther, the pain coming from it was distressing.

Leaning over her, I sent out as much comfort as I could before snapping her neck and drinking again. By the time I got to the final part of my meal, I could feel the blood sloshing around my insides. However, my mother always taught me not to waste my food, so I bent down and drank the steadily cooling blood as quickly as possible.

Disposing of the body was no problem as there were plenty of scavengers about. In fact, I was sure their numbers had increased since we had moved to the area and we would spread the flesh of anything we drank from in various areas away from human populations. Emmett liked to put the remains in a couple of places, using the frequent deposits as traps for bears. I wasn't sure it was effective, but it made him happy.

After dealing with the bodies, I started making my way back to the house once again.

When I arrived, I was relieved to feel a mixture of wonder, contentment, and love from the house, indicating they were finished with their amorous activities. I decided to check in with Esme, whom I could see in the kitchen. I could feel the mixture of caring, compassion, happiness, slight worry, and love that defined Esme to me. There was something else as well though, a touch of disgust mixed in with her motherly feelings.

I grabbed the t-shirt I had left by the tree line and slipped it back on before walking in through the back door.

The reason for her disgust became apparent as soon as I walked through the door.

Esme was standing in the centre of the kitchen holding what looked like a tin of cat food at arms distance away from her while she spooned it into a bowl.

"What is that atrocious smell?" The combination os something oily, flesh, and water permeated the kitchen. It was striking similar to the smell after a flood.

"Tuna fish," Esme told me as she put down the tin and began mixing the pinky grey mess in the bowl.

"That doesn't look like fish, Esme. Are you sure you got the right thing? Did you maybe get pet food instead?"

I tried to look ashamed when she scowled at me. I knew very well that she would never try to feed Bella cat food, but that stuff smelt seriously wrong. She must have read the can wrong.

"I didn't buy it, Carlisle did, and you can check the can if you want. It is most definitely for people," she said sourly.

"Esme there is a picture of dolphin on here. Are you sure it isn't fish food?" I wasn't actually feeling any better looking at the can. How could Carlisle have possibly have thought this looked appetising? Getting closer to the smell was making my stomach turn.

"And, there is a picture of a girl eating a sandwich on the back, Jasper. It is definitely for humans. Besides, Carlisle says it is good for her, something about smelling in iron deficiency in her blood. She's not been taking care of herself..." Esme's eyes clouded and I moved around to stand next to her, taking the bowl of tuna and mayonnaise away from her lightly and continuing to mix it as she collected herself.

"Well, it is a good thing she has you now. I'm relatively sure between us we can feed her back to health by the time the school year ends."

Esme looked up at me and smiled. Her love for all of us was so pure. It was the same love I felt between human mothers and their children and I revelled in it. Then I became aware of another emotion I had not noticed until now. When Esme looked at me, she felt pride as well.

"You did really well today, Jasper. I know you were nervous about being around humans again, and honestly, I was worried too, having Bella in the house and knowing how incredibly accident prone she is, but you were amazing." Esme smiled at me. Although I had realised the same thing earlier, I can't deny it felt pretty good to know she noticed too. I sent her my gratitude.

"She was upset," I said with a shrug. Esme nodded, urging me on. "I didn't even think of her blood, only the pain she was feeling and how I could help her."

Esme walked towards me and I started in surprise. It was rare anyone other than Alice in the family got too close to me. Not that I blamed them. It was in their natures to be nervous of me; to another vampire I screamed danger. So when Esme approached me I immediately tensed, ready for an attack, but her emotions quickly told me to relax. The pride and love were there, even stronger than before, and it wasn't till Esme had her arms around my tense form that I realised she was hugging me.

As I had done during Bella's hug last night, I relaxed into it, although it held a completely different draw than Bella's. This was pure comfort, parental and reassuring, close but not intimate. Esme ended the embrace with a light kiss on my cheek.

I didn't really know what to do, so I made my excuses and left, but not before I heard a light laugh from Esme at my obvious discomfort.

I wandered up the stairs slowly, sighing with relief as the smell of tuna become less by the time I reached Carlisle's closed door. I didn't want to interrupt him, but it was rare for the door to be shut, so I stood for a moment trying to decide what to do. My problem was solved when I heard Carlisle speak from the other side of the door.

"Come in Jasper, I'm not looking for privacy, just hoping to protect the room from the smell of fish. It seems I am going to have to find another way to ensure Bella gets the iron she needs. There is no way I am letting that foul smelling stuff in the house again." I laughed at Carlisle's obvious annoyance at himself and slipped the door open before quickly closing it again.

Carlisle's plan seemed to have worked, and the fishy smell was far less apparent in here, although I was aware of the fact some hung on me.

"Have you found anything yet, Carlisle?" I desperately wanted to know if he had a plan to help Bella yet.

"Nothing particularly helpful. As I said, psychology has never been my particular area of interest and I haven't done any reading on it since my required course last time we were all at college." My face must have fallen at his words because he glanced at me with a worried expression.

"You seem very concerned about this Jasper. Is there anything you aren't telling me about Bella's feelings? Do we need to be worried about her safety?"

"No, don't worry Carlisle. I haven't felt anything that desperate from her. I just hate knowing the pain she is in. It's not that fair she should feels this way. I'll help in any way possible. Let me know if there is any reading I can do."

"Of course, son, but don't you think you should concentrate on your own pain? Are you maybe focussing on helping Bella in order to forget about the issues you need to deal with yourself?"

I hadn't thought of that, but as soon as he said it I knew it was not the case. My concern for Bella was perfectly normal. In fact it was helping me deal with my own stuff. Watching her and feeling her emotions was helping me identify my own. I didn't know how to explain it to Carlisle though, so I brushed him off, making the excuse that I wanted to shower before returning to the fishy hallway and up to my study. I only had an hour or so before we met with the wolves again, and that meant seeing Bella.

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**Again, sorry for the wait, but I hope a little glimpse into Jasper's mind makes up for it. As always, thanks for reading, now go press that button and let me know what you think! **

**I'm off to work on the next chapter :D **


	11. Chapter 11

**Wow, you guys really blew me away with your reviews about Jasper's pov - thanks so much! I figured the best way of showing my appreciation was another chapter, hope you like it!**

**I also just found out someone nominated me in the Gem Awards, Jasper Round. I actually squeed and ran around the room, so if it was you, thank you so much! This story is up for six categories, and there is some pretty stiff competition. Voting has already started, so if you haven't been already, check it out at  
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**There are some awesome stories up there if you are looking for something to read.  
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**As always, thanks to my amazing beta, heavyinfinity, and my pre-reader Nissa-Cullen. You guys are brilliant.  
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**11. Miranda**

_Bella_

The theme to Thundercats was vibrating in my head.

_Thunder, Thunder,_

_Thunder, Thundercats_

_Thunder, Thunder, _

_Thunder, Thundercats_

I felt like my head had barely touched the pillow when my phone started vibrating underneath my pillow, rudely awakening me. Not only that, I now had the theme from Jake's favourite childhood show stuck in my head; I never should have let him near my phone. What was a wolf boy doing watching a show about giant cats anyway?

With very little grace, I pulled myself out of bed, just managing to catch myself on my feet rather than falling straight to the floor. Luckily, I had been sensible last night and had left jeans and a thick jumper over the edge of the rocking chair. I scrambled to get them on, listening for any changes in Charlie's breathing next door, relieved to know he was safely back from Hoquiam.

I learnt my lesson from trying to get down the stairs last time and had agreed to let Jake carry me down from my room tonight. I was not looking forward to it. I could barely remember my trip back last night, but I knew the experience had been less than pleasant.

I hadn't been able to talk to Jake for long on the phone. He had only recently woken up when I returned from the Cullen's, and he was already late for the pack meeting so we had only managed to agree on when to meet before he had to leave. He sounded distracted though, never a good sign with Jake.

Plopping myself down in the rocking chair, I kept my eyes on the tree line, waiting for the sight of Jake coming. I was somewhat surprised when he walked round the side of the house instead. I opened the window wordlessly and stood back as he jumped gracefully into the room.

Wordlessly, I climbed on to his back and grabbed my bag as he made his way back to the window. The sight of the ground so far beneath us made me feel slightly queasy so I closed my eyes and felt the whooshing of air as we dropped to earth. Of course, Jake's judgement was perfect and I barely felt the impact of his feet hitting the earth.

He didn't let me down, instead going into a full run along the side of the house and down the street to a waiting truck.

"Is this Sam's?" I glanced at Jake, unsure.

"Yeah, but don't worry about it. How did you think we got back last night, Bells?" He laughed at me and I smiled. For some reason Jake seemed happier, more comfortable than the last time I had seen him. So much for my theory about him being distracted.

"So how did the meeting go today? Anything you can tell me?" I asked as I opened the passenger door and slipped into the seat, doing up the seatbelt.

"Well... I suppose you may as well know." His face dropped slightly and his eyes tightened. "Leah's a wolf."

I stared at him in confusion. My mind couldn't work through what he had just said. I understood that there was a new wolf but for some reason I just could not get my head around the idea it was...

"Leah?" My voice came out funny.

"Yeah," Jake's voice was rough.

"Fuck."

"Yeah."

"I didn't think girls could become wolves," I said bluntly.

"Neither did we," he admitted.

I turned to Jake, hoping he would expand but he kept his eyes on the road.

"So... Leah is a wolf. That's odd, I would have thought Quil would be next, if anyone else."

"Yeah, so did we. We were keeping an eye on him and a couple of other kids, basically anyone who seems to be having a growth spurt. We had even considered Leah's brother Seth, but we never noticed the changes she was going through. Apparently, Sam noticed her temperature rising, but just assumed she was ill."

"Wait, so you can tell? When someone is close I mean?"

Jake sighed and nodded.

"There are a couple of things to look out for. Growth spurts are a pretty good indicator, along with a shorter temper than usual, and of course the fact we run at a balmy 108. Apparently a couple of the guys noticed they had extra body hair as well..." Jake shuddered at that thought.

"So, does that mean Leah is now a six foot something bearded lady?"

Jake spluttered into the steering wheel.

"No," He grinned at me. "She looks exactly the same as she did before, maybe a bit angrier," he joked.

"But she is part of the whole pack mind deal?" I tried to imagine what it would be like as a girl having to share all your thoughts with teenage boys.

"Yeah," Jake scowled. "It's been no picnic. Trust me..." Jake looked over at me as though making a decision.

"Have you heard about Sam and Leah?" he looked appraisingly at me.

"Sam... and Leah?"

"Yeah, they were together for a couple of years before Sam started phasing. Everyone thought they were perfect together, but then he turned and one weekend Leah's cousin Emily came down from a reservation up north."

"Wait," I jumped in. "So Sam left Leah to be with Emily? What the hell?" My opinion of Sam was going downhill steeply here.

"No," Jake interrupted me. "Well, yes, but it wasn't like you think. See, after you phase, well, your love life can be difficult. No one is sure why, maybe it's to do with genetics, finding the perfect person to pass on the genes but, well, we call it imprinting."

"Imprinting?" I really had no clue what Jake was talking about here.

"Apparently, it's like being reborn, one moment your life is like, normal, well as normal as it can be for a guy who turns into a wolf, and then you see her and..." Jake's voice sounded wistful, filled with longing. "I've seen it, in Sam's mind. When he saw Emily for the first time everything stopped. It was like he had been floating before, unsure and always alone, but then he realised all of it, everything, connected to her."

We sat in silence for a moment, both processing what he had said.

"So, one day... one day will you imprint?" I didn't know why, but the idea worried me. What if I lost Jake as well? God, I'm selfish.

"Yeah, maybe, I guess. Not that it'll change anything Bells, I'll always love ya." Once again I was surprised by Jake's insight; he had obviously seen right through my worries.

"I know, Jake," I reached up and put my hand over his on the steering wheel just as he pulled off the road.

"C'mon, let's get this over with." He pulled the door open then ran round to get mine before I had my seatbelt off.

I climbed on to his back and held on tightly; he took a second to reposition my legs around his waist before he started jogging into the forest.

My mind was still on the information he had dropped on me. So Sam had been with Leah but imprinted on Emily? It didn't seem right... but at the same time I had seen how happy Sam and Emily were together. What if that wasn't even real love? The happiest couple I knew and it was all because of him imprinting on her, a biological imperative to find the best genes. I felt my face drop into a frown.

Poor Leah, I could not even imagine how horrible it was for her. She had her heart broken, only to join the pack and have everyone know her grief and... shit, she must be able to hear Sam's thoughts too. She can hear how in love with Emily he is; it must be ghastly.

I didn't say anything as we made our way through the thick trees and soon we were back in the clearing from last night. Everyone else was already there and I waved as Jake set me back on my feet. I wanted to go over and say hi to the Cullen's but I was still horribly embarrassed by my crying fit earlier. Instead I focussed on Sam, who was already talking to Carlisle. I slowly moved closer so that I could heart better. Apparently, he was explaining Leah's change to them now. I was a bit surprised but then it made sense. If anyone could help it would be Carlisle, and they had agreed to keep an open line of communication from now on.

"That certainly is an anomaly. There are no stories concerning this?" Carlisle's voice showed genuine interest. Sam looked slightly surprised at his tone as he answered.

"No, all the legends talk about the men of the tribe turning, and generally no more than three at any time... we suspect that the constant presence of such a large coven so close has caused the swell in numbers." I saw Carlisle's face fall and it looked like he was going to interrupt, probably to apologise, but Sam held his hand up, stopping him. "There is nothing that can be done now. We were simply surprised because there are other men on the reservation who would have made more sense as defenders of the tribe.

"Sam, I don't know what to say..." Carlisle began as soon as Sam had stopped talking.

"Please, there is nothing that can be done and frankly with everything that is going on at the moment, I cannot say it is entirely a bad thing. I am in a difficult position. I do not want to force my friends and family to live this way, to be forced to go through the various difficulties involved, but at the same time I want to protect the human lives around here and the only way I can do that is if we have more numbers."

"Nevertheless, I would like to offer any assistance I can with this, anything my experience can aid you with." Carlisle's look was intense and sorrowful.

"Thank you, we appreciate the offer and I will pass on the message to Leah in particular, although I am not sure it will do much good." Sam sighed and ran his fingers through his short hair. "I may be okay with what has happened to me; I was in a bad place before this, lacking purpose, and now I have that. I also have Emily, but Leah is new and she is angry at me, at life, and at you. She may not be able to able to allow herself to be helped yet."

"Still, pass on the message. I will always be willing to assist in any way I can." His response was so typically Carlisle, I couldn't help but smile. Seriously, that guy liked everyone.

"I appreciate it. Now shall we get back to the purpose of this meeting?" Sam glanced at me and I blushed. Carlisle also turned and I could see the same concerned look on his face from earlier but he quickly covered it with a smile.

"Yes, perhaps if we get it done quickly Bella will make it back in time to sleep before school."

I didn't really know what to say, so I kept quiet as the two of them turned back to one another and began working out a schedule for watching me every moment of the day and night.

I turned my attention to the rest of the group; Jake was standing by the tree line glowering slightly at Paul, who had a smug look on his face. Apparently, he was unimpressed by the conversation, because they were soon engaged in a silent argument.

Knowing when not to get involved, I turned to glance across the clearing. Jasper and Esme were also deep in conversation, but they were standing too far away for me to hear it.

I watched the two of them, and I realizes something had changed. Esme was smiling, her hand on Jasper's in a casual manner that I had never seen before.

Jasper had always seemed in some way on the periphery of the group, at least in my mind. He and Rose had always held themselves back, not just from me, but from the family in general. While they were close to their mates, they did not seem to have the same close relationship the others had.

Perhaps they found it in each other, I mused. It wasn't exactly like I had spent a lot of time with them anyway. Although I had never seen them hanging out together or whatever it was vampire friends do. They did act as twins in the whole Cullen family facade. Was this simply due to their similar looks or was there something more to it?

I looked closer at Jasper. Although I had noticed it before, his beauty was striking. Like Rosalie his face was almost perfect, with a well defined nose, large eyes, and a strong chin. They both had their trademark blonde locks, although Jasper's were decidedly darker. It was as though his hair was naturally brown but had long before been bleached by the sun. Well, I suppose that made sense; Edward had mentioned Jasper coming from the south once. Strangely, I had never noticed an accent though...

As though they both realised at once I was appraising them, both Jasper and Esme turned and began walking towards me. I panicked slightly, not wanting to have to talk about my crying fit earlier, especially while Jake was around, but I felt a sudden shot of reassurance and looked up to see Jasper smiling at me. Unlike last time, I welcomed the odd sensation of an invading emotion.

"Bella," Esme's voice tinkled. "I wasn't sure if you would be hungry, so I made you some sandwiches." I noticed the picnic bag she was carrying.

"Oh, thanks, Esme, you didn't need to do that." I blushed once more and saw Jasper try to suppress a smirk.

"Nonsense dear, I... I enjoyed it." Her smile faltered a bit at that statement and Jasper grinned even wider. I had the familiar feeling that I was out of the loop.

"Here." Esme opened the bag carefully and reached in to take out a plastic bag. Within that was a sandwich box and after Esme opened it, she quickly handed me the most tightly wrapped sandwiches I had ever seen. As I began to open the wrapper, both Jasper and Esme took a step back.

"Umm... should I be worried about what is in here?" I looked at the two of them, both backing further away from me, looks of disgust on their faces. Even Carlisle at the other end of the field had started to move away from me slowly.

For a moment, no one said anything. Esme looked embarrassed while Jasper was apparently trying not to laugh. They both still looked disgusted and I couldn't help but notice neither of them were breathing.

Eventually, Jasper spoke up.

"It's just the smell Bella... it's tuna." His face looked like that should explain everything but I had no idea what he was on about. It took me a moment to figure it out.

"You guys don't like the smell of tuna?" I asked in shock. Okay it wasn't the most pleasant smell but really, it wasn't that bad. "Then why did you make me a tuna sandwich?"

"Well, Carlisle was shopping," Esme said quickly. "And, well you know tuna is really good for you so he thought he'd get some. But then we opened it and, well, we didn't have anything else so I figured..."

I burst into laughter and walked towards her throwing my arms around her.

"Oh, Esme, thank you."

"You're welcome, Bella. Just, if you are going to eat that do you think, maybe..."

"Don't worry, Esme, I'll make sure to eat it away from you." I smiled contentedly; I had forgotten how nice it was to have someone do little things to look after me.

I backed away from the two of them, taking my sandwich with me, and dropped down on the ground close to where Jake was standing. Apparently, his argument with Paul had come to a stalemate because the two of them were standing about ten feet apart, refusing to look at one another.

"So... the leeches don't like tuna?" I turned to the sound of his voice and was glad to see the hard look he had worn when he was talking to Paul was gone.

"Apparently the smell offends them." I giggled as I desperately tried to get the cellophane off my sandwich. Seriously, had Esme vacuumed packed this thing? Jake noticed my struggles and took the sandwich, a look of disgust equal to Esme and Jasper's on his face but he quickly opened it and passed it back to me.

"Thanks." I took a bite and smiled in contentment; tuna mayonnaise with lettuce and cucumber, yum. "So... " I looked up at Jake as I swallowed. "Not a fan of tuna either?"

Jake smiled indulgently at me, "No, nothing like that. It's just it smells, you know, like them. It's not easy on the nose."

I didn't understand what he was going on about, the smell of the Cullen's was always something I had quite enjoyed, each of them distinctive but wonderful.

"But Jake, they smell so, so nice."

"Maybe to you, Bells, but to us they smell pretty bad. I'm sure they feel the same way about us."

I nodded but didn't really understand. Just another bit of weird supernatural information to store at the back of my mind. Instead, I started eating again, savouring the taste of food someone else had made me.

Carlisle and Sam were still in deep conversation and I saw Jasper go over the join them, followed quickly by Paul.

"What's going on?" I turned to Jake as he sank down on the ground next to me.

"Sam and the doc had nearly got everything sorted, just working out a few kinks, when Jasper went to ask about school. Apparently, he was thinking of trying to redo a couple of classes so there is always someone there with you but Paul isn't very happy about it. It's just a pretence though; what he is really angry about is the fact we are gonna have to pair up, and he doesn't like the idea of patrolling with a leech."

I frowned slightly at his use of the word 'leech'. It seemed almost dirty when he said it but decided against bringing it up here. I felt myself tense at the slur though.

"What's his problem?" I asked, jerking my head towards Paul who was glaring angrily at Sam.

"He doesn't think it's a good idea to team up with the lee... Cullens, and he's not the only one. Leah did not react well to the news they were back." Jake's voice suddenly dipped very low and I had to strain to hear him. "Paul doesn't think Sam is up to leading us, and of course Leah isn't particularly fond of him at the moment either."

"What do you mean? I thought the whole Alpha thing was pretty much set in stone. I mean, unless Sam dies..." I shuddered at the thought.

"Well it is, really, apart from..." Jake's voice was nervous. "Well, Billy is basically chief, you know. I mean, Sam offered me the position, but there's no way I want that kind of responsibility..."

"Wait! So, you could be Alpha?" I was having some serious difficulty thinking of Jake as the head of a pack of wolves. For some reason, the image in my head of my little brother for all intensive purposes, leading a group of wolves against vampires was unsettling.

"Well, I suppose..."

"Is that what you and Paul were talking about earlier?" I glanced up again. The meeting seemed to be rounding up. Jasper had walked back towards Esme and Paul seemed to have completely disappeared. Carlisle and Sam were still talking, but it looked more casual now, and both of their postures had relaxed.

"Yeah, but I can't talk about it now. C'mon Bells," He jumped up, offered me his hand and carefully pulled me up. "Let's go find out who is on first Bella watch." He started walking towards Sam and I followed, a scowl on my face. Maybe Carlisle was right. I was a monster magnet, no matter what I did I was always surrounded by mystical creatures; both those trying to kill me and those trying to keep me alive.

We wandered over and Jake pulled my hand into his. Both Sam and Carlisle smiled at us.

"I think we're just about done here Bella. I think we can get you home before three tonight if you are lucky," Carlisle joked.

"Sounds good," I smiled. "So, who has the lucky job of watching me tonight?" My voice gave my nerves and displeasure away. Now that I knew that I would have someone watching at all times, it all seemed a bit more real.

"I believe Mr. Black is taking you home and he will stay with you until Esme arrives in the morning. After that we'll be doing a mix of single and double shifts. If we can have a member of the pack with you at all times, there will always be back up." Carlisle's voice was casual, almost too casual, and it didn't make me feel any better.

"So that's it? Just wait and see?"

"At the moment, yes. We can always change tactics later Bella. For now we just want to keep you and Charlie safe."

"Someone's gonna be watching Charlie?" It felt like the first bit of good news I had heard all night.

"Someone will be close to him at all times; we don't want to risk Victoria trying the same thing James did."

I nodded and turned to Jake. "Well, let's get outta here... I guess I'll see you guys around..."

Jake picked me up and we started back towards the truck. I was dreading having to get up for school in the morning and without Charlie to kick me out of bed it was going to be even worse. Immediately, I felt terrible. What was I doing worrying about school when people I loved were putting their lives in jeopardy for me?

"Everything okay up there, Bells?" Jake asked, slowing to a walk, sensing my mood as usual.

"Yeah, just worried. I mean, everyone is working so hard to keep me safe, and I feel terrible. I mean, what if something happens to someone?" I became aware my voice was starting to take on a panicked edge. "What if someone gets hurt? What if she attacks while you are there? Or Sam? How would I ever face Emily again? And what about the Cullens? Esme? Carlisle? What about Jasper?"

"Bella, stop it! We are all going to be fine; you are going to be fine!" Jake pulled me off his back and into a fierce hug, crushing me tight to his warm chest and taking my feet off the ground. "We can all look after ourselves, that's why we are doing it. Jesus, you think Sam would be letting us all patrol if he didn't think we could handle ourselves? And I'm sure the good doctor feels the same way about his wife, and I don't think you have to worry about that Jasper guy."

Jake put me down and we began the short walk the rest of the way to the car hand in hand. I knew that Sam would never put any of the pack in serious danger; it was just not in his nature. And of course, Carlisle was exactly the same, but that did not mean that Victoria wouldn't try and catch them off their guard, or worse, bring someone with her.

I also knew if I didn't stop worrying about this, I would go mad. I could only hope that the knowledge that both the pack and the Cullens were protecting me was going to put her off entirely. Once again, I felt sick as an image of Esme fighting flashed through my mind, then Carlisle, then Jasper...

"Wait!" I grabbed Jake's arm and he swung round. "What did you mean I don't need to worry about Jasper?"

Jake looked vaguely worried and glanced down.

"I don't know if you've seen his arms Bells?" I nodded; the image of Jasper's arms, the way the starlight bounced of them last night seemed to be ingrained in my head. "I don't know what you know about him Bells, you never really mentioned him, but, the way he talked when he was discussing strategy for getting Victoria... he knew what he was talking about."

What did he mean? I knew Jasper's arms were different from the other Cullens', and he knew about fighting, and strategy, fuck, they were scars.

I thought back to what I knew about Jasper and realised it was in fact very little. It did make some strange type of sense though. He had been the one to kill James in the ballet studio and Edward had agreed to send me with him and Alice...

But those scars couldn't have come from that fight, it was over in seconds. What has happened to him before now to cause them?

Jake didn't say anything as we turned and continued the last of the way to the truck. Once again, Jake took the wheel and I jumped in beside him, curling my feet under my body to keep out the cold now that I was without Jake's body heat. I leaned in closer and he put his arm around me, and began driving me home.

We didn't talk on the way; I was still too wrapped up in my thoughts about on what was happening in Europe, on Carlisle and Esme, on the pack, and on Jasper.

After Jake deposited me in my room, once again via the window, I rolled over and quickly fell asleep to the sound of Charlie's snoring next door.

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**As always, thanks for reading! Everytime I see an email about a review or alert I get the goofiest grin on my face. I always do my best to respond to reviews. Speaking of which, I'm on Twitter under new_town_girl so if you wanna come chat about the fic, or anything else, I'm always happy to hear from you guys. **

**Until next time xoxo**


	12. Chapter 12

**As always, thank you to the brilliant heavyinfinity and Nissa-Cullen, this chapter would be sitting in Azkaban (aka my recycle bin) if it hadn't been for them. **

**Twilight and it's characters are the property of Stephenie Meyer. **

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**12. Marco**

_Emmett_

_A thousand pounds of pure muscle; nine feet of power towered above me, his dark fur quivering with anticipation and muscles tensing in anticipation of battle. I charged and he met me head on. Thick claws went for me, slicing through my t-shirt as I pushed him back, first one foot then two... His head went down as he tried to use his front paws to his advantage, but it only gave me better access to his neck. _

_I'm not ready to end it yet. Instead, I vault over his shoulders and wait for him to turn before I jump, grabbing his neck and taking him down. _

_We begin wrestling. He tries vainly to pin me underneath him, but it does no good. I easily slip out of every hold, until finally I pin him face down. My hands come around his neck and my teeth find the perfect spot..._

Plop-

Shit! Jumping up, I look around me for the source of the noise, but I'm completely alone.

I can hear the sounds of humans in the buildings surrounding us, although I cannot understand what they are saying. There are also the sounds of various bugs and small animals, a couple of street dogs fighting, and the ever present flow of the river, but there was nothing that explained what had distracted me from my day dream. It felt like it had been months since I had got a hold of some good bear.

In fact, it had only been six days. I had taken down a large bear just before we left Alaska, but being on the move constantly was beginning to take its toll. The flights themselves had been a nightmare; Anchorage to Seattle, Seattle to Paris and then finally Paris to Firenze.

To be truthful, I would have preferred to go anywhere other than Volterra. Taking Rosie in there went against every fibre of my being. I still didn't understand how it had all been so easy. I could only assume Carlisle had pulled some strings, although no one mentioned it. The whole situation had been surreal.

Both of us had been terrified of the prospect of coming into contact with Aro. He may not have mentioned Bella in his phone calls to Carlisle, but I was willing to bet he would not be pleased if he found out she was still alive. We could only assume he had insisted on touching Edward when they met, before they 'ran off'. Failing to keep the secret was punishable by death, no matter what the circumstances, and having Aro's favour only went so far.

As soon as we got off the plane, we knew we were not alone. It only took until we got through customs and out the door before three members of the guard flanked us. To be honest, I was expecting more flair. Sure, that Felix guy looked pretty impressive, but if I didn't know what the witch twins did I could have laughed. They were just so dainty.

Instead of heading towards Volterra, they drove us south through Tuscany. We were less than a hundred miles from Rome when they unceremoniously dumped us out the car. Alice and Edward's scents struck us immediately.

"Well... what are you doing just sitting there? Get out and track them, you fools!" Jane smirked at us as she began pushing us out the car, which was pulled onto the side of a deserted motorway. Real subtle guys.

Rosalie glanced around the car suspiciously as she stepped out before getting distracted by the scent trail leading into the woods.

"Are none of you coming?" she asked, looking Jane straight in the eye.

"No. Aro has not ordered anyone to follow them. Find them, take them home, and be quick." With that, she had shut the door, and Felix had pulled away.

Since then we had been running on the trail of our missing siblings. It was lucky Rosie and I had been practicing tracking. After our failure to find Jasper last September we had been using our hunts to brush up our skills. I had never thought we would be using our new skills so soon. We had also had the occasional phone call from Italy, passing on news of any of their numerous members who had crossed the pairs' scent.

We had followed the two of them as they headed down towards Naples and then back north again on the east coast until they went into the sea. It was a miracle we found their scents again. It had taken nearly a day, putting us nearly three behind them, but eventually Rose picked up Alice's scent on the Albanian coast. Unfortunately, she didn't find it before I had wrecked one of the satellite phones in frustration though. Ignoring the borders, we followed the trail north. They skirted Slovenia, Serbia, Hungary and Austria all in 36 hours, before they moved into Germany, and began to follow the Danube south again into dangerous territory.

Romania was another place most vampires avoided if they had any sense of self-preservation, but apparently, Alice and Edward had trusted their gifts to get them through safely. I was not so sure about our own ability to do the same.

Not that it mattered, we had lost them. We had arrived in Droberta Turna Severin 24 hours ago and we were stuck. We managed to follow them to the train station, but they had left such a multitude of trails, on and off various trains, going down lines and then doubling back on themselves, it was impossible to figure out where they had gone.

To top it all off, the sun was shining, so we were stuck in an empty, pink, house just outside the city. The TV kind of worked, so I was happy, although there wasn't much to watch considering I didn't understand the stupid language. Maybe I should learn something other than Spanish next time I go through the whole high school charade; it was getting kind of boring to watch teenagers stumble through the same phrases over and over again.

The sound of water came through the pipes above my head before I heard Rosie's footsteps as she stepped out the bath. I swear she must have been in there at least two hours. It was crazy. I mean, how dirty could she actually be?

I heard her light footsteps coming down the stairs and she wandered cautiously into the room. Our clothes had been in a complete state when we arrived this morning, so we were forced to 'borrow' some that were on a line on our way here. Hopefully the last of our American dollars would pacify whoever they had belonged to.

Rosie had been uncharacteristically relaxed about the idea of not wearing something designer. I thought she looked fantastic; her feet were bare and she had a black floor length skirt on. She was wearing a patterned top and her wet hair was loose, still hanging down her back.

She walked slowly, her hips swinging, and she smirked at me as her eyes came to rest on my chest.

"Good day dream?" She reached up and ran a finger down my neck, settling on a wet patch on my shirt. Damn, so that was what had distracted me. Fucking drooling.

I glanced down and shuffled my feet. Rose's moods had been changeable to say the least in the past couple of months and I still wasn't entirely sure whether she was going to laugh at me or chastise me. Either way, the nervous, sorry act would hopefully work wonders. I looked up, catching her eyes and trying to make my own as puppy like as possible.

She smiled indulgently at me and leaned in to kiss me on the cheek.

"How long until nightfall?" Rose asked, turning away from me and sitting on the ratty sofa.

"At least a couple of hours left... I still can't believe Alice and Edward came through here." We had found a hotel that smelt distinctly of them earlier today. It was upmarket for the area but still nothing compared to their usual accommodations. If anyone knew how to spend money in this family, it was Edward and Alice.

"We could check their credit cards again," Rose said, contemplatively. "Do you know if Jasper has got in touch with Jenks yet? If they leave the country by train they are going to need passports."

"Why the hell are they running from us anyway? It's not like there is anyone else following them. Why the hell didn't they just get on the first flight home?" I had asked myself these same questions many times over the past few days, but this was the first time I had verbalised them.

Rosie just shrugged.

The change in my wife had been dramatic over the past couple of months, and even more so over the last few days. She was going through something, but whenever I tried to talk to her about it she would brush it off. I think it had all started when we left Forks. She had been angry- angry at Jasper for losing control, angry at Edward for bringing a human into the fold in the first place, angry at Alice for not seeing what was going to happen, and angry at Bella for forcing us out of our home.

She had been terribly upset that we had to leave, which I didn't really understand. We hadn't even been planning on staying there. She and I had left at the appropriate time to tell everyone we were attending college and then we had started travelling. We had only come back for Bella's birthday because I had insisted on it. We had been planning to travel to Africa after the party.

The thought of our cancelled safari made my mouth water and my throat burn. We had not taken any time to hunt for days and it was beginning to get to me. I pulled at the collar of my stolen wifebeater uncomfortably.

"Don't worry, we'll stop to hunt soon." Rose didn't look up. Her eyes were on the map I had put on the table earlier. It showed the majority of Europe and we had marked our route meticulously. Originally, we had been hoping to make some kind of sense of Alice and Edward's movements, but we had not had any luck.

I still was not entirely sure what had happened with the two of them. Rose had told me about her conversation with Edward, and then, with more difficulty, what Alice had said when she called. Her words seemed to have shaken my wife considerably. Rose had not said anything sarcastic or mean since then, at least not about anyone other than me.

We were working on the assumption that neither of them knew that Bella was alive, but we still did not understand why they were running. Initially, we had thought the Volturi might be after them. Although Carlisle would never admit it, we knew the two of them, as well as Jasper, were of interest to Aro; he had offered them all positions in the guard before. Rosie and I were worried he had somehow tried to coerce them, or that Alice had seen something he didn't like, but that didn't seem to be the case. We knew for a fact no one else was following them, and Aro and Marcus had been nothing but helpful since we arrived. The same couldn't be said for Cauis, but he was a miserable git at the best of times. We were incredibly lucky to get any help at all from them; after our flaunting of the laws we were lucky to be alive at all.

I wandered over and lifted Rose from the chair she was sitting in and sat down in it myself, pulling her onto my lap. She wrapped one of her hands in mine before going back to the map in front of her.

"I don't know where they could be going from here," she stated, her voice full of tension "I can't imagine they would go up through Transylvania, so the only real options are north or south... Perhaps they crossed back into Serbia, hoping the river would mask their trail." She sighed in frustration and I lifted my other hand to play lightly with her hair. Her body weight shifted and she leaned back into me, taking her feet off the ground and curling into me. Her stress was evident as she pulled at her long hair.

"It's ok, shortcake, you'll see." I pulled her closer to me and felt her quake slightly. I knew she would be crying if she could.

"I just don't understand, Em. I don't understand any of it!" Her breathing hitched and her chest shook. "What happened? Edward lied to us, which frankly isn't that surprising, but Alice? And why are they running? Why are they running from us? Is it my fault? Alice said she would never forgive me; what if they are running because they don't want to see me? I should just leave, then Alice could come back to Jasper, and Edward, well who the fuck cares what Edward does? Why did he lie to us?"

Her tirade stopped and I kissed her lightly on the head as her sobs continued until the sky began tp darken. All the while, I whispered my reassurance in her ear- telling her that I would always love her, that I would always stay with her, and that no one blamed her for doing what she thought was right. Unfortunately, I didn't have the answers to her questions.

As though on a timer, Rose stood as soon as the last light left the sky and began packing our few belongings into a grubby backpack. She didn't say a word, but I could see her determination was absolute. Her lips quivered slightly, but her eyes were hard and I knew she was going to be ok.

I followed behind her, picking up what we needed and disposing of anything we didn't. I was standing behind her at the door when she turned round quickly.

"Thank you," she said, looking up at me with a soft expression, her eyes still filled with venom. "I know I'm not the easiest person to love, Em, but know that I love you with everything I am and I thank God everyday for bringing me to you." I stood dumbstruck and she smiled. I had always known how Rose felt about me, even in my first couple of years of this life when she had been scared to spend time alone with me, still raw from the pain of her own death. Man, it's a good thing she killed those guys 'cause what I would have done to them would have been so much worse. My girl didn't often talk of her feelings though. It was her emotions and actions that defined Rose, not her thoughts, one of the reasons she and Edward never got along.

Her verbal confirmation of her love for me was an unusual treat, usually only uttered when we were in bed. Not that I didn't appreciate her enthusiasm to show and tell me how much she adored me, but sometimes a man likes to know he is more than just a demon in the sack.

I leaned down and gently captured her lips with mine, simply enjoying the feel of her so close to me. The beautiful smell of her skin in such close proximity to mine made my head spin. It was rich, musky in a very feminine way, giving it an exotic feel despite the undertones of apple and roses. It was perfect.

I pulled away from her and leaned down to whisper in her ear. Reminding her how much I loved her and how beautiful she was, how sweet and kind, and how I could not imagine anything closer to perfection than her.

She smiled sweetly and kissed me quickly once more before taking my hand and heading for the door.

For the next couple of days we travelled further north, following the Danube as Rose had suggested before jumping into Hungary to avoid getting too close to the Romanian coven. Then, it was into Germany and eventually Poland, where we finally got to hunt something more satisfying than wild dogs.

Eventually, we made it all the way to Warsaw, where we were completely thrown when we caught Alice and Edward's scents, again in the train station. Unfortunately, we could not follow it any further. As far as we could tell, they had not got on a train. There were multiple trails leading to multiple platforms, but they all seemed to return out the same door, leaving us unable to tell where they had headed, let alone how long ago they had left. In a fit of desperation, we rented a hotel room and began travelling various lines in hopes of picking up their scent at another station, but it was fruitless. We had been travelling Europe for ten days, crossing at least six countries, and we still had come no closer to getting to them.

Rose had gone out to purchase some clean clothes. Our stolen ones were now barely rags and we had been here a day and a half now with no leads, so she had decided to go shopping. I had offered to accompany her, but to be honest I was quite relieved when she said she would go alone. We had rented a hotel room the previous night. Rags didn't mean anything when you had a black credit card. We had not spoken to Carlisle since we had been in Albania and I knew he would be worried about us, even if we were being careful to leave a Visa trail for him to follow.

I took a deep breath in and sat down on the bed next to the phone. I was genuinely unsure of what to say to my father. I wanted to reassure him that we would find them, but I could not bring myself to lie. Honestly, I was beginning to think that the two of them did not want to be found; there was simply no other explanation for their complete disappearance from our lives. There was no credit trail. Jasper had contacted Jenks to ask if he had made ID for them in any other names, but he had not. Their phones had been disconnected and now we had completely lost their scents. Despite Rose's insistence that we continue so she could kick Edward's ass for lying to us about Bella splitting up with him, I knew we would have to stop at some point.

Summoning up what little courage I had, I picked up the phone and began dialling Carlisle's cell.

"Dabrowski dom... którzy szukasz? " I put down the phone quickly. Damn, forgot the country code.

I tried again and heard the beeps that told me I was being connected out of country.

"Alice? Edward?" Carlisle answered the phone with such hope and I felt terrible that my voice would let him down.

"Sorry, dad, just me." I heard him sigh at the end of the phone.

"Emmett. Sorry, I saw the international number and thought..."

"It's okay, dad. I did the same thing a couple of days ago when Rosie called my cell from the payphones at the train station."

"So you haven't found anything then?" His voice sounded weary, like he had suddenly aged.

"Well, we managed to follow them all the way up to Warsaw, Poland, but we've lost them. Their scents are all over the train station, but we can't work out which way they went...They tried the same trick in Romania though, so we might get lucky again."

"You've done better than I ever could have hoped for, son. If they don't want to be found I suspect it will be impossible to get those two. Have there been any other scents following them?"

"Nah, since we got out of Italy it's just us; apparently Aro was telling the truth when he spoke to you."

I heard Carlisle murmur his thanks to God. He was good friends with the Volturi and had not wanted to think of them harming his family.

"How is Rose holding up?" His voice was full of concern. Apparently I wasn't the only person to have noticed she wasn't her usual self. Rose had fought with all of the members of our family many times before, but she had never let anything said during an argument get to her before, even when Edward had cruelly called her spoiled and vapid. I had had words with him after that, but Rose had just brushed it off. In her opinion, family members were meant to have disagreements. They knew she loved them, she knew they loved her, and anything else was inconsequential.

"She's been better. She thinks it's all her fault." I thought back to the night before, when we had realised we had very possibly lost the trail, remembering her sobs as she admitted she blamed herself for everything, not just telling Edward, but everything. Rose felt that if she had been nicer to Bella, she would never have split up with Edward (it didn't seem to matter when I pointed out this was not the case). The, she said that if she had asked Jasper to hunt with her before Bella's party, Bella would never have been hurt. Next, she claimed that she had caused the rift between Jasper and Alice, one I knew fine well had been brewing for years, not months. Finally, she said that Edward had left because he could not stand being around her...

I also knew that if I told Carlisle any of this, Rose would put me on a booty embargo until 2020. Our sex life hadn't exactly been popping lately, but I was hoping to get some before jet packs were the norm... actually, I wonder if I could make one now, maybe Rose would help...

Stop getting distracted and talk to your dad, Emmett!

"I think she needs to see you guys, especially Esme and... and maybe even Bella, to know everyone doesn't hate her." I knew for a fact Rose had been convinced Bella hated her from the first time they met. She had been angry to have a human surprised on her at home and had broken a plate in frustration. She was worried Bella thought she was a diva. I had told her she was a diva, but that wasn't going to stop Bella from liking her.

"I think that's a good idea. We could use some help here at the moment anyway." Carlisle's voice was tense and I wondered what I had missed.

"What's going on?" I demanded.

"Well, it's really nothing to worry about... " Carlisle was clearly trying to placate me, but I didn't like it. There wasn't much that got him worked up; Carlisle was a naturally calm soul, unlike me, and he was not easily ruffled.

"Dad! Just tell me! Is Esme okay? What about Jasper? Oh God, nothing has happened to Bella, has it?" I could not stand the thought of anything happening to my baby sister. I had so much I still needed to tell her! I needed to apologise for leaving, I needed to teach her how to play Halo...

"Nothing's happened to anyone, Emmett. We've just had a little problem, but at the moment everything is fine."

"You know what that sounds like, dad? That sounds like everything could be not fine really fast."

"Apparently, quite a lot happened while we were away from Forks, Emmett. Laurent came back looking for Bella a couple of months ago," I bit back a growl. Laurent had travelled up to Denali after out altercation with James last year and I knew he had gotten quite close to Irina before suddenly disappearing. She had been searching for him ever since, but no one had once thought he might have gone back to Forks. If he touched my baby sister, I would hunt him down and burn him myself.

"He was about to attack her when the pack appeared," Carlisle explained. I sighed with relief. I hadn't exactly been a fan of the mongrels when we had first met them all those years ago, but if they had saved my sister, I was in their debt.

"Unfortunately," Carlisle continued, unaware of my inner monologue, "It appears he was there at Victoria's bidding. She's been trying to get past the wolves for a couple of weeks; the pack couldn't work out why until Jacob Black mentioned it to Bella, who immediately guessed what she was after. Apparently, she has decided to get revenge for James' death and fixated on Bella as the way to do it." I really did growl this time, literally seeing red with anger. There was no way that skanky, ginger bitch was getting anywhere near Bella.

"She's perfectly safe, Emmett," Carlisle reassured me and I worked at calming myself. Damn, I wish Jasper was around; he was always great at picking up when I was angry and trying to calm me. Well, usually he was., When I threw Edward's piano out the window he had just sat back and watched; honestly, I think he had wanted to join in. "We've liaised with the wolves and worked out a schedule so she is being watched 24/7. She's, well, less than happy about it, but she's safe."

Of course she was. I knew Carlisle would never do anything to put her in jeopardy.

"You truly don't think there is anything else you can do there?" Carlisle's voice reminded me of the reason I was in Europe instead of looking after my baby sis.

"I don't think they want to be found, Carlisle. Maybe we just need to give them some time..."

He murmured in agreement.

"We'll hang around another day or two and see if we can get any more leads, but if we don't I think we are gonna head home by the weekend." I felt terrible giving up, I really did, but if they did not want to be found there was nothing more we could do.

"Of course. Send my love to Rose, will you? And let us know your flight details; one of us will come and pick you up. I'll let Aro know that you will be returning to the states. He's been in touch with me, keeping me up to date on your progress."

"Thanks, dad." I sat back down on the bed. "See you soon."

"Bye, son." He put down the phone and I did the same, swinging my legs up onto the bed. Victoria was back. I had known that one was trouble. I didn't understand why we hadn't killed her when we had the had hung around Forks long enough after we got back from Phoenix, but Alice had said she would not do anything and Edward seemed to agree. Jasper had been like me, eager to finish it, seeing no sense in leaving loose ends, but in the end Carlisle's compassion had won and we had left her to it.

And now we were working with the wolves. That was unexpected but could be fun. I had always kind of wanted to fight one when we first met. The bears in Forks were good this time of year too.

_A thousand hundred pounds of pure muscle, nine feet of power..._

I let my mind wander as I waited for Rosie.

* * *

**A couple of quick notes**

**(i) Droberta Turna Severin is a city in Romania, on the Danube. The pink house really exists, I lived in it for a month a couple of summers ago on an archaeological dig with uni. **

**(ii) _Dabrowski dom... którzy szukasz _is Polish for 'Dabrowski house, who are you looking for?' according to Google Translate. **

**(iii) RL and this chapter have both been kicking my ass recently, so I'm really sorry for the wait. **

**(iv) I don't know how, but I won the Madam Award from the Gem Awards Jasper Round. Christag Banners was nice enough to make me some pretty artwork as a prize, which you can see here ****christagbanners . /2011/02/gem-award-winner-newtowngirl . html - just remove the spaces and then send her some love!**

**(v) Review! **


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